This is BY FAR my favorite chapter, so I hope you like it as much as I do! If you would, leave a comment and vote! Thank you kindly!
(F/B): favorite book
(F/S): favorite show
I sat silence as the doctor checked over my heart rate and other vitals. She asked me questions and I answered them to the best of my ability, but I was extremely exhausted. I was always left like this after a bad attack. My muscles were weak and my mind was running slowly. I felt someone tap on my check and I looked up to see the doctor looking at me, a concerned look on her face.
"Did you hear me, (Y/N)?" I shook my head. "I said, you need to go back to your dorm and rest, but I'm sure you've heard it all before." I nodded once, used to hearing that order after every attack.
"Can I see Suguro?" I asked. I was worried about him and felt guilty for him being hurt. If I could have calmed down and controlled myself, he wouldn't be hurt.
"(Y/N), settle. Yes, you can see him, but you have to remain calm. You can't work yourself up again; you're already exhausted as it is." I nodded and thanked the doctor. She led me to a nurse who smiled and led me to where Bon's room was located. I stood in front of the door for a few minutes, trying to figure out what I was as going to say. I had multiple things to apologize for and I wasn't sure how the boy would react. He had looked very mad at me earlier, I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't want to see me. I wouldn't want to see me either.
Finally working up what little courage I had, I knocked on the door. I heard Bon's voice, telling me to come in. I opened the door and slowly made my way into the room. Shima was sitting in a chair by Bon's bed. Bon said something to Shima and the other boy stood up and made his way past me but not before sending me a small smile. I stepped further into the room and stopped a few paces away from the bed.
I hid my eyes behind my long hair, not wanting to look the older student in the eyes. I could feel tears of guilt and fear start to prickle at the corners of my eyes. "I'm sorry," I choked out. "It's all my fault you got hurt again," I said, a sob starting to well up in my throat. "Every time we're partnered up for missions something goes wrong and you get hurt. You have to hate me, how could you not?" I sobbed. I stayed quiet, not able to say anything else. All the stress and anxiety and insecurities had surfaced and had come crashing down on me. I was at my breaking point.
I was suddenly tugged into his lap and strong chest. I tired to pull back, but a strong hand pushed my head into his shoulder. Not possessing the energy to fight back, I simply clenched the front of his hospital issued shirt in my fists. "None of that was your fault, none of it at all," he soothed, stroking my hair. He set his chin on the top of my head, and I closed my eyes.
"If I would have just-" He shushed me gently, cutting me off.
"No, none of it was your fault. You couldn't control what happened." I heard him take a deep breath before he continued. "I know a panic attack when I see one, (Y/N)," he whispered, and I tensed in his arms. "A lot of people suffer from them, but that doesn't make you or anyone else weak. We can't help that we're scared of one thing or another or if they're just apart of us. You can't control them; it's not your fault." He stayed silent for a moment, letting the words soak in. "Do you understand me, (Y/N)," he asked, and I nodded against his shoulder. He pushed me back by my shoulders and cupped my face with both hands, causing me to blush. "And why do you think I could ever hate you?" he whispered in a disbelieving tone, his eyes searching my face. I shrugged and looked away. He stayed quiet, obviously waiting for a verbal response.
"I mess up a lot and only ever seem to get in the way," I muttered, not wanting to voice my insecurities.
"Is that what you think?" he asked. He used the hand still on my face to make me look at him. "You are amazing, (Y/N). An amazing fighter, an amazing student, and an amazing friend." His compliments made me blush. I wanted to look away, but his firm hand prevented me from doing so. "And everyone messes up, (Y/N), it's part of being human." I nodded at his words. Bon shifted in the bed, suddenly looking uncomfortable. I frowned at his sudden change in demeanor. He wouldn't meet my eyes, and there was a prominent blush on his cheeks.
"Bon?" I whispered.
"And how could I hate the girl I like?" His words made my breath catch in my throat as I stared at him with wide eyes. "I like you, (Y/N), a lot," he continued, both of our cheeks turning an even deeper red. Not able to find my words, I simply leaned my head on his shoulder, taking in his sweet scent.
"That's what I couldn't tell you," I murmured into his shoulder. "I like you a lot too, Bon," I confessed. "I'm sorry I yelled at you. I didn't know how to tell you. I was confused and scared. I'm sorry." Strong arms wrapped around me once more.
"There's no need to be sorry. It was my fault. I shouldn't have pushed you like I did. You didn't want to tell me and I should have respected that. I was so worried about what you thought of me, but I couldn't bring myself to tell you how much I liked you." I only nodded into his shoulder, just soaking in the moment.
A heavy weight seemed to be gone from my shoulders and my chest felt looser than it had in a long time. I simply stayed with my head on his shoulder, wishing this moment would never end. I felt so comfortable with him and so at peace, like nothing bad could ever happen to me. "(Y/N)?" he asked and I hummed in response. "Can I ask you something?" he asked, his voice sounding weak. I pushed back so I could look at his face. His face was red, but I stayed silent, not wanting to interrupt him. He took a shaky breath and took my hands into his own. "W-would you like to be my girlfriend?" he asked shakily. I felt a deeper blush spread onto my face, if that was even humanly possible.
"Of course, silly," I said with a cheeky smile. I put my arms around his neck and leaned my forehead onto his, closing my eyes. "Can't believe you even thought you had to ask," I said through a chuckle.
"Hey!" he exclaimed loudly. "I just wanted to make sure," he explained, trying to defend himself. I only laughed, just soaking in the pure bliss. The feeling didn't last long as anxiety suddenly swept into my stomach and I leaned back in his hold. "(Y/N)?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Uh, so I need to make some things clear to you before anything else happens." He nodded for me to continue, squeezing my forearms. "I've already mentioned that I was bullied in eighth grade and it had to do with the relationship I was in so I'd really rather not announce it the everyone." Bon looked confused. "Like, I just don't want anyone else getting involved is all." He nodded in understanding.
"I understand. We don't have to make it public yet. If that's what you want, that's fine with me." For some reason, he looked unsatisfied.
"We can still be a couple in public, I do want that. That's what I didn't have in my last relationship. I just don't want to scream it to the whole world," I explained and he nodded, the confusion gone from his face. Bon pulled me back into his chest and I snuggled my face into the crook of his neck.
"Okay, that sounds good to me."
{Line Break}
The droning voice of the teacher went on and on as I sketched on the paper in front of me. I was really supposed to be paying attention to the grammar rules our English was teaching us, but it was so boring and I already understood it all. She was going over examples and I didn't need them; I had already completed the entire page. The teacher knew I wasn't paying attention and tried to catch me off my guard, but having the entire page completed came to my advantage.
"Why aren't you in the honors English class? Your super smart; this class is obviously too easy for you," Anthony asked from beside me. I stared down at the person I was drawing. It was no one in particular, just a drawing.
"There is summer homework for the honors class, and I don't have the time to do it," I told him. Anthony was nice enough and had good intentions, but he was starting to annoy me. I wasn't stupid and I could tell he liked me, even if just a little. It was the little things that tipped me off. It was the constant smiles, the glances he sent me from across the room during Spanish class, and then there was the multiple offers to visit his dorm to hang out. Every time I told him I had something after school, but I never mentioned a boyfriend or cram school. I didn't want to draw any more attention to myself.
When the bell finally rang, I was the first one out of my seat. I just wanted to get out of that classroom. "Hey, (Y/N), wait up!" Anthony called after me. I internally groaned but stopped anyway. Just because he was annoying didn't mean I could act like a jerk to him. I didn't want to obtain that kind of reputation. I stopped and looked back as he jogged up to me, that usual smile on this face. He was always happy and it weirded me out a little. I never once saw the boy without a smile on his face. It was kind of ridiculous.
We headed out the door together and down to the math hall, Anthony talking my ear off the entire time. He was a nice boy, he truly was, I could see he had the right intentions, but he was a little too talkative for me. I liked Bon because he could tell when I didn't want to talk yet talked to me when I did want to talk. He was understanding and never pushed me to do something out of my comfort zone. He was a sweet boy and never pushed his limits. I suddenly blushed, realizing I had been gushing over the guy. Sure he was my boyfriend, but it was still odd to think about him that way.
"(Y/N)? Are you listening?" Anthony's voice cut into my thoughts and made me jump. I looked over to see him staring at me, an expectant look on his face.
"I'm sorry," I said nervously, tucking a stray piece of hair behind my ear. "I was spacing off; I have a lot of my mind," I explained, hoping that would settle for him.
"That's alright," he said with another one of his grins. "I said, I know you have a busy schedule, but I was wondering if you wanted to come hang out today. It doesn't have to be at my dorm, we could go to the park or something." Ah geez, he's practically asking me out on a date! It suddenly hit me that it was Tuesday.
"I'm sorry, but I have tutoring after school and then I'm going to dinner with some friends." At least I was telling the truth this time. Tuesday's were our set day for tutoring and Rin had invited us over for dinner tonight. Every month, we had one scheduled day off of cram school for the teachers to have a meeting and every time that came up, Rin made dinner for us all.
"Oh, okay. Maybe another time, have fun, (Y/N)," he said has we parted ways and he headed off toward his math class. I let out a sigh of relief and headed off in he opposite direction. I entered my math class and quickly located Bon who was talking to a group of boys I had come to know. They were nice enough but not as nice as others I'd met. Not wanting to interrupt, I went and sat in my seat, waiting for class to start. Soon enough, Bon came over and sat next to me.
"How's your day so far?" he asked kindly, a smile on his lips. I smiled right back at him.
"Alright, nothing special." He nodded and we fell silent when the teacher entered he room. Math was an easy class for me with only a few tiny bumps. The school day passed fairly quickly after that, as did my tutoring session with Bon. We parted ways as I went to my dorm to get changed for dinner; I didn't want to be in my stiff school uniform anymore.
Reaching my dorm, I made my way to my room and went in. I quickly grabbed my black leggings, my (F/B) T-shirt, and my (F/S) sweatshirt before heading off to the showers. I got a quick shower and got changed. Slipping on my black combat boots, I once again grabbed my keys and wallet before heading out the door. Exiting the main doors, I found Bon standing in front of the porch. He was wearing a striped shirt with a black leather jacket and black pants. I blushed slightly at the sight of him. Shaking my head, I hopped down the stairs to meet him. He smiled down at me and without a word we started off toward Rin's dorm.
About halfway there, Bon started up small talk which I eagerly responded to. Normally I couldn't keep small talk, but it was easy with him. There was usually something to talk about, and if there wasn't, silence was always a comfortable option. He was good at making me laugh; he knew what I found funny. I had a very dry sense of humor and Bon had quickly caught on.
As we walked, I felt his hand brush mine. I blushed, not sure if he was hinting at something or if it was just by accident. I left it go, figuring he would tell me. Once again, his hand brushed mine, but this time he followed by grabbing my hand in his own. I was suddenly glad I left my hair down after my shower so he couldn't see the likely prominent blush on my face. "Is this alright?" he asked. I nodded and smiled up at him. That was another thing I loved about him; he was such a gentleman. He never took any steps I wasn't ready for.
Before long, we reached Rin's dorm. The front doors were unlocked and Bon opened the door for me. We quickly made our way to the kitchen area on the floor above. When we entered the room, it suddenly went quiet. It took me a minute to realize that I was still holding Bon's hand, and I turned a deeper shade of red, if that was even possible. "I called it!" Shima suddenly yelled. "Rin, you owe me 2000 yen!" I giggled when Bon threatened to beat both boys up, knowing he would never do that. I guess I could get used to this.