༺ ¤○•° Sharay °•○¤ ༻
I was so tired I fell straight to sleep after dinner. My dreams were chaotic though as I swirled through marsh grass and smell the sweet scent of cinnamon.
I woke up at about 9am to Lunk asking to be let out and started making some oven fried chicken. There was some left over rice too that I thought Jaebeom (yes I got it right this time) would like.
"That smells great!" I heard from just over my shoulder and I nearly jumped through the roof.
"What the...You scared me to death. Don't creep up on me like that."
Jaebeom just smiled in apology and leaned in closer sniffing the chicken. At least I thought he was sniffing the chicken until he said, "Apples and vanilla go well with cinnamon," and turned around and left me just standing there with my mouth open. He had to be messing with me.
After eating and getting ready, we all headed to my dad's office. We explained to Jaebeom that Dad/Sam is an M.D. who works with people who have been severely injured and are in pain. As such, many can't make it into the office in the morning, so he works later in the day and has tons of paperwork to catch up on after the day is done. We also let him know that training would take place in that office. I would be working with him on vocabulary, communication skills, and things like that when I wasn't doing school. My mom would be covering the retraining of his brain to hear the sounds in the English language. Both of us would be addressing spelling, sentence structure, and other "fun" stuff like that.
Daniel had the easy job. He just had to do the school work Mom prepared for him. Since we home school, we school year round but do a lighter schedule in the summer. Since Daniel was just going into 8th grade, he usually was able to crank through all his work quickly and regularly finished in about 4 hours. After that, he was able to then play on Minecraft to his heart's content. As he was already ahead in studies for his age, and read like a maniac, he was given this leeway.
Our days would be long while training Jaebeom, so we brought Lunk with us to the office as well. He loved going to the office, as there were a few patients who gave him all kinds of loving. Leaving him home alone for 8 hours would have been too much for him to bear. We'd done this often enough in the past that he was familiar with the routine.
⊱ ♫ ────── ⋆Jaebeom⋆ ────── ♫ ⊰
Four hours into this testing and I was exhausted. I hadn't worked this hard in ages. My brain felt like my body had during my trainee days. I was frustrated as well, as I knew there were sounds I just couldn't hear clearly. It was like I was listening to the world through water and mud. Trying to grasp the pronunciation was even more of a challenge. My tongue and lips just didn't want to cooperate. I hoped this stage wouldn't last long.
"Don't worry," TJ said as if reading my mind. "In a couple of days you'll wonder why things were ever a challenge. When it comes to your mouth, the brain tells the muscles what to do, just like when you are learning a new dance routine. We'll work one piece at a time and then start putting them all together. It'll go fairly fast. I have confidence, not only in you, but because I have done this with numerous other people as well and it always works. Tomorrow will be a half day, and Sharay will work with you on vocab, conversation, and reading after the formal training session."
We found out that I struggled hearing individual sounds and pronouncing almost everything. I was extra horrible with the sounds /v/, /a/, /z/, /x/, /th/, /sh/, and anything with the /r/ or /l/ sounds in it. I was amazed that there was so much to learn when it came to the placement of my tongue, the shape of my lips, and other nuances necessary to make the words not sound like I had a thick Korean accent.
TJ had me use a mirror to see my mouth placement, a Q-tip to rub against my gums so I could focus the expulsion of air when making certain sounds, and a phone like device fashioned from some PVC plumbing pipe so I could hear my own voice without background interference or distortion. It was a variation of the ear pieces we use for hearing our voices when signing.
We finally took a lunch break, and started right back up again. After about four hours of evaluation we launched right in with the actual retraining of my brain. Everything we did once the training sessions began required keeping a beat to a metronome. I was required to react and respond on beat every other second. TJ was relentless. Everything about the process made sense. I just needed to work it. I could see the correlation to dance practice and really appreciated what we had gone through as trainees. They had used a similar approach; they just didn't know they were training our brains in addition to our bodies and voices.
At least I could keep a beat, or so I thought. When I had to try something unfamiliar and keep a beat at the same time, I seemed to only be able to do one thing or the other. Who knew something that seemed so easy could be so difficult. I knew I had to take this approach back and have it used for teaching foreign trainees how to speak Korean. It would just need to be modified. Maybe Sharay would help with this.
By 4pm I was exhausted and all of us, except for Sam who had more paperwork to complete, left for home. The Chus were expected at 6:30 and we needed to grab a bite to eat and Sharay said something about baking.
"Go lie down for a bit until dinner," TJ told me."You worked really hard and your brain needs a rest."
I didn't need to be told twice. Between the work and the time change, I was wiped out. I think I fell asleep while I was in the process of lying down. In any event, I was sound asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.
I woke to the most delicious smell ever. I quickly freshened up and proceeded to the kitchen. TJ was just setting the table with the help of Daniel. Sharay was in the kitchen doing something by the stove while softly singing Japanese to something I recognized. Wait! Japanese? I didn't know she spoke Japanese!
"You speak Japanese?" I asked. But got no response, so I tapped her on the shoulder thinking maybe she hadn't heard me.
Sharay's reaction was different than I had expected. I thought I might startle her, like I had this morning when I spoke to her when she was making the chicken, but instead she turned around and gave me a look like she was ready to kill. What had I done?
"Sorry," I murmured, retreating a bit. "I didn't mean to make you angry. I was just trying to get your attention. Umm. Yeah right. I didn't know you speak Japanese."
By this point I was floundering. I wasn't sure how someone could make me feel both so comfortable and so off balance all at the same time.
"I'm not angry and I don't...speak Japanese that is. I'm just singing what I hear," she said quickly, tapping her headphones, and turning back around to finish what she was doing, but not before I saw her face relax a bit and turn a bit pink.
Daniel pulled me aside and in a whisper said, "Don't mind my sister. She's like that. If you touch her when she can't see you or hear you coming, her brain sometimes registers even a gentle tap as something way more forceful. It's like her brain amplifies the signal. Don't take it personally. Just approach her from the front and you'll be fine. It's called sensory defensiveness. The opposite is sensory seeking. You may know people like that. They always have to touch things and never give you personal space. It's like their signals are dampened. They're the opposite side of the same coin."
I had to remember this about her, and that last bit brought Jackson to mind and made me reflect on how I often responded to him. Things to ponder. Seems like I might learn more here than just English.
Dinner was a gastronomical delight. Maybe they were easing me into Western cooking. TJ had made some meatloaf with BBQ sauce on it. I could taste the garlic, onions and black pepper in the meat. There was something else, but I would have to ask about it at another time when I wasn't busy shoving food in my mouth. That training had made me hungry.
The BBQ sauce was sweet and spicy. We had baked potatoes with butter, sour cream, and cheese. I discovered that Sharay had been steaming broccoli in garlic water when I had approached her before. It was delicious. Steamed just the right amount of time in the garlic water made is taste sweet.
After eating, Daniel got up and began clearing the table. Everyone seemed to have a plan and so I stood to help out, not quite sure what to do.
"Though we have a dishwasher," Daniel offered, "we wash them by hand, as it is faster." He continued, "I dry and put away while Sharay washes."
"This would be a good chance for you to do an activity called rapid naming rapid recognition," chimed in TJ. "Everything can be a learning experience and we can determine what vocabulary you need to add to your repertoire. Just say any words you know in English for the items you touch or deal with. Like bowl, plate, cabinet, and so on."
TJ addressed her daughter, "Sharay, keep tabs of the words he doesn't know, tell him what they are as you go along, and add those to your vocab list for him. Okay?"
I turned to Sharay and asked, "Can I help by writing the words down so we know what they are?"
She laughed at me instead and said, "You're not getting out of helping that easily. Pick up a dish towel and help Daniel dry. He's such a slow poke on a good day, and I get slowed down waiting."
I was a little confused about how she was going to know what words to add if we didn't keep a list as we went along, when Daniel provided the answer.
"She has a gifted memory. Doesn't forget a thing. Watch out though. She holds grudges forever since she never forgets a single infraction."
I shelved that bit of information and grabbed a dish towel. I didn't want to add to the list of things she would hold against me, since I realized that I had already racked up quite a number.
༺ ¤○•° Sharay °•○¤ ༻
I nearly jumped out of my skin. The tap on my shoulder felt like I was being thumped by a sledge hammer. Turning, thinking it was Daniel; I fixed Jaebeom with a murderous glare. Oops. I quickly spun around hoping he hadn't seen my expression. How embarrassing. I reflected that I really needed to work on controlling my anger, even with my brother. This guy was going to think I was the worst person ever. I pretended not to hear what Daniel told him, but was secretively happy that he explained my reaction in such a casual way that it didn't make me sound like the freak I often believed I was.
Dinner was peaceful, and it seemed that Jaebeom enjoyed the meal. I didn't have the heart to tell him that this was probably not really Western food since my mom grew up all over the world and developed her own sense of cooking based on a compilation of all her experiences. Never mind. It wasn't Korean food, so it was broadening his palate one way or the other. No sense pointing this out.
During dishes, I learned that Jaebeom's receptive vocabulary was way stronger than his expressive vocabulary. He was very forthright about telling me when he didn't know a word, when he understood it because of the context but couldn't have come up with it on his own, and when he was familiar with something. I kept a mental note of these things and decided I needed to jot them down later on so I could better monitor his progress; but for now I could just use my memory.
Where I was thankful to Daniel earlier for explaining the whole sensory defensiveness thing, I sure wished he would shut up when he told Jaebeom I kept grudges. I did NOT. Okay. So I did. But he still should have kept his mouth shut. I hated it when private stuff about me was shared with people.
"And you just added one more thing to the list of things I hold against you, Daniel! Stop sharing things about me!" I yelled at him. I did laugh as I said this realizing that I was just proving his point and had been caught.
With the dishes done in double time thanks to Jaebeom, I set about milling some wheat to make some chocolate chip cookies. "What's that?" Jaebeom asked me, looking at the wheat and the machine I had pulled down from the cabinet.
"Oh, I'm milling some flour," I told him. "I want to bake some cookies and they taste better when you make everything from scratch. Way better than with processed flour at any rate. Do you like chocolate chip cookies?"
Amazingly, Jaebeom was helpful in the kitchen. I asked for help retrieving things from the fridge and the cabinet, and the process went smoothly. Usually I kick everyone out of the kitchen while I'm baking, as they tend to get under foot. He seemed to know how to keep out of my way and would quickly and smoothly shift in anticipation of my movements. I marveled at this and chalked it up to his dancing skills.
At 6:30pm there was a loud bang at the door which set Lunk off into fits of woofing. Without waiting for anyone to open the door, Hailey barged in.
"Hey! I'm Hailey," she said as she came in, dodged a wet kiss from Lunk, and made her way into the kitchen and offered her hand to Jaebeom.
"You must be JB," she smiled with her cherub like face, showing him her infectious grin.
"He prefers Jaebeom," I corrected her.
Everyone loved Hailey. She was a ball of sunshine, always cheerful, and her laugh was contagious. I was thankful that she wasn't shy with strangers, unlike me. Also since her mom was from Hungary, she wasn't a stranger to foreigners or people who didn't speak English, or at least didn't speak it well. Her mom still had a strong Hungarian accent after having lived here for years.
"Hello, Hailey," Jaebeom responded. "Sharay told me a little about you. I would have recognized you instantly from her description."
Hailey thumped me on the shoulder, but since I saw it coming, I barely reacted unlike before with the tap Jaebeom had given me. I think he noticed the difference in my response. Seems he was listening and understood what Daniel had told him. Smart boy.
"What have you been telling him?" she demanded.
"Just that you're a little cinnamon bun," I replied.
"Oh. That's okay then. By the way Marie called and she won't be able to make it tonight. She has a gymnastics meet this coming week. I'm not sure how much time she'll have to come down from St. Pete over the summer between competitions and getting ready to head out of state for college. She did promise she'd make it down at least once before heading off though. Maybe we can Snapchat or Skype with her a bit later."
I could only nod, because before we could continue our conversation the door flew open and in came Sally and her little brother Alex. Alex, who was a year younger than Daniel, mumbled "Hi" and darted off to the playroom. He and Daniel had a Minecraft activity planned for the night. As the door was closing it opened again and Lori entered with her little boy Mickey.
This was when things got a little crazy. Lunk, was beside himself. His favorite little person had arrived. He squeaked and wriggled. Drool and spit was flying everywhere, and his tail was wagging so hard that if one were to stand next to it you would surely get a bruise. Oh and that was the dog. The baby had the same reaction, except for the tail part. It was a total love fest.
It took a few minutes for things to settle down and in the meantime Lori and Jaebeom had exchanged greetings. We learned Danny wasn't going to make it until later, and maybe not even then, as he was delayed with work. Just as I heard this, my phone pinged and I got a message that read, "Can't make it tonight. See you in church tomorrow. You need to introduce me to JB then. I can't believe I'm missing tonight. I am so fan-girling over the chance to meet JB!!!! My mom is killing me by not letting me come, but we have my grandparent over tonight. Em."
I shot a quick text back letting her know he prefers to be called Jaebeom, and that we would see her at service tomorrow night.
I looked up from my phone to let everyone know Emily wouldn't make it either. I left out the fangirl part. Maybe it was just as well she couldn't make it. Sally was already giggling and turning funny colors every time she looked at Jaebeom. She barely managed to say "Hello" without flapping her arms and giggling hysterically when he introduced himself to her. It was going to be a long night.
⊱ ♫ ────── ⋆Jaebeom⋆ ────── ♫ ⊰
I didn't realize how many common words I understood but couldn't come up with on my own. I still couldn't figure out how Sharay was going to keep track of all the vocabulary, but decided to trust that TJ knew her daughter or would have made plans to have them written down.
Helping Sharay in the kitchen was fun. She was a wiz when it came to baking. She never once stopped to consult a recipe and deftly milled the wheat, cracked eggs, measure, stirred, and beat the ingredients.
"So what color would you like your cookies?" she inquired.
"Color?" I questioned.
"Sure. If you're going to have homemade cookies you might as well have some fun and make them a little more interesting. Just so you know, some colors do come out better than others."
I was pleasantly surprised that she offered me the option to decide, and when I suggest' "How about blue?" she graced me with a smile.
"Okay Percy. Blue it is!" she said before explaining that in "Percy Jackson'' his mom made him blue food all the time.
As the cookies were in the oven there was another loud bang at the door and this short round cherub looking girl burst in. She was a bundle of energy and virtually barreled through the house, past Lunk, and introduced herself to me.
Hailey was a cinnamon bun. It was an apropos description of her. I was happy to have Sharay clarify what she should call me. That made it easier on me, as I was not as comfortable speaking up in front of others as I had been with Sharay.
Before long, more people were coming in. There was Lori and her baby, and Sally and her brother. The brother quickly headed off to find Daniel, so I didn't really catch his name. He hadn't been mentioned on the drive from the airport, so it flew past me during introductions.
The interaction between baby Mickey and Lunk was hysterical. I was surprised at how calm Lori was when that huge creature approached her infant. I was instantly reminded of the interactions between Yugyeom and Bambam before Bammy hit his growth spurt.
Sally was apparently one of the younger ones and, based on her reaction when I introduced myself, I judged her to be a bit boy crazy. I was relieved when I learned that the other teen wouldn't make it. One would probably be enough. Good thing Sharay had warned me she could react like this.
As the oven buzzer sounded, Sharay hopped up and returned to the kitchen. I followed to help out and get a look at how these cookies turned out. I couldn't wait to taste them. The smell was beyond description. And they really were blue!
As we approached the kitchen, I heard Sally whisper something to Lori. Lori in turn chirped. "Sally wants to know if JB has a girlfriend!" to which Sally thumped her and turned red.
I responded playfully, "Anyone who bakes me blue cookies has the job, if she wants it."
"Not likely," the resident patisserie responded.
"You're not on her bias list'" Lori and Hailey said in unison, followed by much laughter. It was a matter of fact statement, but it stung to hear it. Sharay merely nodded in agreement. How many times had I been reminded of this fact now? I was losing track.
I shrugged it off as best I could and, only because of a loud WOOF, noticed that a tall lanky guy had arrived. He had apparently shown up during this exchange, as he looked at me with pity in his eyes.
Nate was not as tall as I was. Well he was about my height, but his posture was even worse than mine, so I appeared taller at any rate. He was as skinny as Mark, but his shoulders weren't quite as broad. As described by Sharay, he had ear piercings and blue black hair. Hailey immediately jumped up and gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.
Nate was quiet and observant of his surroundings. I was curious if he picked up that my tone from earlier wasn't all jest. I wondered if there was more in common between him and Mark other than just their build. If so, I would have to be on my guard, as Mark was always the one who could read me. The only one who could pick up on my nonverbal cues faster was Jinyoung.
Introductions were made again with his arrival. The TV was turned on and some show was tuned in through the computer, but no one seemed to pay attention to it, but rather, a relaxed camaraderie played out before me.
Sharay had left the kitchen after transferring the cookies to a platter and informed everyone they were ready. After being told to help myself, I found out that I had a new addiction that was even better than strawberry milk. I'd have to be careful or I would pack on the pounds. Maybe I would go for a run in the morning, since I hadn't exercised in the last few days. This thought crossed my mind as I helped myself to a third blue chocolate chip cookie.
Nate had gone over to the keyboard located on the wall next to the front door and had begun to tinker around a bit. I cautiously approached, not wanting to come across too brazen.
"Can I join you?" I asked. "Sharay told me you were a musician. Maybe we can have some fun collaborating a bit."
"I'd like that, though I'm not a professional like you," Nate responded.
I found his humility belied his skill, as we began messing around with some riffs. After some time, we had the start of a melody going and we decided to take a break for some more cookies, but not before I asked for some paper and wrote out a few notes so we wouldn't forget out progress.
"So if we come up with something while I'm here, can I use it on the next album if I give you credit?" I asked.
"Seriously?" Nate responded. "That would be awesome. You should have Sharay help you with the lyrics though. I suck at that and she's great. It could be your first all English song."
I liked that idea. I really liked that idea. On so many levels.
Nate said he would get with me later in the week when my training schedule was a little more settle, so we could coordinate some time to get together again. I was excited to think that I would get some composing done too while I was here.
He also said that we needed to make the most of my time here and suggested that we had to have a least one beach day, a chance to go do some paint ball, archery, and some fire spinning. He wanted some tips on b-boying from me. He even mentioned that TJ used to be a windsurfing instructor and he had been hinting at getting her to teach him how to windsurf and my presence might just make it happen. I told him I was game for anything, but my priority was learning English. I was also very clear that I would just defer to watching him fire spin and not try it. I think JYP would kill me if he knew I even thought about doing something like that, much less actually try it. In any case I was really excited by the prospect of interesting things to do.
Somewhere along the way, bean bag chairs had been moved from the play room to the living room. I found myself on one next to Sharay who was playing with baby Mickey. Her countenance was totally different with him. She was relaxed and comfortable. I could see that though she gently guided him, she let him take the lead for the most part. She allowed him to explore and experiment with his surroundings. She was just there to keep him out of danger and encourage him when he couldn't immediately master a task. She didn't speak in baby talk either, but her tone and intonation were encouraging. At one point, he became fascinated with the necklace she was wearing and kept crawling up and grabbing at it.
I was apparently mesmerized by her interactions with Mickey when I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was Nate. Damn. Had he noticed?
"Yes?" I asked.
"Come in the kitchen and let's make some popcorn," Nate prompted. Apparently he had something to tell me and didn't want to say it is front of the others.
Lamely, knowing I had probably been caught by Nate gawking at Sharay, I excused myself from the rest of the Chus and followed him to the kitchen. Fortunately, Sharay was so engrossed in playing with Mickey, I think she hadn't noticed me. That was both good and bad.
With the TV going, and the hum of the microwave, Nate seemed pretty confident that our conversation would be inaudible by those in the living room.
"Do you have any tattoos?" he asked bluntly.
What a strange way to start a conversation. It was so out of the blue. Looking down I saw the black treble clef and base clef tattoos that he displayed by holding out his arms and turning his wrists upwards.
"No. Not yet. I had been thinking about it. Why?" I responded.
"Well. Don't. Not if you want any chance with her. This is the fasted way to guarantee getting friend-zoned for life."
I was confused. I thought Nate was dating Hailey, yet the look on his face showed something like loss and regret.
I decided not to play dumb and deny that I was interested. "How....? I mean...exactly why...?" I couldn't seem to find the right words to express what I wanted to say. Fortunately Nate seemed to understand.
"If you ask Sam you'll get a huge lecture about tattoos creating micro scars that impact the fascia. I know these are technical terms. Sorry about that. Basically, it can decrease motion and healing of your body in the long run and over time. There's a more technical explanation than that. Ask Sam. He's dead set against tattoos because of the work he does. He sees patients with tattoos having way more problems that those who don't."
Nate continued, "Shortly before meeting Sharay I decided to get these tattoos. My mom had okayed it for my seventeenth birthday. I even designed them myself. I was headstrong and determined that I knew better. Despite a half hour lecture by Sam, and Sharay clearly showing contempt for tattoos, four months later I still went and got them. To this day she slaps them every time she sees me. Did you catch when she did that? It's been the same every time for over a year now."
I briefly recalled some interaction when they first approached one another but had been baffled by it. I'd thought maybe it was some kind of strange variation of a hi-five or fist bump.
The look on Nate's face was one of resignation. "Don't get me wrong, I was friend-zoned long before that. I think that I decided on the tattoos as my way of fooling myself into thinking I was the one who was rejecting her. Truth be told, I never had a chance. You however....." He trailed off.
I was torn. Torn between wanting more information and keeping my interest for Sharay at merely a suspicion on his part. Finally, I decided that since he probably already knew I was intrigued by her, I went for fulfilling my need for how to best navigate the waters.
"Okay. So no tattoos. But I'm not on her bias list," I offered weakly.
"Don't worry about that. Just focus on the key things she values the most. Loyalty, integrity, trustworthiness, humor, children, good work ethic, love of the Lord, love of learning, love of reading, and proper grammar." He laughed as he said the last three and acknowledged, "I blew it on those last three long before the tattoos. You, however, have an excuse for bad English grammar, for the time being. Don't blow it off. Oh and if you treat her badly in any way, make her cry or anything, you will have to answer to me as well as all the other Chus."
I merely nodded my head in appreciation. I wasn't sure what else to do or say. He basically was telling me to go after a girl he obviously cared for, maybe even considered as for a potential girlfriend at one time, and threatened me all in one go. At least I seemed to have an ally of sorts.