It was the night before the big mission, and I was with Steve in his quarters...arguing.
I was trying to convince Steve to let me go with him. I had already gotten the okay from Phillips, but apparently Steve didn't like that decision and was trying to talk me out of going.
"You can't go with me on this one, Riana," Steve was insisting.
"Steve," I begged, "please. I want to help you."
"And I want to keep you safe," Steve responded. "I can't lose you, Riana. Not after what almost happened to Bucky. You mean too much to me to lose you on this dangerous trip. I promise, I'll be safe."
Steve's hands were on my arms. He was staring at me with those beautiful blue eyes, full of determination and worry. But not for this mission, for me.
I couldn't take it anymore then. I gave in to my urges and grabbed Steve's face, pulling him for a kiss. At first, Steve was tense and stunned. Honestly, so was I. I couldn't believe I had done that. After all this time, trying to defy my feelings knowing they wouldn't work out after this mission was over, I finally gave up and gave him. And I had no regrets about it.
Steve relaxed and started kissing me back. His arms wrapped around me and held me close to him. We stayed like this for a long time, just standing there, kissing. Not caring about the events of tomorrow, not caring who might come in and catch us, not caring about anything. We were just completely lost in one another.
And in that moment I knew: I was staying. I couldn't leave Steve.
Steve pulled away first, resting his forehead against mine. There was a moment of silence as we both let what just happened hang in the air.
Finally, Steve said, "You can go with Phillips, but that's it."
We both laughed and continued to embrace. I held Steve tight, not wanting to let him go for anything, especially not for this mission. I just wanted to stay here like this for a long time, just like when we had our dance.
Again, Steve broke our silence to tell me, "I'm taking you on a proper date when this is all over. Just the two of us, no awkward double dates with Bucky. Just me and you."
"On one condition," I told him.
Steve arched an eyebrow. "What is it?"
"Promise me you'll come back safe and in one piece. Promise me you'll be here for our date."
Steve nodded. "I promise."
I promise to save you, Steve.
•••••••
The next day, I found myself hiding in the woods with Phillips, Peggy, and a group of soldiers. Steve wouldn't go back on what he said and I was stuck in the sort of sidelines. I would be helping, but I wouldn't be able to stop any sort of harm that could be happening to Steve in there.
Ever since I saved Bucky, and I made this decision to stay in the '40s with Steve, I started worrying that my decisions had drastically changed the future. What if Bucky's near death caused Steve to die earlier than he was supposed to? What if him being with me instead of Peggy changed something?
I was so lost in these thoughts that I almost didn't realize we were given the signal until Colonel Phillips called, "Move out!"
We made a break for it towards Schmidt's hide out. I was clutching my gun to my chest and running like my life depended on it, which it technically did. Hydra agents were waiting for us, obviously, ready to take us down. We started firing our shots first, taking down a great deal of the agents before they could react to our appearance. Their shots hit the ground around me, but never once touched me. Using my powers, I created a shield around as many of the soldiers closest to me as I could, protecting them from the guns.
I fire my gun at some more close Hydra agents, knocking them to the ground. Phillips was beside me, clearing a path to the hide out. I was close on his trail, with a long line of men behind me. I paused to turn around, seeing all the people on our side that I couldn't shield. Guilt brewed inside of me as I whispered a soft apology to their men, and to their families.
I'm sorry I couldn't protect you guys, too.
Peggy touched my shoulder, as if she could read my mind.
"Let's go," she told me.
I nodded and followed her into the hide out.
Once inside, we're attacked by more agents. Our men shoot theirs down, leaving only one standing, who was declaring the Hydra motto: "Cut off one head, two more shall - "
A gun shot coming from Phillips cut off his sentence. "Let's go find two more!"
We continued down the corridor and turned the corner. The man in the giant suit of armor that almost killed Bucky stood back on to me, shooting literal flames from the arm guns. In front of him, I could see Steve backed into a corner.
Anger ran through me. I lifted my gun and shot his suit, causing it to explode. I shielded my eyes until the explosion died down. Steve came from his hiding spot and raced up to me.
"You're late," he teased.
A half smirked crossed my lips. "We ran into some trouble."
Steve started to move towards me, like he was going to kiss me again. And I wanted him to, more than anything. But I knew we were on a mission. So, I had to put my hand up against his muscular chest to stop him.
"Go be a hero," I told him, "then you can kiss me again."
A bright smile spread across Steve's face as he ran off past me. I couldn't help but watch him go, smiling to myself, before falling back in line with Phillips.
We raced into the big room where Schmidt was firing up the jet. More Hydra agents were fighting our men, and a lot of them were getting the upper hand. An agent raced towards Phillips and I, guns blazing. I wasted no time in taking him out.
"Jannat!" Phillips called over the gun fire. I turned to look at him. He motioned towards a small car sat by itself. "Come on, get in!"
I followed his lead and jumped into the back of the vehicle, perching myself in the correct position to shoot anyone who was coming after us. Phillips started the car and took off down the runway, just as Schmidt started moving the plane.
Ahead of us, I could see Steve running after Schmidt's plane as well. It was no use; Steve may have been a super soldier, but that didn't mean he was a super runner as well. He began to slow as we raced up to him. I shoot another Hydra agent that was trying to run after us as well. For the most part, our men were holding their own with the Hydra agents.
We pulled up beside Steve, who had slowed to a stop. Phillips called, "Get in!"
Steve climbed into the car and we took off after the plane once again. It had had a huge start, leaving us with a huge disadvantage. The car seemed to be moving as fast as possible, which wasn't fast enough to catch up with a giant, moving jet. Until Phillips pressed a button on the steering wheel that put us in what I could only describe as "maximum overdrive". We pulled up close enough to the plane that Steve could jump on to it.
He stood in the passenger seat, preparing to jump. He told Phillips, "Keep it steady."
"Wait!" I called. Steve turned to me and I grabbed the collar of his suit, pulling him in to kiss me. He pulled away, looking stunned. "Remember your promise!"
Steve turned to Phillips, who declared, "I'm not kissin' ya!"
The plane had now made it outside. Steve, still seeming a bit shocked, launched himself at the plane, managing to grab on to something as it started to take off. Phillips veered the car very suddenly, as the runway cut off and turned into a drop. I clutched the car as we skid to a stop, just before the drop.
I watched up as Steve climbed into the plane. I couldn't help but smile a little, feeling a bit proud of him, knowing what he was about to accomplish in the coming few minutes.
Then my smile dropped, as did my heart, as I realized something. This is where Steve dies. He battles Schmidt, wins, and flies the plane into the water in order to save New York.
And I was supposed to stop this. But I couldn't.
Because I wasn't on that damn plane.
•••••••
We got back to the base and entered the communication room. Phillips was sat by with another officer, waiting patiently for some updates, while I paced behind them, biting my nails. It was a bad habit that I did mainly when I was nervous, and I was extra nervous right now.
There were ways I could save Steve and not be on the plane, but it was going to take a lot of power and concentration. If anyone broke my concentration for even a moment, it could ruin everything. And, because it would take so much power to reach him from where I was, there was a chance something bad could happen to me. Not death or anything, but I could pass out, or even lose my powers completely. But it would be worth it if it meant saving Steve.
I made a promise to save him. I wasn't about to break that promise.
Finally, after what felt like a life time, the voice I had been waiting for came over the com.
"Come in, this is Captain Rogers. Do you read me?"
Before the other officer could speak, I grabbed him and pulled him out of his chair and sat down.
"Steve!" I exclaimed.
"Riana!" he responded. "Schmidt's dead!"
I know he is.
"And the plane?" I asked, although I knew the answer.
Steve paused before responding, "That's a little bit tougher to explain."
I sighed, still listing the ways I could help him from here in my head. I needed to know where he would be.
"Give me your coordinates, I-I can help you land safely."
"There's not gonna be a safe landing," Steve responded.
Tears were welling up in my eyes. "No, Steve, trust me there will be. Just tell me where you are, I can help - "
"There's no helping me now, Riana," he cut me off. "I got to put her in the water."
Those 8 simple words caused my hands to start trembling. Tears stung my eyes, but I tried to blink them away. The other communication officer had left the room, but Phillips was still there, and the last thing I wanted to do was cry in front of Phillips.
I could help Steve. I knew I could. He just needed to tell me where the goddamn plane was.
"Steve?" I asked.
"Yeah Riana?" Steve responded.
I sniffed, holding back a sob, as I told him, "You're the most amazing man I've ever had the privilege of meeting."
"And you're the most amazing girl I've ever met in my life." Steve paused before adding, "I'm gonna be late for our date."
I let out a chocked laugh that sounded more like a sob. "I know."
"Riana," Steve said, "just...just know that I lo - "
His words became inaudible and the line went staticky. I could almost feel my heart break in two as I let out the sob I had been holding back.
"Goddamn it!" I swore. "God - fucking - dammit!"
I put my head down in my hands and began to cry. My body was violently shaking with my sobs, but I didn't really care too much. I couldn't believe I had lost him like this. I wasn't even upset that I failed my mission; I was upset that I had lost Steve all together. The first man I had truly loved. I lost him.
I slowly raised my head from my hands and looked around. The room was completely empty. I was all alone. Ironic, since that was how I was feeling now anyways.
I turned back to the com and pressed the button, even though I knew there was no one on the other end. Into the microphone, I whispered, "I love you too, Steve."
Then I snapped my fingers.
And I was back in the diner, sitting across from Fury, back in my normal day clothes. I hung my head low, unable to look at him, tears still streaking down my face.
"I'm assuming that since we're still sat here, you didn't complete your mission," Fury said.
In a small voice, I said, "I'm so sorry."
Fury sighed. "You tried, that's all that matters."
I was supposed to save him. And I failed. That's all that matters.
"I'd ask you to go back," Fury continued, "but you've ruined the timeline enough as it is. Or, so I'd assume. I don't know what has been altered and what hasn't, since you're the now only one who knows what everything was supposed to be like before you went back."
Fury grabbed Steve's file in front of me. Before he pulled it away, I could see the photo of the skinny Steve peaking out again, looking at me. The way he had looked at me the night of our double date.
After Fury left, I sat in that booth for hours, just staring at the table. I put a hand to my mouth to muffle the uncontrollable sobs that erupted from my mouth. The diner staff looked at me, no longer with fear and nervousness, but with pity.
I finally left when they told me they were closing.
Dedicated to Riana_Jannat23