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**
What I was doing only hit me just as we were driving into Long Beach.
The car journey had been fun and had taken my mind off of the fact that I’d left my family back in Huntington without telling them that I was going to be away for the night.
Despite the fact that it was night time, we drove with the windows rolled down as if the sun was pouring into the car, and our music was loudly blaring out. I was surprised by how comfortable I felt, but something told me this was going to be a pretty good night.
I only knew that we were going to yet another house party, but this one was in a nicer house in a nicer area this time. Ronnie had told me about how his friends in Long Beach were a lot wealthier than the ones he knew in Huntington. It made me question how he knew them, but I didn’t ask him. I decided just to enjoy myself.
He grinned over at me from where he was sat in the driver’s seat, reaching over to quickly ruffle my hair.
“Nearly there now, kid.” He announced cheerfully. “Tonight’s gonna be awesome.”
I grinned back at him, shifting in my seat as he drummed his fingers against the steering wheel along to the music.
“Where are we staying tonight?” I asked interestedly. “A motel?”
He shook his head. “I have a friend that lives around these parts. He’s away for the night so he said we could stay in his house.”
I nodded, though the smile slipped off of my face the slightest bit. Whether it was going to be a good night or not, I didn’t like the thought of being in a house alone with Ronnie. I was hoping that we’d spend so much time at the party that we wouldn’t get to actually go to the house.
He was right about it being in a much nicer area that where we usually went to parties. I studied the neighbourhood as we pulled into a street. They looked like the types of houses that everyone in the Avenged family lived in. From the outside, you could tell they were big, spacious and well looked after.
I waited to see which house was the one that the party was being held in, but it was pretty easy to tell. A big house halfway down the street had a few people stood on the front garden, socialising with drinks in their hands. I raised my eyebrows. It looked so civilised and not at all like the kind of party Ronnie would enjoy.
There was no furniture strewn across the lawn or boarded up windows. The grass was neatly cut and the outside of the house was clean and free of any graffiti.
“Whose house is this, anyway?” I raised my eyebrows, turning to Ronnie as he parked up.
“Just a friend of a friend’s.” He shrugged. “If truth be told, I could’ve taken you to a party like we normally go to, but I thought I’d take you to something more...you, seeing as we’re out of town. I wanted you to feel comfortable, didn’t I?”
“Something more me?” I questioned his wording.
He chuckled. “Your family has a lot of money, Midge. You can afford to live in these types of houses. You’ll get on with everyone just fine.”
Although I usually hated it when he went on about the types of houses my family lived in and the amount of money we had, I chose to ignore it and stepped out of car. The people stood on the front lawn didn’t acknowledge us as we walked up the garden path. I waited to see if Ronnie would knock on the door, but he just opened it and let us in himself.
The place was pretty much packed. Even though Ronnie had said it would be a different kind of party, I was immediately met by the smell of weed like always. However, I noticed as he pulled me into the living room that a lot more socialising was being done. Instead of people just sitting down and taking drugs, they were actually bothering to talk to each other and some were dancing along to the loud music.
Ronnie took my hand, seeing as they were so many people in the room. It was so big and seemed to lack a lot of furniture, that it was like someone had taken it and turned into a nightclub.
“So, who do you actually know out of these people?” I shouted over the music to Ronnie.
“Uh...” He frowned, biting his lip as his eyes scanned over the room, finally stopping at a group of people that were stood by a door leading into a back garden. “Those guys. Come on.”
I let him drag me over, watching as they all began to notice him and greet him. It was weird, but they just didn’t seem like his kind of people. They were all in their early twenties at least, and the type of people that just looked smart and wealthy. I was honestly starting to wonder just how he knew them.
“Hey, guys.” Ronnie greeted them all casually, at which they returned their greetings. “This is the friend I told you I was bringing along—Midge. Midge, this is Ellie, Katy, Mitchell, Danny, Chris and Seth.”
“Hey.” I smiled at them, sending them all a brief wave. They greeted me surprisingly enthusiastically, which was better than them being rude, I guess.
“You want a drink, Midge?” Ronnie asked me, turning to me and holding an arm around my shoulder.
I shrugged. “Sure.”
“Alright. I’ll be right back.” He nodded. “Guys, look after Midge while I get her a drink.”
He went to walk away, but one of the guys—Danny, I think it was—called after him.
“Hey, Ronnie, wait.” He said, stopping Ronnie in his tracks. “Did you bring our stuff? You know...that you promised?”
Ronnie glanced at me, and then back at him. “Of course I did.” He nodded. “But just wait a bit longer. I’ll give it to you later. I’m gonna hang out with the kid for a bit first, okay?”
I didn’t particularly appreciate being referred to as “the kid”, but I shrugged it off as Danny’s eyes flickered to me and he tilted his head, before sending a single nod Ronnie’s way.
I smiled at them all a little awkwardly as Ronnie walked off, hoping he wouldn’t be too long getting me a drink. I had absolutely no idea what to say to them, but thankfully, Ronnie came pushing through people and wandered back over to us only minutes later.
“There you go.” He handed me a cup. “Drink that up.”
I glanced down at the liquid unsurely, but everyone’s gazes seemed to be pinned on me. Instead of questioning what the drink actually was like I probably should’ve done, I simply raised the cup to my lips.
And began to gulp it down, suddenly hoping this night would pass by fast.
**
“Ronnie, hurry up. I’m tired and I feel weird.” I whined as Ronnie drunkenly laughed at my complaint, continuing to bend down and search for the house key.
It was around three AM. We’d left the party about forty minutes ago and began to walk to this house that we were meant to be staying in, considering we were both too drunk to drive. It turned out that this house we’d be spending the rest in the night in before we went home, was just like the houses Ronnie usually took me to back in Huntington.
He’d not mentioned that this neighbourhood was so far away from where the party had been.
“I’m trying.” He retorted a few moments later. “He said he’d put the key under the mat and it’s not there!”
I groaned as I tipped my head back and leant against the wall. I didn’t even care right now that I was completely uncomfortable in this neighbourhood—I just wanted to get inside and go to sleep.
The party had been a weird sort of haze for me that seemed to fly by. The duration of it was pretty much spent with Ronnie getting me drinks and talking to me, just like we usually did. He did, however, leave me for about ten minutes to go find Danny. I was guessing it had something to do with their stuff, but I wasn’t entirely sure, as Ronnie had refused to let me go with him.
“Found it!” He suddenly announced, laughing again and holding up a key. “It was in the plant pot.”
“Good.” I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest. “Now just unlock the door and let me inside.”
He did as I’d told him and unlocked the front door, allowing me to step inside before him. It was pretty cold and dark in there, just as I’d expected, but I didn’t even care. I just wanted to go to sleep.
Finding the stairs, I began to walk up them, feeling Ronnie follow closely behind me. I stopped at the top of the stairs—seeing as I didn’t know which room I’d actually be staying in—and he proceeded to lead me to the room right at the end.
It appeared to be pretty big. The first thing I noticed was the double bed, and as Ronnie kicked off his shoes, it became clear that we wouldn’t be sleeping in separate rooms like I’d hoped we would be.
Heaving a sigh, I walked further into the room and also proceeded to take my shoes off, not particularly thrilled with this idea in the slightest.
“Did you have a good night?” Ronnie asked me, ignoring my sigh.
“Sure.” I simply shrugged back at him, too tired to really answer with any more detail than that. “How do you actually know those guys, anyway? And what was that all about...the thing that Danny said? About the stuff?”
He seemed to pause for a minute, before shrugging. “I’ll be honest with you Midge...I know them because I get them their drugs. They’re college kids...and they’ve sort of made a habit of coming to me to get them stuff. I’m not bothered, seeing as it gets me money.”
It didn’t surprise me. I guess I’d sort of sussed that out myself without even realising it. Shrugging it off, I took my jacket off and crawled onto the bed.
“Whatever.” I yawned. “Goodnight.”
I pulled up the covers and proceeded to climb under, too tired to even feel weird about sleeping in some stranger’s bed. I was hoping Ronnie would turn off the light soon, as it was shining directly onto me, but he seemed to have other plans.
“Hey...wait...” He murmured, crawling over to where I was lying and hovering over me. He stared down at my face, wearing a smirk, and I immediately froze. “We don’t need to sleep just yet, do we?”
I opened my mouth, but only the tiniest squeak came out. Ronnie seemed to take this as some sort of invitation, as he chuckled deeply and leaned down to kiss me.
He didn’t even start out gently. He just went straight for it, forcefully pressing his lips to mine as I lay somewhat paralyzed beneath him. I didn’t kiss back, thankfully managing to get my hands out from under the covers and push his chest away. He parted from me, staring down at me with a confused expression.
“I...I’m real tired.” I weakly said. “I just wanna sleep.”
Immediately, his expression darkened and he shook his head, leaning down again.
“No, no...You’ve pushed me away once already, Midge.” He whispered in my ear. “I’m not being rejected a second time. We’re doing this. Now.”
And again, he kissed me, this time with even more force. I was quicker to react and push him away this time round, hoping I could build up some confidence to stand my ground.
“I thought I made it clear the first time.” I sternly said. “I don’t want to!”
He blinked at me for a moment, before narrowing his eyes. “Am I not making myself clear? I don’t care!”
His tone itself was enough to make me even more riddled with fear, and I felt like I couldn’t move again. As he began to lean back down, now moving his hands to the buttons on my shirt, I jolted upwards, accidentally smacking my head against his.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” He angrily spat, placing his hands on my shoulders and shoving me back down. “Now I swear to God, you better keep completely still. You’re not doing yourself any favours by struggling.”
I whimpered, tears appearing in my eyes as he pressed his body forcefully against mine, holding me down as he began to unbutton my shirt. I was trying my hardest to find a way out of this, but it seemed impossible, I was completely weak.
And this was all too familiar.
“Stop fucking crying!” He growled. “It’s completely unattractive.”
“Get off of me.” I sobbed. “Please just leave me alone.”
He ignored me and kissed my neck, his hands undoing the last button of my shirt and then moving to the button of my jeans. My body stiffened again. I couldn’t let this happen.
It was bringing back too much of a bad memory. One that I couldn’t bear to think about.
One that I couldn’t let myself relive.
But what could I do? There was no way I’d be able to defend myself against him, and it wasn’t like anyone would be able to hear me if I screamed.
I had pretty much no chance of getting out of this.
“Ronnie, please.” I begged again.
He glared at me down at me. “Shut up.”
I felt the button of my jeans come undone, and he moved his hand to the zipper.
And that’s where I made the mistake.
I reacted on instinct, raising my leg under the covers and managing to kick him hard enough that he fell back slightly. He seemed pretty shocked by my action, before his expression darkened yet again, and he crawled back over to me.
“I have had it with you!” He raised his voice. “What, you think you can just carry on leading me on like this and then not put out? Once was enough, Midge! It’s not happening again!”
“I’m not leading you on!” I cried back, my body shaking. “I haven’t intentionally given you that impression! You’re my friend!”
That just angered him even more. He did not like that one bit.
“Shut the fuck up.” He spat again, clenching his teeth and grabbing my face roughly in his hand. “You’ll be much worse off if you struggle, so I suggest you just keep quiet and still and not say another word. Got it?”
I said absolutely nothing.
“Got it?” He repeated, raising his voice again.
“No!”
And it was that one word that took it.
That one word that made him raise his hand in the air. I watched as only a moment later, it came flying down and smacked against my cheek. I winced immediately, tears appearing in my eyes as it stung.
And then he did it again, this time harder.
“Stop it.” I cried, desperately trying to shove him away.
Surprisingly, he did stop. I continued to lay there in complete fear as he climbed off of me, and then off of the bed, saying absolutely nothing.
Silently, he pulled his shoes back on and then walked towards the door, turning as he laid his hand on the doorknob.
“I mean it! I have fucking had it with you!” He shouted, repeating his earlier words with a look of pure disgust on his face as he stared me up and down.
And then he walked out of the room, slamming the door behind him. I heard his footsteps descending downstairs, and moments later, the front door opened and slammed shut again.
I didn’t know what to do. My body was shaking with fear. Unwanted memories were swimming around my head while my cheek stung from being smacked twice and my heart was beating at a surreal speed.
I could hear sobs leaving my lips, but I couldn’t feel anything except the emotional and physical pain that I was in. I wanted to go home, but there was no way I’d be able to call anyone and explain everything to them.
So all I could do was lay my head down, waiting for the tears to stop and the memories and pain to go away. Waiting for my eyes to shut and to fall asleep.
And hoping in that time that, he wouldn’t come back.