My knee bounces with anticipation under the table,
The weather outside looks dull and bleak again seemingly describing how I feel to the T,
It's autumn now,
November is crawling to an end,
Everyone always talks about how beautiful it is this time of year,
I always thought it was funny,
We think it's so beautiful when everything is dying,
It's still one of my favorite seasons nonetheless,
I wish I could go outside and throw leaves at you,
And laugh like we used to,
I'm staring at my phone screen with a straight face now,
But my mind is in a million different places,
I keep dreaming about you,
Maybe it's because even at three in the morning when all I want is to forget you,
You're still the last thing on my mind before my eyelids finally shut,
Why can I always remember the dreams so vividly,
When I want so badly to forget,
I'm always holding your hand,
But your always telling me to let go,
I always tell you..
No,
I can't let you go again,
It hurts me to much every single time,
You just look at me with sparkling eyes,
Eyes that always reminded me of autumn,
You wipe the tears from my cheeks,
And the smell of fabric softener and your cologne is all that's left when my eyes clear,
Maybe that's why it's hurting so bad this month,
You always kind of reminded me of autumn,
And I can still smell your cologne when I finally wakeup.