Ces: enjoy reading!
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Chapter 48 "Calm"
Third Person's POV
The room was quiet. So quiet that it's almost ear-deafening for Bill. He can still feel the intense gaze of Mabel at his back. He didn't look back. If he does, he felt like he lost. And this time, out of any time to be given to him, he doesn't intend to lose in this challenge. Finally, he stepped in with his light feet and closed the door with very gentle click and locked it. He felt himself shudder when he thought now that he's alone with a misunderstood person that he loves. It feels rather peculiar to see something destructive to be so beautiful and-- elegant.
He stand still. His once dull eyes, brighten at the peaceful sight of Dipper in his bed, staring idly at the ceiling. It appears that he doesn't even notice his presence inside the room. And Bill would like it that way.
Bill went to the other side, minding the blooming white lilies on his soft blue vase. He always had an interest in them for such an odd time. He sat at the folding chair with his legs close and hands shaking on his lap. Until now, Dipper haven't notice his presence.
He took a shaky breath in and out. He doesn't intend to start a conversation, he intends to let Dipper talk. And he will wait, until that happen.
But how much every minute pass, it only turns more into nerve wrecking moments. He tried, really. He tried looking at him, look at that dull yet peaceful look on his face yet his eyes shows emptiness of the void. It only pains him more and how he wishes to let God do his work and make Dipper speak. Just a small word. Just a tiny, itsy-bitsy, little syllable slip out from his small mouth.
"Who's there?" Finally, he was answered.
And those hollow eyes finally laid on his golden honey-like eyes. For some odd reason, there was a small shift on his eyes and chest. Dipper stare at him with a straight face with his lips parted slightly and Bill controlling himself to not grab him now and kiss him. He mentally slapped himself and answered.
"It's me, Pine Tree--" Dipper felt something shift again, "it's Bill."
He squinted his eyes, can't see properly without his glasses. But he can make up of the features of his face. He felt himself let out a dreamy sigh, as if so used of memorizing the lines of this man's gorgeous face. He tried to move his hand but noticed there are still restraints stopping him. He stared at it and muttered:
"Oh."
Bill blinked and noticed this. He wasn't sure if this is alright, letting him go from this chains. But he think of it in a good way, he felt like releasing a very dangerous monster from its cell. He felt his lips tug in a smile by that silly thought. He released the leather from Dipper's wrists. He held them shakingly, soothing them. Bill muttered an excuse and went to pull off the blanket to see his slender feet, so pale.
Bill noticed himself swallow. He narrowed his eyes away for a second then back at it again. Come now, Bill, stop it. He scolded himself. He untied the restraints, his fingers brushing on his ankles. His feet cold and slender. His face came to red, thinking how good it will be if he can touch those or so stimulate the other with just kissing and licking from his feet. He blinked his way out of that fantasy, punching himself in the gut for discipline.
He smiled and turned to Dipper's way, "I---"
He came to a halt.
Dipper was sitting upright and staring at him intently too. With those eyes once hollow are now has some kind of weird mix of gaze on it. It sends shivers on Bill's spine that he felt himself shut up.
The brunet narrowed his eyes away, as if embarrassed, "thank you.." he muttered, sliding his fingers slowly on his feet.
Bill only nodded and sat back.
Dipper placed his head on his knees, his face on him, "what are you doing here?" He muttered, words rather not understandable.
"An honest answer?" Bill whispered, he grins.
Dipper bites his lower lip, thinking. And Bill begged for God again to let this temptations stop right now or else he'll lose himself in the middle of this pep talk. However, to make his situation worse, Dipper noticed his uneasiness. This struck him worried.
"I'm sorry.. Did I say something wrong?" He mumbled, scared.
Bill flinched at that suddenly. He panicked, waving his hands in front of him, "oh-- oh no no!" He said, "you didn't do anything wrong, I promise." He smiled clumsily. The one who has fault here is definitely him, why does he have to be this way?
"Are you sure?" The other whispered, so quiet that it almost meant for it as a secret.
He nodded, grabbing his hand to stop it from holding his'. "Definitely." He answered, he looked around, trying to find of a topic, "you.. you seem quiet today." He hesitantly stated.
Dipper only looks down, his hands on the blanket. He wasn't sure what expression he's wearing right now. He doesn't know how to feel right now. He knows he should be screaming, even if this person is someone related to him. However when he told him his name. He was-- okay. Just that. Now, he isn't sure what to answer.
He fiddle his fingers, "I-I don't know why--" He stammered, nervous. His hands clenched on the sheet covering his legs, "i'm confused as you are.." he muttered.
Bill smiled apologetically at that. "It's alright, I understand." He said.
Dipper stared at him. He wasn't sure what to do now. Although he is sure that he'll negotiate later on, telling him to calm down and meet the others, to talk to his sister. It's not like he's doing it on purpose. As if everything how he react right now has a switch. And now, when Bill said his name. An unknown switch flipped on and because of that switch, he is like this now.
His hand fidgeted.
"I know this is a stupid question but how are you, Pine Tree?" Bill asked, concerned.
"Weird.." Dipper muttered, showing a light smile on his face. That smile made Bill happier than he can ever be this month. He automatically returned the smile with one his sweetest one he can muster at this moment, "t-that's fine! It'll be really weird at first.." His voice slowly turned into whisper noticing that he yelled.
Dipper smiled more at that. For some odd reason, he think thats their roles are switched now. He feels more like Bill, who can be calm, can be cool. He feels oddly like him today. And for what he is observing now, Bill looks like him. A wreck. He chuckled at that. Which made Bill melt at that sound, oh God how much I missed that.. He blushed.
"It's a good kind of weird, though.." Dipper followed, sighing.
"That's good." Bill said, smiling.
Dipper gave him a hesitant smile.
"Hey, Pine Tree.." The blond whispered, slowly. Dipper looked at him, as if, he wasn't already. This made Bill nervous a bit, he ran his hand at the back of his neck and said, "i'm sorry."
"What for?" Dipper asked, but deep in his mind, he knows why.
Bill clenched his jaw, forcingly himself not to shout. "For doing something.. that I know it's traumatizing to you-- I-I didn't know what was I thinking.. I snapped it wasn't like me--"
"It really wasn't you."
He felt more guilty, "I-I won't do anything like that anymore-- so please--" He looked at him, eye to eye.
"Please come back."
Dipper softens. For once, his mind didn't told him what to. For once, his heart wasn't screaming at him. For once, he felt he's in control to what's going to happen next.
With this new found confidence, he lift his hand and asked:
"Place your hand on mine." He whispered, softly.
Bill flinched, unsure of what's happening. He sweat dropped, "a-are you sure? You'll get--"
"Do what I say, Bill." Dipper pressed with one cheek puffed.
With that response, Bill has no choice but to follow. He hesitantly lift his hand and placed it on top of his'. But still not landed on Dipper's palm. He's shaken, he feels like if he place it, Dipper will turn hysterical again. His chest thumped. I don't want to hear his screams. Bill thought, terrified.
"Bill, look at me." Dipper ordered.
Bill complied and looked at his warm eyes.
"Do you trust me?"
"I do." Bill answered without any hesitance.
Dipper smiled at that, "then please.." He whispered.
Bill swallowed, not breaking eye contact and let his hand landed on the other's palm. He can feel Dipper shake and that made him shaken too, he wanted to move away but Dipper didn't let him, "j-just let it be!" He exclaimed, "I-I'm getting used to it.." He said. Bill nodded and just placed his hand there.
"Why are you doing this?" Bill asked.
Dipper let out a shaky laugh. Why do I, huh? He forced his fingers to move and enterwined them to Bill's fingers. Bill froze at the action and stared at it wide eyed. Dipper is still shaking but didn't move away.
He met his eyes, "I don't want to be afraid anymore."
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Ces: *epic ending scene* tbh i wanted them to have an forehead touch but ehhhhhhh-- take things slowlyyyy
Ya'll begging and i feel so soft, so i give u this cake
Words: 1637