I jerk awake sweat pouring down my forehead and into my wide panic filled eyes. I bury my face into my hands groaning aloud with annoyance, why the hell did that nightmare show up again?! Huffing I toss the covers off and stagger to the bathroom for yet another cold shower. The cold water pours from the shower head and tumbles down my body, I stand underneath the spray for a couple minutes allowing the icy water to wake me up.
I slap my hands against the cold stones of the shower as the icy water runs down my back. My fingers curl into fists, frustration running heavily through my veins, why the hell did it show up again?! I draw my fist back my teeth grinding together and my eyes wild with anger.
"Why?!" My fist connects with the stones.
"Why?!" I draw back, my throbbing fist, anger provoking my actions, it hits the stones for a second time.
I draw back, again, my fist painfully throbbing,"Why??!" I lean into this punch my entire weight behind it as it connects with the stones. Several droplets of blood spray through the air along with the sound of cracking bones, I jerk back hissing with pain and quickly turn off the water.
"Just having a wrapped up fist will provoke Erwin to figure out what I'm so torn up about." I growl angrily underneath my breath. I don't even bother making sure it stops bleeding before bandaging it, taking a roll of bandages I quickly wrap up my knuckles then change into a clean uniform.
My footfalls echo loudly through the hallways, I don't even care if I wake up anyone all I want is to get to the courtyard and out of this building.
"Goddamned brain, fucking with me. I swear to fuck." I growl in between my teeth, my bandaged fist clenching tightly,"Fucking shit screwing with me. Goddamn."
I round a corner and standing there his arms loaded with papers is Erwin. Concern and amusement lights his pale blue eyes,"Up early again, Sakura?"
I hiss in between my clenched teeth,"Yes, problem?"
He raises an eyebrow,"No, yet I'm still curious as to why you've been waking early."
"Well, get rid of your damned curiosity."
"Why are you so angry?"
I narrow my eyes and shove past him,"Just leave me alone, Erwin." I growl as I pass him up.
His eyes flicker down to my injured hand,"Now your hand is bandaged, although it wasn't yesterday, so enlighten me, what's wrong?"
I ignore him and stalk down the hallway anger clouding my facial features and my fists remained tightly clenched at my sides,"You know you can tell me anything right?" Erwin says from behind me.
I turn toward him,"Some secrets need to remain secrets, Erwin."
"I need to know if you're even harming yourself." He gestures at my hand,"What could have angered you so much that you would have harmed yourself?"
"You don't need to know."
"Yes I do."
I slam my hand against the wall, my breathing labored,"No! You fucking don't!"
His eyes widen,"Sakura, I-"
"Fucking save it." I raise my hand toward him so he can clearly see the bloodied bandages,"I don't need your pathetic sympathy."
If his eyes could widen anymore they would, his mouth falls open and he looks genuinely shocked. I huff and turn on my heel,"This is none of your business, Erwin, so stay out of it." I lean forward and sprint away from him frustrated tears streaming down my cheeks.
Why am I running? Wasn't he just trying to help? I grit my teeth and take a deep shaky breath to clear my head. Wiping away my tears with my forearm I shoulder open the HQ doors and stand in the warm morning sunlight. It doesn't matter if he was trying to help or not, he would most likely laugh at me for being so torn up about a dream. I hop down the steps taking them three at a time with ease, hitting the grass I don't hesitate to sprint for the woods.
I dodge the trees whirling around them and hopping over bushes. I just need to get away, farther and farther I sprinted sweat pouring down my face and my breathing ragged. Would Erwin even understand? No, no he wouldn't. I take another deep breath as I go to hop over another bush but, my foot slips. A strangled gasp escapes my lips as I fall to the side my arms flail helplessly through the air. My back connects heavily against a rock sending sharp sparks of pain all through my body. I lay there desperately trying to catch my breath while staring at the blue sky above me.
'Why don't I just stay right here? Like this?'
My eyes begin to slip closed, black dots dancing across my vision. No! I snap my eyes open and with a struggling breath shove myself to my feet. I need to get back to HQ to continue my training, to keep my promise. I gaze down at the scar over my left hand then with pure confidence walk back the way I came.
-Erwin's POV-
She slaps her hand against the wall, anger rolling off of her in waves and her shoulders shake with each labored breath she takes,"No!" She yells,"You fucking don't!"
Nothing but honest concern runs through my veins,"Sakura, I-"
She straightens her back, her eyes locked on me with cold fury burning brightly in the back of her emerald green eyes, she stares at me,"Fucking save it." She growls and raises her hand so I can clearly see her bloodied bandage,"I don't need your pathetic sympathy."
My breath hitches in my throat and every time I blink I see her standing there, fires roaring around her body and the same cold fury lighting her eyes. Her fathers cloak flaps around her body in the gentle breeze, her shoulders are tense, yet no tears are shed. I shake my head, I can't be marveling in memories! Especially memories that are almost five years old, she turns her back to me.
"This is none of your business, Erwin, so stay out of it."
I don't even have a chance to reply before she full out sprints down the hallway. My heart is thundering loudly in my ears as I stare at her retreating back; what did I do? I slowly turn around and continue to walk to my office, the entire way I can't stop hearing her words, can't stop seeing her cold eyes. What is it that she is so desperate to hide?
I exhale sharply out of my nose then gently push the door open with the toe of my boot. My office is completely empty, the bright and cheerful morning light shining through the wide paned windows that overlook the courtyard.
'She'll be heading for the training grounds, right? So, maybe, I can catch a glimpse of her out my windows.'
I purse my lips and drop my stack of newly found paperwork on my desk as I pass it up. Leaning against the window sill I keep my eyes locked on the front steps of the HQ. After just a couple more seconds the doors bang open and the familiar shock of pitch black hair appears. She doesn't stop to look around, no, she doesn't even look at the training grounds entrance. She easily takes the steps three at a time and almost as soon as her feet touches the plush green grass of the courtyard; she darts for the woods.
"What?" My eyes widen as I watch her back disappear in the dense undergrowth of the forest. I lean forward and press my hand against the cool glass, my eyes darting around the perimeter of the courtyard, yet no evidence of her stepping out of the woods is to be seen.
"Are you worried about her, Erwin?" I jerk around at the sound of Hanji's voice. She's leaning casually against the door frame, her arms folded across her chest and the sun reflecting off of her glasses.
"Hanji! When did you get here?"
She shrugs and strides into the room,"Actually I just got here a couple minutes ago."
"I still didn't expect you to arrive on such short notice."
She pushes the door shut with the heel of her boot and walks across the room to take a seat across from me,"Stop trying to change the subject."
"I'm not."
"Yes you are. It's clear that you don't want to talk about Sakura."
"I have other things to worry about."
"Like the expedition? We have one week to get this paperwork done, that is plenty of time."
"This expedition takes a lot of preparation."
She sighs,"Humanity's second strongest soldier is running blindly through the woods right now and you are worried about that?"
"Second strongest soldier?" I whisper.
"You didn't go watch her train did you?"
I sigh and look down at my desk,"She asked me not to.."
"Well let me inform you of something," she leans forward,"When she is using the maneuver gear you can barely see her because she moves so quickly. The strength that she puts into each strike is absolutely extraordinary, each strike is precise and deep. When I say deep, I mean when she hit the Titan dummies her strikes went past the foam and into the wood."
The leather of my chair meets my back,"Only Levi was ever to be able to get his strikes that deep."
"Exactly."
"Well, anyway I need to get some paperwork done and so do you."
"You are training her today, right? In maneuvering gear?"
I sigh knowing she is not going to let this slide,"Yes, I am."
"Well, while you are training her make sure you keep your eyes on her. If you don't," She smirks,"You'll miss her."
"Alright fine,"I place my head in my hands and gently massage my temples,"I will make sure I keep track of her."
She gives me a wicked grin,"That's what I'm looking for!"
I roll my eyes,"Anyway,"I sit up and point at the stack of paperwork,"the top half is yours to worry about."
She groans loudly,"Damned paperwork." She reaches forward and take the top half into her arms.
"I want that all done by Friday."
She groans again,"You are really starting to irk me."
"It happens to be in the job description." I reply with a smirk.
She shoots me a playful glare,"I knew I should have marked that out.."
I wave my hand at the door,"Goodbye, Hanji."
She walks toward the door, juggling paperwork back and forth in her hands. Pulling open the door she looks at me over her shoulder,"I brought what you asked for by the way."
I nod my head,"I would expect nonetheless from you."
She smirks and walks out of my office muttering unhappy curses underneath her breath about the amount of paperwork she has to do. Once I am for sure that she is gone to her own duties, I stand up and fold my arms over my chest. My eyes gaze out the window at the swaying treetops. Hanji made it seem as if Sakura was just as fast as the most experienced of soldiers if not faster. Of course I knew from the beginning that she would make an excellent soldier, yet I don't like the thought of her being on this expedition or any expedition for that matter. The survival rate of new soldiers is extremely low and, for the first time, I have to admit I don't know what would become of me if she did die.
-Sakura's POV-
A sigh escapes my lips as I stand in front of the floor length mirror in my room. My hair is tangled and several scratches are prominent on my cheeks and forehead, leaves are sticking to my uniform and twigs are sticking out of my hair. 'I can't exactly show up for training looking like this.' With another sigh I run a brush through my hair and change into a new uniform. I snatch a cloak from my wardrobe and throw it on quickly as well as my maneuver gear.
Nodding my head with satisfaction I leave my room and make my way to Erwin's office. I raise my uninjured knuckles and gently knock them against the wood of Erwin's door.
"Come in." The muffled response leaks through the door.
I take a deep breath and gently push the door open,"Commander." I quickly say and salute him.
His eyes are locked on a document in front of him, his pen taps against the wood of his desk as his eyes run delicately over every word as if he is soaking each word in with extreme delicacy. The silence that stretches between us is not awkward, but comfortable; my eyes remain locked on his face and I can't seem to find a single flaw in his features, he just seems perfect to me. I silently scold myself, I can't have a relationship with a higher up! It is one of the most upheld rules in the military and to breach this rule would result in my instant transferring of military branches. Most likely into the Military Police and I can barely stand those spineless cowards; the way they cower within Wall Sina relying completely on the Survey Corps to get the harder and more terrifying jobs done.
"I see you brought your maneuver gear with you." Erwin's voice slices through my overly crowed mind.
"You did ask me to, if I remember correctly."
A small smile tugs at his lips,"The way you listen to orders without a moments hesitation is spectacular."
I furrow my brow,"Sir?" Confusion laces my words.
He chuckles and scribbles something onto the document before sitting up and looking at my face,"It's nothing, really, just ignore the previous statement." His eyes run over me taking in every single ounce of my being.
I gulp and slowly relax my salute,"Whatever you say..." I whisper uncertainly.
He stands up and walks around his desk to stand in front of me,"I have a couple of errands to run that happen to regard the upcoming expedition this morning, and you will be accompanying me into town."
Stacks upon stacks of confusion settles in my mind,"Um...Erwin aren't you-"
He waves his hand mindlessly in the air,"Yes I know I'm supposed to be training you but, this is part of your training."
"Now I really am lost.."
He waves a single finger in my face,"You see, with your father having trained you when you were little, you happen to be more advanced in the mechanics of maneuvering gear than an average soldier would be." He grins,"So for me to be able to create a perfect training schedule that fits around your abilities. I need to know how well you work with the maneuvering gear and for that to become accomplished, you will be accompanying me into town."
"Won't we be taking horses into town?"
"No," he pats my head,"We will be using our maneuvering gear to get where we need to go."
He turns around and begins stacking up documents and sliding them, carefully, into a backpack,"I need you to follow me in the woods so you don't get lost." He puts the backpack onto his shoulders and walks past me. I follow closely behind him as we walk through the halls of the HQ and into the early afternoon sunlight. He leads me to the far corner of the courtyard and places a hand on my shoulder.
"Make sure you follow me because if you don't you could easily get lost."
I nod my head in understanding,"I will follow you until the end, Erwin." I glance up at him and upon seeing a kind smile dance across his face an unknown emotion of my own swells in my chest; causing a smile of my own to glisten up at him.
"Alright," he says and grabs hold of his hand grips, I follow his lead and take up my own,"Let's go!"
He leaps into the air and grapples into the trees with me directly behind him. I pick up the speed so I am swinging from tree to tree next to him, he glances at me out of the corner of his eye and pulls the triggers, picking up his own speed. I narrows my eyes and spin around a tree making sure I stay close to him, he hooks onto the upper branches of the trees and flips up, high into the air. 'What is he doing?' I furrow my brow and continue to follow him from the security of the trees. 'Its almost like he is speeding up purposely so I can't stay caught up with him.' He drops back down into the canopy of leaves and pulls the triggers launching himself forward with twice as much speed as he was using before. I grit my teeth angrily.
"You are not losing me that easily, old man!" I yell into the wind and pull on the triggers, no longer holding back I flip, spin, and dart around trees and branches. Within mere seconds I am caught up to Erwin who looks back at me with surprised filled eyes. I smirk and launch myself above him, keeping my eyes on his body I follow every move he makes with simple ease. I look up at the sky furrowing my brow I look back in the direction of the HQ. We have been traveling in the same general direction since we left HQ so, if I continue to go in this direction, I should reach the town Erwin spoke of before Erwin has a chance to. I flip forward and drop down in front of Erwin, pulling the triggers I am yanked forward and ahead of Erwin. With a smirk I pick up the speed to the point that every tree is nothing but a blinding blur of greens and browns. I spin around a rather large tree and that's when I see it the silhouette of buildings within the confinement of the forest. I grin and make my way toward the buildings knowing that I will definitely reach the town before Erwin does. I hook onto a brown-shingled roof and gracefully flip onto it. Throwing my fist into the air I whoop with triumph,"That's right old man!" I grin madly and look at the woods,"Don't underestimate me!"
A couple minutes later he lands on the building next to me,"What took you so long?" I ask playfully.
He looks up at me and a gasp of surprise escapes me lips. His eyes are wide and filled with pure wonder and awe while a simple, yet warm, smile spreads across his face.
"Well, it is indeed obvious that you are one of the fastest soldiers we have within our regimen."
I can feel my cheeks warming up,"It's just the result of continuous training.." I mutter underneath my breath.
Erwin smiles at me,"Now since we happen to be in town," he leaps off the building onto the street level,"Let's go finish up my errands shall we?" I nod my head in agreement and leap off the building to land next to him.
"Don't get lost here either, okay?" He pats my head and his grin broadens,"It would be a pain to have to search for you before I even have the chance to put your skills to the test."
I grit my teeth,"Stop treating me like a fucking child." I smack his hand off my head and keep my eyes forward,"I am a damned soldier aren't I? Having endured two and a half years of 'tough' training, the least you could do is at least acknowledge the fact I have grown up, at least a little bit anyway."
I can feel his eyes burning into the side of my head yet I dare not look at him. He sighs and begins to walk into town, without another word spoken between us, we drop off his paperwork to a squad leader in the Military Police and begin to make our way back to the outskirts of town.
"I have heard that you happen to be rather strong when it comes to striking titans."
I glance up at his impassive face,"Well, I try my best."
He nods his head,"We have Titan dummies hidden in the forest- almost exactly like the ones you encountered during you training- I will lead you to their positions and you will strike them just like you would a regular Titan."
I nod my head,"Understood."
He turns toward me finally meeting my eyes,"We won't be traveling at the same pace that we did to get here." He picks up his hand grips,"So there is no need to go as fast as you can."
I nod my head again and take up my own hand grips, he gives me a once over, nodding his head, with almost a sense of approval, he grapples into the trees. I follow behind him no longer feeling the need to be beside him or to parade around happily in the air.
It was indeed very irrational to say what I did to him; it was so disrespectful that I honestly wouldn't be surprised if he put me on suspension. I cringe at the thought, maybe I could apologize? Would he even accept my apology, and, if he did, would this awkwardness disappear? I look up at his back and sigh I can't stand this riff that is suddenly between us! It is absolutely unnerving. No, I need to stop, my training is way more important than my damned emotions.
Erwin whirls around a rather large tree and without a moments hesitation, I follow his lead. Just as I round the trunk an almost ghostly image of my father appears in front of me. Panic and fear pounds through my veins setting my body on a suspenseful edge. I gape at the ghostly image that glares at me, my body begins to tremble fear gripping my mind.
"You aren't fast enough, Sakura."
His voice booms painfully loud in my mind, I flinch and suppress a scream as the maneuvering gear jerks me through the ghostly image. As soon as my body comes in contact with the image it vaporizes and disappears from sight. I spin around in the air, my eyes locked on place where I saw the image and I listen to the sound of my thundering heartbeat. The nightmare is even affecting me during times when I am awake? This is totally getting out of hand! I really need to get a grip! I shake my head in aggravation and turn back around just in time to see Erwin land on a thick branch. I angle my body in that direction and grapple onto the branch. Right when my feet is about to land solidly on the branch another ghostly image of my father materializes directly in front of me. His hand lashes out and tangles itself in my hair, holding me mere centimeters above the bark. His lip curls in pure annoyance and his eyes shine brightly with disappointment.
"You didn't train hard enough, Sakura."
His ice cold voice sends shivers of pure fear down my spine, he shoves me backward sending me falling backwards through the air. I squeeze my eyes shut, no, this can't be happening! I can no longer suppress the scream that tears up my throat and ripples through the air. I didn't even get to find out when the scream would end because unconsciousness grabs my mind and yanks me into their cold clutches.
--A/N--
I know this is overdue I meant to upload this last Friday, but I ended up getting grounded and got my phone taken away from me. So I hope the length of this chapter makes up for the late update?
Don't forget to vote, comment and fan!!