Fight for Love (Attack on Titan/SnK fan fiction)

Fight for Love: Chapter 10

I jerk awake sweat pouring down my forehead and into my wide panic filled eyes. I bury my face into my hands groaning aloud with annoyance, why the hell did that nightmare show up again?! Huffing I toss the covers off and stagger to the bathroom for yet another cold shower. The cold water pours from the shower head and tumbles down my body, I stand underneath the spray for a couple minutes allowing the icy water to wake me up.
I slap my hands against the cold stones of the shower as the icy water runs down my back. My fingers curl into fists, frustration running heavily through my veins, why the hell did it show up again?! I draw my fist back my teeth grinding together and my eyes wild with anger.
"Why?!" My fist connects with the stones.
"Why?!" I draw back, my throbbing fist, anger provoking my actions, it hits the stones for a second time.
I draw back, again, my fist painfully throbbing,"Why??!" I lean into this punch my entire weight behind it as it connects with the stones. Several droplets of blood spray through the air along with the sound of cracking bones, I jerk back hissing with pain and quickly turn off the water.
"Just having a wrapped up fist will provoke Erwin to figure out what I'm so torn up about." I growl angrily underneath my breath. I don't even bother making sure it stops bleeding before bandaging it, taking a roll of bandages I quickly wrap up my knuckles then change into a clean uniform.
My footfalls echo loudly through the hallways, I don't even care if I wake up anyone all I want is to get to the courtyard and out of this building.
"Goddamned brain, fucking with me. I swear to fuck." I growl in between my teeth, my bandaged fist clenching tightly,"Fucking shit screwing with me. Goddamn."
I round a corner and standing there his arms loaded with papers is Erwin. Concern and amusement lights his pale blue eyes,"Up early again, Sakura?"
I hiss in between my clenched teeth,"Yes, problem?"
He raises an eyebrow,"No, yet I'm still curious as to why you've been waking early."
"Well, get rid of your damned curiosity."
"Why are you so angry?"
I narrow my eyes and shove past him,"Just leave me alone, Erwin." I growl as I pass him up.
His eyes flicker down to my injured hand,"Now your hand is bandaged, although it wasn't yesterday, so enlighten me, what's wrong?"
I ignore him and stalk down the hallway anger clouding my facial features and my fists remained tightly clenched at my sides,"You know you can tell me anything right?" Erwin says from behind me.
I turn toward him,"Some secrets need to remain secrets, Erwin."
"I need to know if you're even harming yourself." He gestures at my hand,"What could have angered you so much that you would have harmed yourself?"
"You don't need to know."
"Yes I do."
I slam my hand against the wall, my breathing labored,"No! You fucking don't!"
His eyes widen,"Sakura, I-"
"Fucking save it." I raise my hand toward him so he can clearly see the bloodied bandages,"I don't need your pathetic sympathy."
If his eyes could widen anymore they would, his mouth falls open and he looks genuinely shocked. I huff and turn on my heel,"This is none of your business, Erwin, so stay out of it." I lean forward and sprint away from him frustrated tears streaming down my cheeks.
Why am I running? Wasn't he just trying to help? I grit my teeth and take a deep shaky breath to clear my head. Wiping away my tears with my forearm I shoulder open the HQ doors and stand in the warm morning sunlight. It doesn't matter if he was trying to help or not, he would most likely laugh at me for being so torn up about a dream. I hop down the steps taking them three at a time with ease, hitting the grass I don't hesitate to sprint for the woods.
I dodge the trees whirling around them and hopping over bushes. I just need to get away, farther and farther I sprinted sweat pouring down my face and my breathing ragged. Would Erwin even understand? No, no he wouldn't. I take another deep breath as I go to hop over another bush but, my foot slips. A strangled gasp escapes my lips as I fall to the side my arms flail helplessly through the air. My back connects heavily against a rock sending sharp sparks of pain all through my body. I lay there desperately trying to catch my breath while staring at the blue sky above me.
'Why don't I just stay right here? Like this?'
My eyes begin to slip closed, black dots dancing across my vision. No! I snap my eyes open and with a struggling breath shove myself to my feet. I need to get back to HQ to continue my training, to keep my promise. I gaze down at the scar over my left hand then with pure confidence walk back the way I came.