"Oh, grow up Standall." Justin pushes me playfully.
I told him about how upset I was about Matt.
"Justin."
"Come on dude. Grow up." Then he walked away to be with his girlfriend. Of course. I knew I can't trust anyone with anything.
Homework today was hell. Every class. Yesterday's that I didn't finish.
"Why didn't you do your homework? You have no excuse, Alex." Basically all the teachers told me.
I do have an excuse, but it's hard to explain.
What do I say?
"Yeah, my best friend was just killed in an accident and I'm depressed as fuck so I can't focus on anything."?
They'd tell my mom, because of everything with Hannah, then my mom would get pissed at me.
I know I seem overdramatic. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I find myself saying that a lot. I find myself thinking about dark stuff like I used to. I wish it would stop, but it doesn't, it won't.
I shiver on my bed. I feel numb. And there's nothing I can do.
All the pain in my life is starting to catch up to me again. I'm losing the battle.
I sit up on my bed, looking at myself in the mirror. Face scarred.
I look down at my feet then back up again.
Tonight.
Tonight, you win.
(A/n: OH SHITTTTTT SORRY ITS SHORT again I didn't know how to write and what to write so here. I'll probably update once more tonight but I have a track meet tomorrow an ours today was cancelled. I promise the next chapters will be longer. Bye for right now :) )