*Molly's POV*
As quickly as I can I race across the newly formed battle field up to the gates of Erebor. I tie my hair up to keep from my face and glance over my shoulder seeing the Orc army fighting against the Dwarves and Elves. My eyes turn upward as I shout "Fili! Kili! Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Balin!" But no one answers.
"Anyone?!" I nearly scream.
After a few moments the ladder falls down and there is Fili and Kili looking "I knew you couldn't stay away." the dark haired brother laughs.
Fili motions "Come on! Hurry before the Orcs break through."
I smirk and quickly climb up to the top and am helped up by the brothers. I look around and don't see the dwarves. "Where is everyone?" Kili motions over the other side. I peer down seeing everyone sitting on the steps of stone dressed in their armor.
"Why aren't you fighting?" I ask.
Kili shakes his head "Thorin, he told us to stand back. He has went into the dark parts of Erebor. He's been there for a long time."
I nod and walk past the brothers and start down the stairs.
"Molly!" Fili calls going after me. The rest of the company looks up and Dwalin uncrosses his arms and they seem a little shocked I'm here.
"Molly, stop!" Fili calls again.
I keep walking away hearing the dwarves question.
"What is she doing? Where is she going?" Gloin asks.
"Nori shrugs "I don't know."
"She should be heading back to the Shire!" Ori excalims.
"I'm going to see Thorin." I say as I continue walking.
The company follows "What?! No! You can't. If you go down there and he snaps you'll be a goner for sure!" Bofur says trying to catch up to me.
I shake my head "He won't hurt me, I know he won't."
Balin grabs my shoulder "You can not go! He's dangerous."
I stop and whip around looking at them all. "I'm not leaving him!" I snap.
They all stop and Balin lets me go as they stare at me. I shake my head "I won't do it. I won't! I left him already once. I'm not going to do it again."
The company shifts uncomfortably and I shake my head "He is my friend....and I know that if it were me he would do the same."
They all look sorrowful and stay silent. I smile and grip Balin's shoulder "And I know that I would still be here if it were anyone of you."
With a smile I look at them all and they seem to smile a little more. I nod "But you must trust me. You must let me do this."
They look to one another and then to me and Balin nods "We trust you lass. We'll be here if you need us."
I nod "I will." and I turn away and run into the darkness.
---
I had made it to the steps leading straight up to the throne room. I could hear a voice up there. It sounds haunting, like a ghostly voice and it scares me. My eyes look up into the darkness where the whispers echo from. Before I even take the first step I stop. The fear growing inside of me ceases all movement. I pull back and step away from the darkness and sit down on the bottom step. Sitting there I think about what I would say or what would happen. Would he shout at me? Curse my name? Or worse, would he kill me?
Hearing the sound of footsteps I look up to see Fili sit right next to me. I try to offer him a smile but I suppose I didn't form much of one.
He is hesitant sitting there quietly and awkwardly shifting once in a while. Luckily he speaks after a moment "You are probably the most fearless human girl I know."
I give a slight smile and then he chuckles "Well, your the only human girl I know."
Both of us laugh for a moment but then it fades. I feel guilt and despair and I look down shaking my head not looking at him. I stare at my feet and feel my eyes water but hold the tears.
"I'm not...fearless...."
He doesn't speak but watches me sympathetically as I begin unraveling. I slightly scoff and my voice shakes and I wring my hands "I'm terrified....I'm always-I'm always terrified.I act like I know what I'm doing but I don't I-"
From the corner of my eye I can see him giving me his familiar sympathetic look. I blink and look up "I mean I don't.....I don't know how to get home, I don't know rather to fight or flee, or how to save Thorin-I don't know, I DON'T KNOW!" I choke out in an almost sob and look down. I sniff and clear my throat as Fili rests an arm over my back.
"Why am I always crying? I am so SICK of crying!" I growl and clutch onto the necklace Thorin gave me. The only light that I seemed left to have. Fili takes my hand holding it in his "I know you think that there is no hope. And honestly it looks a lot like that. But, it also did in the beginning of this journey. But you knew that we could do it. You gave us hope Molly. You gave us a chance." He turns my cheek to him looking deep in my eyes "You can do this."
"But I'm so scared."
The dwarf looks back at the stairs to the throne room then nods "And so is he." I look at the steps and then to Fili as he nods. Slowly I stand and begin making my way up the steps alone. Each step my heart beats faster and louder in my ears. My hands are sweaty and I swallow feeling the tightness in my throat. Once I reach the top I freeze seeing Dwalin walking up towards Thorin who sits on his throne. I slink back into the shadows and listen.
"Since when do we forsake our own people? Thorin, they are dying out there." Thorin looks at him but it's like he can't see "There are halls beneath halls within this mountain - places we can fortify.....Shore up, make safe! Yes..."
I can see Dwalins look of anger and confusion. I shake my head seeing how much worse Thorin's state of mind is. I hide behind a pillar and listen as close as I can. Thorin slowly stands "...Yes - that is it. We must move the gold further underground - to safety!"
Thorin begins walking away, but Dwalin angrily calls out to him "Did you not hear me?! Dain is surrounded! They're being slaughtered, Thorin."
I walk to the next pillar and continue to watch them and listen. Thorin then hisses "Many die in war. Life is cheap. But a treasure such as this cannot be counted in lives lost. It is worth all the blood we can spend!"
I think about the battle and can only imagine how much worse it has gotten. "You sit here in these vast halls, with a crown upon your head, and yet you are lesser now than you have ever been." Dwalin says just above a whisper.
Thorin blinks a few seconds and turns away but then draws his sword out and lazily swinging out "I AM YOUR KING!" As he drops it Dwalin nods "You were always my king. You used to know that once." Dwalin bows his head in sorrow "You cannot see that you have become."
Thorin looks sad and shakes his head "Go! Get out...before I kill you."
I cover my mouth and then lean against the pillar hearing this. Shocked by his words. How could he? How could he say or even think such a thing?! After a few seconds I hear Dwalin leave and then silence. Now is my chance and I have to take it. Taking a breath I shake my head sucking it up. I don't need to cry nor do I want to. I'm tired of crying. In this moment I have to be strong not only for myself, but for Thorin. I slowly emerge and begin walking up to Thorin. His back is turned and hand rested on the throne. As I'm only five feet from him I stop. It's silent and I want to say something but no words come.
"You..." he mumbles.
I freeze as he keeps his back towards me "Why are you here?"
I breathe out shakily "I-I-I....I couldn't just....I couldn't leave things like they were."
He still keeps his back to me "I wanted to make sure that y-you were alright."
I stop speaking and Thorin see s to chuckle sadly "If I was alright...?" he turns around facing me.
"Why?"
I swallow seeing his piercing eyes that are so cold and unfamiliar. I open my mouth to speak only to breathe out shakily. I look down and shake my head "Y-your my friend....I care about you. That's why I-" he cuts me off.
"The Arkenstone. Why did you say that you gave Bilbo the Arkenstone?"
My entire body trembles in fear. Any moment my knees may buckle and I'll fall to the floor. His gaze alone terrifies me to the bone.
"Did you hope that it would in some way redeem him? Save him possibly? I am hoping that is what you were doing. That you lied to save him. Now, tell me, why did you say you gave Bilbo the Arkenstone?"
I don't know what to say. I stand there looking at him for the longest time it seems. I can't move, blink, think, or feel.
"ANSWER ME!" he shouts with a slight shake in his voice.
"Because I did!"
I answer quickly after I jump from his voice. That deep below he shouted out in anger. After I respond it he falls silent.
The look in Thorin's eyes, the betrayal, sorrow, and disappointment.
His eyes glass up and he slightly shakes his head "What.....?"
I look down "I...I found the Arkenstone. Minutes before you ran into Bilbo and I after we had escaped Smaug. I had it then, and when you asked for it I was going to give it to you. I swear to you I was....but the look I saw in your eyes....and when you looked at Bilbo the way you did I-" stopping I shake my head and looked back up at Thorin "I knew I couldn't give it to you."
Thorin shakes his head taking a step back "You betrayed me.....you..." he says in a shaky voice. He turns his back and begins walking away.
"No! Thorin I care about you! I wanted to help you. I didn't want to keep it from you. I wanted it to be yours and that's why I gave it to Bilbo. I knew if I held onto it I would cave and give it to you and you would be lost to us. Forever!"
I've walked up the steps now just behind Thorin. I shake my head "I wanted to give it to you. But I knew when I saw your face that I would not be giving it to you. The real you. The Dwarf I met back in the Shire."
Thorin then turns back to me with tears in his eyes "Do not speak to me as if I was some lowly dwarf lord...As-As if I were still...Thorin...Oakenshield." he finishes looking down and his voice cracking as if he is about to cry. With his head bowed I don't know what to say after that. I want to reach for him but recoil my hand speaking shakily "What do you want me to do...?" I whisper. Slowly he looks at me and stares and blinks his tears away "I want you to leave, and never come back."
I look into the eyes I once knew. Those deep ocean hues now turned to a misty sea of grey. Confusion and chaos. I've not only failed the company but I've failed Thorin. With a heavy heart I turn to leave but stop only for a moment. Turning back he looks at me and I stand before him with his piercing cold blue eyes staring back. Neither of us utter a word for the longest time. I then break the silence stepping closer towards him with my eyes never leaving his "Do you know why I came back?" I ask softly "Why I stayed with the company even after we had escaped the goblin hoard, after the Pale Orc nearly killed us, and even after you became...this cruel, cold-hearted, King?"
Thorin turns away from me filled with arrogance and his pride not wanting to meet my eyes. I turn his cheek back to face me. My face is so close to his and I caress his face gently. My eyes scan his features memorizing every single detail. I don't hate Thorin nor do I resent him, but I can't save him unless he wants to be. I stare into his eyes and just above a whisper I say "Because I believed in you. And I still do."
A tear falls down Thorin's cheek as he stares almost longingly to me. I nod and go in to hug my friend but he quickly pulls away. Angling himself to the side he looks to the floor as if he's cowering from me. My hands fall to my sides defeated and I take a step back "Thorin, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry I failed you."