DID Y'ALL SEE EMISONN LAST NIGHT.? 😭😭😭💞 btw I'm sorry guys I don't write smut :(
Alison's pov
"I can't stay away." I said truthfully as Emily stared intensely at me, "At least not anymore, not after today." I said as she sat up a bit more. "What changed your mind?" She asked as I moved closer to her bed, "You did." I admitted truthfully as she opened her mouth to say something but then closed it. "Seeing you today was the hardest thing I've ever done." I said looking into her eyes as she stood up, "Why Ali? Why was it "the hardest thing you've ever done"?" She asked as she walked over to me. "Because I wanted to kiss you, and tell you how much I I've missed you. Being away from you made me realize how much I need you, and I think if I stay away for one more second I'll die. And not just because some psychopath is after me and I'm not safe, but because the more I stay away the more I feel like a huge part of me is missing. I've never been good at these kinds of things." I said pausing as I stared at her and she looked down a bit. "But for you I'll try, because I know that's all I can do, is try. Almost every night for the past couple of years I've slept all alone in some abandoned building. I've watched you and the girls, I've watched you and Maya, you and Paige. It broke my heart every time. Although I couldn't help but know it was my fault." I said bitterly as she looked up at me, "Ali none of this is your fault-" She tried to say but I cut her off. "Please just let me say what I need to say because if I don't I don't think I ever will." I said as she snapped her mouth shut. "I knew it was my fault that I was feeling that way, I knew that if I just told you the truth sooner that maybe just maybe I would've had a chance." I said as she looked up at me in disbelief. "A chance?? A chance Alison? You've always had a fucking chance, no matter who I was with and who I am with. That's not the problem because there's always a chance, the problem is you left. You left without saying goodbye and before they found your body I had always thought you ran off with some boy, and it was easier to convince myself that you never felt anything at all for me. Then they found your body, and I felt like my entire world went crashing down. It had sunken in that you didn't just run off with some boy, you were dead Alison!" She practically yelled as I stared at her as I felt a tear fall. "You were dead and I realized I was never gonna know if you actually had feelings for me." She said in a lower voice, "But I'm not dead! God Emily I'm not!" I yelled a bit as she stared at me and I stared at her with my eyes full of pain. "Aren't you glad that I'm not?" I asked lowly as I looked down. "Are you serious?" She asked in disbelief as I looked up at her, "Do you know how much I've prayed and wished that you'd just come home? Even if I thought it was impossible, I just wanted you back. Do you have any idea how many nights I've spent crying because I miss you so much?! But you don't understand what that felt like do you?" She asked bitterly as I stared at her in disbelief. "Oh I don't understand how that feels?! Emily I cry every night because I miss you so fucking much, sometimes it gets so bad that I wake up saying your name. I understand that I hurt you and that I made a shit load of mistakes, but don't you dare tell that I know how that feels okay? Because I love you so much, I love you so much it scares me. You mean more to me than anyone else every has in my entire life." I said pausing as she stared at me. "I know it's not gonna be easy, it actually gonna be really fucking hard. But I'm Alison dilaurentis, I don't do easy anyway. And no matter how hard this gets I will fight for you, because I can't sit back anymore, I can't hide anymore, and I can't run anymore." I said breathlessly as she continued staring at me. "Why?" She asked as I stared at her, "Why what?" I asked. "Why don't you wanna hide anymore Ali? Why don't you wanna run?" She asked as I stared at her, "Because I'm in love with you Emily! God I am so in love with you, and I'm so selfish because I want you all to myself even though I know I don't deserve you. Even though I know so well that I might break you in the end, because I'm Alison dilaurentis the girl who burns everything she touches, the girl who's not cut out to love or be loved, especially by you." I said truthfully as I started tearing up and I let a couple more tears fall. "But no matter how many times I say all of that, and no matter how much I know that I don't deserve you, it doesn't change the fact that I love you Emily. It doesn't change the fact that I am in love with you." I said staring at her and letting more tears fall. She slowly walked over to me and wiped my tears away, "You know everything you said may be true Ali." She said as she stared into my eyes. "But I already knew all of that Ali, I know how you are, I know you. And believe me I have tried to stop myself, but I can't. Believe it or not I think- no wait I know that I need you just as much as you need me. But none of that even matters sometimes, because I'm in love with you too. And maybe that's all we need, maybe it's all we needed before. And I also know that you are the love of my life, and I Can't go one more day without you here because I love you much." She said smiling lightly at me as I smiled at her. "You love me?" She asked as I nodded, "More than you'll ever know." She admitted as I grabbed her face and smashed our lips together, I felt everything in this kiss. And in this moment I know that the best thing I've ever done was not stay away.