After school on Thursday, I was in Lin's car, and he was driving me straight to the theater.
"I cannot believe this happened." I said out of the blue.
"It's surreal." He agreed.
"It's just, I don't know. It's weird, I'm young, I haven't experienced things like this."
"I was about your age when I first remembered a composers death like this." He started, and I turned to look at him. "Jonathan Larson." He said, and I nodded.
"It's just, Prince. He's a legend, was a legend." I corrected myself, I was shocked, you just never entertained the thought that one day these people would die, it never crosses your mind. To you they're immortal, but they really aren't. "Besides the point," I switched the subject, "why are we getting there early?" I asked.
"Rehearsal." He replied, taking a sharp left.
"Oh, does this include me?" I asked.
"Yep." He smiled to himself, "you want to go into theatre? Professionally?" He asked.
"Of course I do. I mean, it's a pipe dream, but, it's the dream." I replied.
"Well, it doesn't just happen, it's not like in the movies where the main character is singing for her school talent show and gets discovered and gets a massive record deal. It's received through hard work, tons of it, and a degree. I want you to be able to make it, so, I want to push you towards the ability to get that degree." He explained, pulling into the parking lot near the Rodgers.
"I'm not complaining, I'm really grateful actually. I guess, rehearsals are just really fun with this cast." I shrugged. I knew what he was saying with the degree. You don't make it anywhere on Broadway without having gone to some fancy music college. Believe me, I know like 6 Carnegie graduates and 4 Juilliard graduates.
"Awesome Niñita," he hugged me into his side as he turned the corner to see people surrounding the stage door. "How? How do they find out when rehearsal starts?" I heard him muttering.
"I really don't want to do this." I whispered to him, referring to the mob surrounding the door.
"Why?" He asked, considering the slight fear in my voice.
"I'm afraid of them. They all know what happened. They aren't supposed to know. It sucks to be looked at like that. Like you're weak." I somewhat spat the last word, "I can't be weak." I admitted.
"And why can't you be weak?" He asked.
"Because, well, I've always had to fight for myself." I shrugged.
"Well, not anymore. I know you're used to being an adult, but it's your turn to be the kid. And when you're a kid, it's ok to be weak." He pulled me into a hug. "Ok, now, I'll protect you, it's what I'm supposed to do as your dad." With he pulled me close to his side with his arm wrapped around my waist. "We got this Niñita." He said, as we approached the hoard of screaming fans.
"Abi!" A girl standing near the door yelled, she was smiling, so, I wasn't afraid. Lin was walking really quickly, whilst managing to wave at literally everyone, "I got you something!" The girl said, when I was passing her, I detached myself from Lin.
"Me?" I asked, stopping walking.
"Yeah!" She was grinning, "it's inside! There's a really long letter too. You don't have to read it." She said.
"Oh! I'll read it!" I smiled at her, "thank you!"
"Niñita." I heard Lin, and I turned to look at him, he was inside, and was holding the door open, "come on."
"Thank you!" I said to her again, and ran inside.
"What was that all about?" He asked, closing the door behind me.
"She got me something." I smiled.
"Where is it?" He asked.
"She said inside, so, somewhere in here." I gestured to the theater.
"They generally put them in your dressing room." He said, walking to his.
"That is very unhelpful due to me not having a dressing room, because I'm not in the cast."
"Ok, well, try your stand, if it's not there, they probably put it in my room, and if they did, it'll take me about 2 months to find it." He patted my back.
"Alright, so wish me luck." I said, turning towards the lobby.
"Good luck." He said, heading towards his dressing room. "Remember rehearsal." He called back to me.
"I will!" I got over to my little stand, and I found a package wrapped in pink paper, with an envelope tucked into it. I smiled, grabbed the package and ran backstage, setting down on the table before going into rehearsal.
•••
Rehearsal went well, I enjoyed it, once it was over, I was going backstage when I heard Anthony.
"Kid! You got a thing!" He yelled.
"I know!" I came in.
"Open it. We wants to see!" He handed it to me, and I sat down.
"Alright, Kid got a gift" I heard Gregory, and looked up to see him videoing me. "Open the thing."
"Okay." I laughed a little, and tore off the wrapping paper. Inside was a scrapbook, with my name on it in sparkly pink letters.
"Open it open it open it!" Thayne sat next to me.
"Alright." I laughed, and opened the little scrapbook. The first page had a letter, and as I flipped through the whole scrapbook had letters and pictures. "This is the greatest thing I have ever received." I looked at Gregory's phone. "Thank you!" I flipped back to the first page, "I'm just going to read this, and like, cry."
"Wait, why are you going to cry?" Lin asked, coming backstage.
"Someone made me a scrapbook." I said handing it to him.
"That's so sweet." He said, flipping it open.
" I know, it's really nice. I love it."
"Wow. There's a lot of letters in this." He said, handing it back to me, "this is going to take you a while to read."
"I know." I said, sitting at the table opening it to the first page.
Abigail,
Hi! My names Maddie Krause, I live in Texas and I guess, I'm just trying to say that, we want you to know that we all love you. I mean, when we (the HamFam) found out about what happened last week, we were shocked, and really upset. I know that the world hasn't always been kind to you, (very rarely has the world been kind to you) but we're going to be kind to you.
I guess we just want to remind you that you are loved and you have people all over the world who are rooting for you.
- Maddie
Abi,
Hey, my name's Lea, and I wanted to tell you that you're gorgeous, and strong and smart, truly you're amazing. I'm so sorry that life's crap, it really is, you don't deserve what the world has thrown at you, no one does, but you in particular.
If you ever need a contracted killer, I'm your guy. (Not I know a guy, I mean, I will literally kill for you)
Love, Lea.
Abigail,
You are one of my favorite people. You're funny, talented, sweet, strong, and you're really gorgeous. Anyways, I thought you should know that.
I would love to see you at the stage door, I know you sometimes come out with Lin. So, if you ever come out and there's a 5'1' girl shrieking your name, it's most likely me.
Anyways, love from the HamFam
- Becca Robertson.
All of these were on the first page, I thumbed through the rest of the book. There were at least 20 more pages. I decided to attack the rest of those later, and just read the attached letter. I opened it, inside was three pieces of notebook paper folded over one another, and a fourth piece separate. I started with the long three page letter.
Dear Abigail,
Hi! My names Anna, and I'm the person who more or less assembled this scrapbook. I was going to try and say hi to you as you came in today, so, I might have said hi to you, maybe not.
Anywho, I read the article about you, and it kind of pissed me off, for a couple reasons. Firstly, they didn't really have a right to tell anyone what happened, and secondly, I was upset that this happened in the first place.
You are an inspiration for so many people. I'm very serious. I came from an abusive home, and I've always kind of felt, connected to you, (I'm so sorry that sounded really creepy). Honestly, you handled this situation way better than I did. I got angry, I hit back, I never kept my composure and in return I hurt other people.
It's really because of you that I stopped. I saw a girl, in my situation who dealt with abuse with grace, and was soft and kind and loving. I always thought that you couldn't love others after this had happened to you.
You were the reason I told someone. I called the cops on my parents and it worked. I'm living, very happily, with my grandparents, and it's all thanks to you.
Frankly it's thanks to you that I'm alive.
Since you saved my life, I want to try and help save yours. I got a bunch of people on Instagram and Twitter to send in notes and letters, and I would compile them into this scrapbook for you. I hope you like it.
That was only the first half page of the letter, I can't believe I've impacted people's lives like that.
•••
Sorry this is late.
LIN AND JLO REPLIED TO ME DURING THE TAKEOVER THINGY!
Thanks for reading!
- Abi