Hi guys! Because of your overwhelming support to this story, I decided to write two special chapters as my great appreciation to all of you who. The other chapter is in private mode. And also I'm making this story together with my other two on-going stories Sleeping Beauty and Destroying a Fairytale as my entries to #Wattys2016. Thank you again for your overwhelming support! I feel so blessed to have you guys as my readers! God Bless! Mwah!
Special Chapter #1
My heart started to beat rapidly the moment I saw the love of my life at the center of the aisle. All our attention were focused on her as she started to walk slowly. I smiled widely as I let the overwhelming joy fill my whole being. Finally... she's mine forever.
Unti-unting namuo ang luha sa aking mata dahil sa labis na kasiyahan na nadarama ko. Malawak rin ang ngiti niya habang nakatingin sa akin. My wife is so beautiful but what makes her extraordinary beautiful is her heart. Her heart that's full of love, kindness and gentleness.
And I am so proud to shout to the word that her heart belongs to me. She belongs to me.
Forever.
"What if I never knew
What if I never found you
I'd never have this feeling in my heart..."
And I belong to her also... the moment I laid my eyes on her. I exactly remember how I met her when we were both young. Noong panahon na naka-pigtails pa ang kulot-kulot niyang buhok, may pink pa siyang shoulder bag at wala pang kamuwang-muwang sa masakit na mundong ito. Noong panahon na 'Kuya' pa ang turing niya sa akin.
"Sai, dito ka lang ha? May bibilhin lang ako pero babalik ako kaagad. Huwag kang aalis."
"Yes, Yaya. Dito lang po ako."
Napatingin ako doon sa lugar kung saan ko narinig ang boses na iyon. Bahagya akong lumapit para tignan kung sino sila... isang batang babae at yung Yaya niya. Nakatalikod sa akin 'yung bata habang kinakausap siya ng kasama nito. Ilang sandali pa ay umalis na 'yung Yaya niya at naiwan siyang mag-isa doon sa bench.
Paano kapag nawala siya?
Umalis kasi ako sa bahay namin dahil wala naman akong magagawa doon. Walang pumapansin o kumakausap sa akin sa bahay bukod kay Mama dahil sa kondisyon ko. No one ever tries to go closer to me. Kahit na noong elementary ako. I graduated as our class valedictorian pero wala man lang akong naging kaibigan.
May kulang tuloy sa buhay ko. Yung taong makakaintindi sa akin. Yung taong ituturing ako na normal na bata.
"Hello po!" she greeted me in her soft voice.
Ngayon ko lang napagtanto na nakatingin na siya sa akin. Bigla akong nakaramdam ng hiya dahil nahuli niya akong nakatingin sa kanya. I avoided her gaze and walked closer to her.
"Hoy, bata..." that's my entrance to her.
Tumingin ako sa kanya. I was shocked when I saw her smiling at me. Her chubby cheekbones makes her looks so cute. Natigilan ako sa ngiti niyang iyon... I suddenly want to cry. Pakiramdam ko ay tinupad niya ang isa sa mga munting pangarap ko.
Her smile looks so happy. Her smile is for me. The innocent smile she flashed is for me.
"Bakit po, Kuya?" tanong niya ng makarating ako sa harapan niya. Napalabi siya.
Ang cute niya. I looked into her eyes and I swear I felt something warm on my heart. All my life, I feel so cold... I feel so lonely until she came.
"Bakit mag-isa ka lang? Paano kapag nawala ka? Kapag may kumuha sa'yo?"
Muli na naman siyang napalabi at napatingin doon sa maliit na pink niyang shoulder bag at pinaglaruan ito. Hindi ko alam kung naiintindihan niya ang sinabi ko. Ilang taon na kaya siya?
"Babalik naman po kaagad si Yaya..." mahinang sagot niya.
Umupo ako sa tabi niya at nakaramdam muli ako ng saya ng hindi siya lumayo sa akin. She smiled at me again then she opened her bag. Yumuko siya at may hinanap doon sa loob ng bag niya. Pinagmasdan ko lang siya at napangiti. Bakit kaya hindi siya lumayo o natakot man lang sa akin? She even smiled at me.
"Hindi niyo naman po ako kukunin di ba, Kuya?" aniya at may nilabas siyang dalawang chocolate bars mula doon sa bag niya. Inabot niya sa akin ang isa. Napatingin ako doon at hindi nasagot ang tanong niya.
"Heto po, Kuya. Sabi kasi sa akin ni Mama, share your blessings daw po." aniya.
Nung hindi ko kinuha yung binibigay niya ay nabigla ako ng hawakan niya ang isang kamay ko at inilapit sa kanya. Hindi naman ako nakahuma sa ginawa niya. Pakiramdam ko ay nakuryente ako sa biglang paghawak niya sa kamay ko. Ipinatong niya yung isang chocolate bar sa ibabaw ng palad ko.
"Kainin niyo po 'yan, Kuya. Masarap po 'yan..." aniya at muling ngumiti sa akin.
I sighed. Ibinaling ko ang atensyon ko doon sa pagkaing binigay niya at napangiti. I looked at her, sinimulan na niyang kainin ang chocolate bar niya. Binuksan ko naman iyong sa akin at sinimulan na ring kainin.
"Ano nga palang name mo?" tanong ko sa kanya. Tumingin siya sa akin.
"My name is Sai po..." sagot niya.
"Sai? Yan lang?" I asked.
Umiling naman siya sa akin at itunuon ang atensyon doon sa kinakain niya.
"Hindi po... di ko po kasi masabi yung buong pangalan ko po. Mahirap po, e."
Napangiti na lang ako at tumango. Okay, her name is Sai. I'll just remember her in that name. Maybe next time she can tell me her whole name. Pinagmasdan ko lang siya habang inuubos niya ang pagkain niya.
"Ikaw po, Kuya? Anong pangalan mo?" tanong niya sa akin. Tumingin ulit siya sa akin.
"Jared..." I smiled at her.
Ngumiti ulit siya sa akin habang pinagmamasdan ako. Parang gusto kong lagi niya na lang akong tignan. Parang gusto kong ako na lang ang lagi niyang makita, ako na lang ang makikita niya.
"Ja-red..." inulit niya ang pangalan ko. Lumakas ang tibok ng puso ko.
Parang gusto ko na lang din na banggitin niya ang pangalan ko lagi. Siguro nga tama silang lahat. Baka baliw na nga talaga ako. Pero sabik lang kasi talaga ako sa kaibigan. Isang bagay na pinagkait sa akin ng mga tao sa paligid ko.
"Ilang taon ka na?" tanong ko sa kanya.
Muli na naman siyang ngumiti at pinakita sa akin ang isang kamay niya. Napatingin ako doon, five years old palang siya?
"Five po, Kuya pero magsi-six na rin po ako next month." aniya at humagikgik.
Tumango ako. So mas matanda ako sa kanya ng limang taon.
"Sabi ni Yaya bawal daw akong mag-talk sa mga strangers. Pero hindi ka naman na po stranger kasi sinabi mo na 'yung pangalan mo." aniya at may kinuha siya sa gilid niya na malaking coloring book. Kinuha niya rin ang isang box ng pangkulay at inabot sa akin.
"Pahawak po muna..." aniya pagkatapos ay umayos siya ng upo at nilagay sa ibabaw ng hita niya iyon tsaka binuksan ang kanyang coloring book. Ilang sandali ay kinuha niya sa akin ang pangkulay niya.
"Hindi ka ba natatakot sa akin?" I asked her.
Napatigil siya sa pagkulay at napatingin sa akin. Nakakunot ang kanyang noo at napalabi habang pinagmamasdan ako. "Bakit naman po ako matatakot sa'yo, Kuya? Hindi ka naman monster, e. Tsaka mabait ka naman po. Hindi mo ako kinuha." aniya at nagpatuloy sa pagkulay.
"Kapag ba kinuha kita, sasama ka ba sa akin?" wala sa sariling tanong ko.
Napatingin siya sa akin at namayani ang katahimikan sa paligid namin.
Nang makarating sa harapan ko si Gail ay naglahad ako ng kamay sa kanya. She looked at me with her teary eyes, beside her is her father... looking at us with his teary eyes too. Napatingin si Gail sa aking kamay at ipinatong doon ang kamay niya. I smiled.
"Dati, kaya ako pumayag na makasal kayo ay para sa ikabubuti ng anak ko. Kasi gusto kong mababantayan ko siya at may magbabantay sa kanya. Ayoko siyang pakawalan dahil baka mawala siya sa amin ng nanay niya." napatingin kami sa ama ni Gail.
"Pa..."
"Pero ngayon, I'm giving our princess a hundred percent freedom to go and spend the rest of her life with you, Jared. Hindi kami makikialam ng kanyang ina not unless she wants us to be involved." bumaling siya kay Gail at niyakap ito ng mahigpit.
"I want you to be happy... to find your happiness on your own. At heto na 'yun, anak."
"Thank you, Pa..." mahinang sabi ni Gail.
Napatingin sa akin ang ama ni Gail. I smiled at him. I am thankful for him for trusting me his daughter. Kaya hindi ko sila bibiguin.
"Take care of my daughter, Jared." matigas na saad niya. I nodded.
"I will, Pa."
Humiwalay na si Gail sa kanyang ama at lumapit sa akin. Hinigpitan niya ang hawak sa aking kamay... I looked at her. Ganun din ang ginawa ko, mas hinigpitan ko ang hawak sa kanyang kamay. We both smiled at each other. Sabay kaming naglakad papunta sa gitna kung saan nag-aantay ang magkakasal sa amin. The pastor smiled at us.
And indeed today, my little Sai... my Gail... my wife decided to go with me in this lifelong journey. And I'll make sure that she will never regret her decision.
"How did this come to be
I don't know how you found me
But from the moment I saw you
Deep inside my heart I knew"
I've waited enough for this day. For our forever. I know I'm not that kind of person who loves to wait for so long... but Gail taught me to wait. To wait for the right time for us to be together eternally. She taught me the real essence of waiting.
Gail taught me to love selflessly.
She's the answer to all my prayers. That's why I am forever thankful to God for giving me the woman that I need in my life. She's one of the greatest success that I have. She's my greatest blessing.
"Baby you're my destiny
You and I were meant to be
With all my heart and soul
I give my love to have and hold
And as far as I can see
You were always meant to be
My destiny..."
I kissed the side of her head while we're listening to the words of our Pastor. Hinawakan naman niya ang kamay ko ng mahigpit. I smiled. I'm such blessed man for having her as my wife. Pakiramdam ko ay tuluyan ng nagliwanag ang madilim kong buhay. Lahat ng sakit, lungkot at pangungulilang naramdaman ko ay naglaho na ng tuluyan.
I change. I was redeemed. I was saved. And now this my victory.
Our victory.
Wala na akong ibang maramdaman sa araw na ito kundi ang saya. I know we're already married for seven years but this time it's different. Masaya ako na masasaksihan ng lahat ng taong mahalaga sa amin ang araw na ito. I am so proud to tell the whole world that I am marrying again my first and last love, Gail.
This day is not a product my selfishness but rather... this is how everything supposedly will happen if just learn how to wait before.
"I love you, baby..." I whispered to her ears.
I will never get tired to tell her those words. I'm going to tell it to her every morning when we woke up... every evening before we sleep. I will tell it to her every time we're together.
"I love you too, Jared." aniya at sinulyapan ako. She smiled at me. "I loved you yesterday. I love you today and I will love you for the rest of our lives. I am so proud of you, Jared. Kasi nagawa mong lagpasan ang mga pagsubok sa buhay mo-" she said and I interrupted her.
"It's because of you, baby." I smiled at her. Marahan naman siyang umiling.
"Loving you with all my heart is one of the best decisions that I made in my life. And I know staying with you forever is a decision that I will never regret. I want to see my future with you, Jared. I want to be part of your every success. I want to stay at your side when you need me or even if you don't really need me. I will serve you and our future family wholeheartedly. I will become a best wife like how you'll become a best husband to me..." her voice broke and she bit her lower lip. Her eyes are teary.
You don't need to tell that to me, baby. Because I know that you'll do that even without telling it. You let your selfless heart do all the magic in our relationship. You are so considerate to even the smallest detail of my life. At sa huli... heto pa rin ako't mahal na mahal ka pa rin. Ikaw pa rin. Ikaw lang.
Ngumiti ako sa kanya at marahang tumango. Her words are so much to comfort my heart. It gives me an overwhelming joy that is too much to handle. Parang gusto kong umiyak sa sobrang saya. I want to hug her tightly.
"Jared, thank you. Thank you for your love. It's because of your love that I was able to step out from my comfort zone. I was able to do things that I thought I can't do. You also taught me how to love selflessly, Jared." aniya at tuluyang tumulo ang kanyang luha na kaagad din niyang pinalis.
I touch her face and look at her.
No Gail, kahit baliktarin natin ang mundo ikaw ang nagturo sa akin kung paano ang magmahal ng hindi iniisip ang sarili. Ang magmahal ng handang tumanggap ng kahit anong emosyon... kahit ng sakit.
"I learned when you love someone, you should love him wholly. You should love their perfections... and their imperfections more. I accepted you wholly, Jared. I love you when you make me happy... when you make me feel secure... when you're with me. And I love you more when you hurt me because I know that my love for you is not shallow. Kasi handa akong harapin ang sakit... para sa'yo kasi mas higit pa ang pagmamahal ko kesa sa sakit na iyon." she smiled at me.
I pulled her closer to me for a hug. She hugged me back.
Hinding-hindi na kita sasaktan pa, Gail. Hindi na.
Nung humiwalay siya sa akin ay muli niya akong tinignan ng diretso sa mata. She smiled at me as she gently touched my face. I closed my eyes and let her touch me.
"I will never leave you again, Jared. I promise that I will make you happy. I will be with you until we get older... we will enjoy this lifetime together. I will do my best to not hurt you again. I will do anything for you... because I love you too much, Jared. Thank you for waiting and for loving me... Mahal na mahal kita, Jared." she smiled at me.
"Je t'aime, baby." I winked at her. "You're mine."
She smiled at me and nodded. "I'm yours, Jared."
Basta sayo lang manggaling na akin ka, sapat na iyon.
"I wanted someone like you
Someone that I could hold on to
And give my love until the end of time
But forever was just a word
Something I'd only heard about
But now you're always there for me
When you say forever I believe..."
"Gail..." my voice broke. I smiled as tears are starting to build up in my eyes.
She's just smiling while looking at me directly in my eyes. I held her hand. Namayani ang katahimikan sa buong lugar habang inaantay nila ang mga sasabihin ko. I can feel that my lips are quivering because I am trying to hold back my tears.
"Gail, I'm sorry." I started as I tighten my grip on her hand. Mas nauna pang tumulong muli ang kanyang luha kesa sa akin. I wiped it using my free hand.
"I'm sorry because you are destined to me like how I am destined to you. I am meant to you and you are meant to me. You can be in this place having another groom to share your vows with. Pwede kang maging masaya sa piling ng iba. Pwedeng hindi ako ang lalaking mamahalin mo. Pwedeng iba. And thinking about that breaks my heart into pieces..." I stopped and wiped her tears again.
"But God declared that it is me whom you'll share your forever with. So you need to deal with it okay?" I grinned.
Tumawa naman ang mga tao sa paligid namin ganun din ang babaeng mahal ko. She slowly nodded and smiled at me again.
"We faced a lot of struggles but here we are, strong and going stronger. I know I caused you so much pain because of my selfishness. Because I am eager to get and to keep you. Kaya kahit masaktan at mahirapan ka, ayos lang basta alam kong ako ang kasama mo. But I realize that I shouldn't be like that. Love is something more than that... and that's what you taught me. You taught me how to love selflessly."
Bahagya akong ngumiti sa kanya.
"If someone will ask me about the way how you love me, I'll proudly answer them with a simple '1 Corinthians 13:4-6' because that's how I describe the kind of selfless unconditional love that you have. You are so amazing for having a heart that loves that way, Gail. And I am thankful to Him for that."
Naalala ko ang lahat ng mga nangyari sa amin noon. The first time I met her as Gail, the weird things that I do just to get her, and the struggles and pains that she faced because of me. I know that I tried to defy destiny because of what I did. Kasi natakot ako na baka mapunta si Gail sa iba. I am so selfish back then. I want to regret it but somehow I don't want to regret it because those experiences helped me to become who am I today.
I become a better man.
"And you taught me also that love is 1 Corinthians 13:7, baby." I grinned.
Muli na namang tumawa ang mga tao sa paligid namin. Ang buong atensyon ko naman ay nasa babaeng nasa harapan ko ngayon. She's laughing while looking at me with her teary eyes. Inangat ko ang kanyang kamay ay sandaling hinalikan ang ibabaw ng palad niya.
"Jared..." mahinang tawag niya sa akin.
"You helped me to overcome the darkness that imprisoned me for so long. Your love tamed the beast in me. You love me with all your heart. You love me despite of my flaws. You love my imperfections perfectly, Gail. Tinanggap mo ako ng buong-buo... ng walang pag-aalinlangan. And I am so thankful to you, baby. I am so blessed to have you in my life." I wholeheartedly said to her. She closed her eyes and nodded.
"Baby you're my destiny
You and I were meant to be
With all my heart and soul
I give my love to have and hold
And as far as I can see
You were always meant to be
My destiny..."
"I worked hard to get you and now I will work harder to keep you, Gail. I promise to love you until the end of time. I will be your greatest supporter. I will be your number one fan in your career. I will be your forever Kuya, best friend, lover and your husband. I'm going to be a best father to our children. I will take care of you and our family. I will always listen to you and set aside my own desires just to catch up with yours. I will love you selflessly... even though sometimes I won't deny that I am still selfish and possessive in some ways." tumaas ang gilid ng aking labi habang pinagmamasdan siya.
I know that I changed a lot. Pero may mga bagay na hindi nagbago at hinding-hindi na magbabago, at iyon ang pagmamahal ko para sa'yo, Gail. Ang puso kong pag-aari mo na mula pa noong mga bata palang tayo. Noon palang ay tinadhana na tayo para sa isa't isa.
I am so thankful to God that He gave me my first love, Sai to be my last love. Naging makasarili man ako sa pagkuha ko noon kay Gail, alam kong mali iyon... pero salamat dahil ang kinuha ko pala ay ang babaeng akin naman na noong una palang.
I know the first time I met Sai, I already marked her mine. Probably my heart recognized her when we met again at our university. Maybe God created a move for us to meet once again... and this time it will be forever.
Napaghiwalay man kami ng panahon, sa huli ay kami pa ring dalawa.
"I love you, baby. Nothing can tear us apart... not even death." I smiled at her.
"Mahal na mahal din kita, Jared." she started to cry again.
"Maybe all we need
Is just a little faith
'Cause baby I believe
That love will find the way
Hey yeah..."
When you're destined to each other, love will find a way. God will do something to move you both closer to each other. I married the woman that I'm dreaming to have all my life. Hindi na siya pangarap na lang dahil nandito na siya sa tabi ko ngayon.
We proclaim our love for each other today, in front of God and the people around us. And this is just a start of our journey to forever. This is the right time for us. The curse of darkness and brokenness in my life broke... the moment Saerin Gail came into my life.
"Baby you're my destiny
You and I were meant to be
With all my heart and soul
I give my love to have and hold
And as far as I can see
You were always meant to be
My destiny
You're my destiny..."
"You may now kiss the bride..." the Pastor said.
I smiled at him before I turned my full attention to my wife. She smiled at me. I cupped her face and leaned closer to her. I smiled at her. "Mahal na mahal kita, Gail. Sobra."
Bahagya siyang humalakhak at marahang tumango. "Mahal na mahal din kita, Jared-"
I didn't let her finish. I kissed her gently and savour that moment. She wrapped her arms around my neck as I deepen the kiss. Nang humiwalay ako sa kanya at ngumiti bago ko siya hinatak palapit sa akin at niyakap ng mahigpit. She hugged me back. Kasabay nito ay ang palakpakan ng mga taong naging saksi sa araw na ito.
The little girl who used to call me Kuya years ago? The girl who made my nose bleed because of throwing a ball in my face? The lady who surrendered herself when she was eighteen? The woman who made me wait for six years to fulfill her dreams?
The beauty of this beast?
She's now ready to settle down and to live with me forever.