A knock sounds at the door.
"Gen?"
It's Bridget. I quickly wipe the tears from my face and take a deep breath. This only takes a couple of seconds, of course, but Bridget is already speaking again sounding irritated, stressed, and confused all at the same time.
"Gen, let me in. This is my room too."
Popping up from my bed I head to the door and open it just a crack. When I've made certain that it truly is only Bridget, I open the door just enough for her to get inside before closing it.
Bridget storms across the room and starts pacing. It almost makes me smile, except for the fact that her cheeks are tear stained. The Tolia kids have convinced me that pacing when you're anxious is some kind of genetic trait. They all do it.
"Who is this Aunt Cassie? Why does she-? Ugh! Who does she think she is?" she rages.
"Bridget, calm down," I say, taking in a shaky breath so I can keep my own composure.
Stopping dead in her tracks, she brings a hand through her hair and blows air through her lips before turning to face me. "Sorry," she mumbles. "I guess she is your aunt..."
I scoff and cross my arms. This makes Bridget give me that look that tells me she knows I'm hiding some aspect of my past about Aunt Cassie. Which, of course is true. They know nothing about her...
"She doesn't deserve that title... Did you not notice I literally ran away from her?" I mumble to the floor, with more sadness than anger.
"Genevieve Rose Tolia."
Bridget walks up and forces me to look her in the eyes. "What. Happened?"
I shake my head and blink back tears. "Please don't make me do this, Bridge," I beg. "Just... Tell me she's left."
Bridget's hard, determined expression softens a bit and a twinge of guilt flashes across her face. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... I'm sorry."
"It's ok. You deserve to know but at the same time," I pause and laugh an awkward, sad laugh. "At the same time you deserve not to know."
I sit down on the edge of my bed, the bright tie dye colors doing nothing to brighten my mood. My hands drag down my cheeks as I try to keep the tears in. Bridget hesitantly sits down next to me.
"Gen... Gen, she's still here. She's... Ummm... She's talking with Mom and Dad..."
My head snaps up. "Why?"
What more could she possibly take a way from me?
Bridget's own eyes begin to water and she can't even get the words out of her mouth. "She... Well... Gen... She..."
"What?" I whisper-shriek.
She turns her head away and the looks down at her hands. "I'm trying to decide it it's really my place to tell you or not."
"Tell me what?" I push.
She licks her lips and meets my eyes for a second. Several times she opens her mouth to speak but can't force the words out. Finally, she says, "Gen... She... She wants to bring you to her home."
I stand up suddenly. "WHAT?" I demand, the tears no longer staying inside me. I sit back down suddenly and just cry.
I'm a rag doll being thrown from place to place. Mr. And Mrs. T are probably showing Aunt Cassie the government papers while she argues that I'm biological family to her. Why did I think I'd find a stable home?? I'm being fought over like some old precious antique.
"Gen, she can't make you do anything. You have to have a say in... Well ya know."
"Well then go down there and tell her to go away. I want nothing to do with her," I sob.
"Would you talk to her first?"
I jerk my head up when I hear that voice to find Aunt Cassie standing in the doorway, a solemn look on her face. Bridget's arm wraps tighter around my shoulder and I feel her go tense.
"Please," Aunt Cassie whispers. "If not for me, do it for your cousins."
I look up at her with eyes I'm sure show my weakness. "Franklin and Josie are here?"
She smiles a little. "Yeah, downstairs."
I laugh and cry all at the same time. I don't know what to feel anymore. Josie is my age and Franklin would be... Six now. He was just a little guy when I left home but... I loved him so much...
I look at Bridget. Her face is stone. Her lips are pursed and she's staring at Aunt Cassie, daring her to make a move towards me. Praying for God to give me strength, I lay my head on her shoulder. "Let her talk to me, Bridge," I whisper hesitantly. I look at Aunt Cassie who's eyeing Bridget nervously.
"If she hurts you in any way..." Bridget mutters in my ear.
"Don't worry," Aunt Cassie says, straining to put some sort of lightness in her voice. "Your sister has already threatened me enough."
Bridget doesn't laugh. She slowly takes her arm off from around my shoulders, glaring at Aunt Cassie all the while. Aunt Cassie's eyes fall to the floor as Bridget stalks out of the room. I suddenly wish she hadn't left.
Aunt Cassie takes a step towards me slowly. She's studying me, her big green eyes tired and sad... They resemble her brother's so much. Her brother. My father.
I back away until I hit the headboard. She looks like she wants to tackle me in a hug again but instead licks her lips and sits on the end of the bed. She looks around at the walls and pats the little bun on her head. The silence between us stretches until the tension is almost tangible.
"Three bullets..." Aunt Cassie whispers. "One in Iraq and two in your own school... I don't know why it would happen that way to a girl like you."
I shake my head, the tears unstoppable now. I don't want to talk about it. Why can't I open my mouth to beg her to stop? This is about why she's here not why I'm broken.
She turns her head my way. "I'm sorry, Baby. I didn't mean to..."
"What do you want?" I whisper.
She swings her legs to the opposite side of the bed and bites her lip.
"A second chance."
I close my eyes and breath deeply. "What... What do you mean?"
Her eyes spill over. She reaches over and touches my knee gingerly.
"Come home, Gen."
********************
I run outside the house begging no one to follow me. I need to clear my head.
Running through the front yard, I feel the grass between my toes.
Why'd I have to accept being adopted? Now the Tolias have to deal with Aunt Cassie who'd somehow heard the news story and stalked us until she found out where I ended up. I don't know if I can forgive her. I really don't know if I can. Maybe, I'll just tell her I've found my new life, she's not a part of it and that could be the end of it.
But somehow, I can't bring myself to do that either. I start down the sidewalk and run my hands along my head. As I had run out the door, I caught the eyes of Franklin and Josie and my heart melted. I can't pretend I don't remember them; can't forget that they're so close to me after all these years.
"Mommy, Genny has a letter!" Josie calls.
Aunt Cassie shows up at the door, cradling baby Franklin. She gives me a funny look. "Hey umm Genevieve, where's Mommy?"
The tears are rolling down my face and I'm screaming.
"A bad man had a gun, Aunty!" I bawled to her. She looks at me with wide eyes.
"He-He got Mommy and E-E-Elena!"
Josie looks at me with horrified eyes. She wraps me in her arms and let's me bawl in her shoulder. Aunt Cassie's eyes looked pained.
"Let's get a hold of your Dad, baby."
I shake my head the tears streaming down my face still and sobs wrenching my tiny eight year old body. I hold out the letter, Josie still clinging to me.
Aunt Cassie adjusts the way she's holding Franklin so she can grab the letter, already unfolded. It's crinkled from the clutch of my hand. She squints and begins to read. She gasps and her own tears begin to spill as she reads the notice of my father's death.
"Aunt Cassie... Where will I sleep tonight?"
Aunt Cassie shakes her head. "Josie, go inside..." she mutters.
Josie reluctantly let's me go and heads inside.
"Gen... Babe, I'm going to take you to the foster home, ok? The place for... Umm... Kids without mommies and daddies. I can't take you in, I... I just can't." She's fighting her tears, the news of the death of three of her relatives overtaking her almost as much as it was me.
"But, Aunt Cassie, I wouldn't be any trouble!" I beg.
"I just CAN'T! Gen!"
There's silence between us for a moment; nothing but the sound of my short breaths and gasps for air between tears.
"I'm going to go get Josie. We'll all get in the car," she mumbles stalking inside.
That's when I start running.