Ashton's PoV:
This was the part I hated the most.
The look in Carters eyes as I hugged Ender goodbye and then moved to do the same to her about broke my heart.
Her eyes, the beautiful grey they were, always seemed to get a bit darker, though she never cried which I was extremely thankful for because I knew if she cried I would lose all of my resolve and never leave Haven Harbour.
My arms wound around her back as I pulled her into me, getting her as close to me as possible.
"I'll see you in two weeks." She said as she hugged me back.
"I can't wait." I breathed into her ear, my cheek pressed against her hair.
My hands moved to fit around her small waist and I was sure If I tried I could wrap both hands around it and my fingers would overlap, but I had annoyingly long fingers and I knew that wasn't fair.
Not wanting to let her go just quite yet, I leaned down and fitted my lips against hers. As always they tasted like her honey chapstick that I had bought a tube for myself to use whenever I was gone so I never forgot the taste of her lips.
She was becoming quite the expert on kissing as the moved her lips professionally between mine, it was practically sinful.
I wished I could go farther with the kiss but Ender was still in the room and I didn't have much time, I had to catch the ferry in twenty minutes.
"Call me when you get there." She smiled sweetly up at me, her hand on the side of my face.
"I will." I gazed down happily at her, completely mesmerised by her as always.
"Okay." She lowered her eyes from mine to my lips and looked back up at me through her eyelashes, not quite smiling but her lips were parted and I could see the bottom of her top teeth against the light pink of her lips. She was incredibly sexy and had absolutely no idea.
Reaching up on her tiptoes she pressed her lips to mine once more before stepping back.
Still grinning, I grabbed the handle of my bag and unfortunately began to walk to the door.
"I'll see you guys in two weeks!" I called out to them as I exited the front door. Ender yelled goodbye to me and I turned back to give him a wave before I was unfortunately walking away from them and back into reality.
I felt like throwing up as I drove away from the house and to the ferry; leaving them making me nauseous.
Once I was settled into the ferry I sat in my car with the engine off, staring out the window.
A lot had changed for me in the past several months and the Chases' were definitely the main reason for that.
Ender had become like a little brother to me; someone I felt I needed to protect, but I also felt like I almost had this paternal instinct when I was around him to be this role model and care for him like a father would. I loved him like he was my own child or sibling.
Carter was like a whole new world for me. She was so innocent and sweet and caring and just perfect for me in absolutely every way I could possibly imagine. In the relatively short time I had known her she had instantly captured my heart and I knew I was in love with her.
Michael knew I was in love with her, Luke knew I was in love with her, Calum knew I was in love with her, my mum knew I was in love with her; honestly I wouldn't be surprised if she knew it herself. Even her friends knew, but I had made Ari swear to me that she wouldn't say anything after she had jumped up and down squealing like a kid on Christmas morning, more like Ender on Christmas morning. She had guessed it after I had shown up to Enders party yesterday and had pulled me aside while Carter was chatting with a couple of the moms.
"It was nice of you to be here, I know it made both of them really happy." She had said to me.
"I couldn't miss this. I wanted to be here." I had smiled back at her.
It was quiet for a moment before she said something that made my breath catch in my throat.
"You love her don't you?" She asked like she could read my mind.
I paused before answering.
"Yes, I do." My gaze shifted over to where Carter was, now playing with a few of the kids who were surrounding her and beaming up at her like she was a celebrity. "I mean, how can you not love her?" I asked rhetorically.
Ari was grinning ecstatically next to me, bouncing slightly on her feet.
"You can not tell her that, okay? I'm waiting for the right time to tell her." I turned to her, deadly serious.
"My lips are sealed." She motioned like she was zipping up her lips and throwing away the key, a happy little smirk on her face the whole time.
Being in love with Carter was the most beautiful and horrible thing at the same time; because I knew if I told her I loved her, then I would have to tell her all of the secrets I had been hiding from her. That's why I was waiting to tell her, because I had already dug my hole too deep and I didn't know how to go back without breaking her heart. And breaking her heart would surely break mine.
When the ferry landed I took a dark grey beanie and my sunglasses from my bag and put them on, pulling the beanie down to cover most of my forehead.
I drove my car off the boat but instead of driving home I drove to the parking lot outside the port, looking for a black SUV. When I found it I parked next to it and took my bag from the passenger seat and opened the door, leaving the engine running and the door open.
My mother stepped out of the SUV and gave me a hug and a kiss and a few words of greeting before telling me to call her later. She took my spot in my jeep while I climbed into he back of the SUV, the driver giving me a friendly hello.
The SUV took me to the airport where thankfully no one was waiting for me and dropped me off with my bag.
I made my way through private security without being noticed (that I knew of), and made my way to the terminal.
As I sat in the waiting area for my flight I sent Carter a text telling her I was home and would be going out with the boys tonight so I would call her tomorrow.
I wouldn't tell her I was in London for a few days, making it seem like I was going there a few days after leaving her instead of right away. I felt like if I told her I was immediately flying to London she would be much more anxious about the long distance thing than if I slowly eased it in.
I already hadn't told her I had originally been in London before I came to visit for Ender's birthday.
She sent me back an okay with a little smiley face and I set my phone to airplane mode.
The flight as always was hell, and it was even worse when it meant I was flying farther and farther away from her. Sydney was 11 hours ahead of London so that meant I would have to be on a weird schedule for a few days until I made it seem like I was flying to London.
There were more people outside the airport when I finally touched down in the UK and security escorted me through the back and straight into a black car.
The driver already knew to take me to the hotel the boys and I were staying at, and took me around back to avoid the mob of teenage girls that surrounded the front doors of the five star building.
Quickly I ducked into the building and made my way up to my shared room with Calum.
He was laying on the bed in only his boxers and socks on, scrolling through his phone.
"Hey, how was the party?" He asked as I walked in, sitting up a little bit.
"It was good." I yawned, throwing my bag down.
"You look like shit." Calum commented as I flung myself down onto my bed.
"I feel like shit." I replied.
"I'm going to take a wild guess and say you didn't tell her?" He said obviously.
"Nope." I sighed.
"Man, you gotta stop. I don't know why you didn't just tell her in the first place." He shook his head.
"Because I wanted her to like me for me, not because I was famous." I groaned.
"Carter wouldn't've cared if you were famous. She obviously liked you for you. And if she didn't know you were famous before then why would she have cared when you told her, if you would've told her?"
"I don't know, Calum, okay? I don't know. I don't know how to tell her now and it literally makes me feel like I'm going to throw up every time I think about it." I whined and shoved my head into the pillow.
The door creaked open and I heard Michael and Luke walk in, knowing full well I was going to get chewed out by them as well.
Calum sat there while they asked me the same questions as he did on how the trip went before sitting down on the bed, then he filled them in when they asked if I had told her.
"You know, there's never going to be a right time to tell her." Michael commented. "You're going to have to just do it and get it over with, like ripping off a bandaid."
"Wait, I have a question, what do you expect to happen after you tell her?" Luke asked.
"I don't know, in a perfect world she would be okay with it and come on tour with us, and we would be fine, but this obviously isn't a perfect world so I don't know. I guess it all depends on how she reacts." I shrugged slightly. "I don't want to talk about this anymore tonight guys, sorry." I grabbed my phone and checked the time. It would be around lunch time for Carter.
"Where are you going?" Calum asked as I began to walk towards the door.
"To call Carter." I mumbled and walked out, shutting the door loudly behind me.
Leaning up against the hallway wall, I pressed her contact name and the phone began to ring. It rang about four times before it went to voicemail.
"Hey you've reached Carter Chase. Leave a message and I'll get back to you. Have a great day!"
She sounded younger in the recording which made me smile a little.
Instead of leaving a voicemail, I hung up and slid my phone in my pocket, going back into the room, deciding to call her back later.
--
I really enjoy writing the chapters from Ashton's PoV.
I have most of the next chapter finished and I will have it up soon, pre-warning it's going to be very dramatic so get ready. lol I was felt like i was on a roller coaster just writing it haha
Oh! and attached is a picture of what I envision Ashton looking like in this story.
as always I hope you enjoyed this part and vote and comment if you'd like and I just might do a double update tonight or update again tomorrow(: much love xx -M