"Baby?" Harper pointed to Kim's stomach as they waited in the lobby, "twos of them?" she held up a finger on each hand.
"Yes, baby two" Kim said as she ran her hand over the ever growing bump, she was six months pregnant and felt like she was as big as a house. She checked her phone again, still nothing from Adam. Her appointment was in fifteen minutes and she was hoping he would make it, she dreaded having to bring Harper in the exam room by herself it was almost impossible for her to carry Harper and the little girl was a handful on her best day.
Finally the door swung open, Adam rushing in "Hey Darlin', I'm sorry I'm late" he hoped she wouldn't notice the swelling near his eye having gone to fisticuffs with a suspect, "Where's daddy's favorite girl?"
"Right here silly!" Harper laughed when Adam picked her up.
"What happened to your eye?" Kim asked him.
"Ah, it's nothing" Adam told her breathing a sigh of relief when they were called back.
"Alright, let's take a look at these two" the doctor said as he started the ultrasound, no longer leaving it to the technician he wanted to keep a close eye on the two little ones. The sharing of the placenta could lead to complications and he was hoping it wouldn't be the case for the Ruzek twins.
Kim found these appointments to be stressful, she still couldn't kick the uneasy feeling she had, Adam telling her she was being silly. That it was fine, the only surprise was the fact they would be getting 'two for the price of one' as Adam had so eloquently put it. Once he got over that shock that is, it took a few weeks but he warmed up to the idea and was thrilled at the thought of having twins.
Adam sat with Harper in his lap and Kim's hand entwined with his, "you're going to get to see your baby brothers or sisters" he told her, the doctor confident these babies would be identical.
"They coming out?" Harper asked, her language had seemingly developed overnight and she now talked non-stop.
"Not yet, but they'll be on the tv" the doctor told her.
He quietly worked as the images filled the screen, it was what first tipped Adam off to something not being quite right, but he kept it to himself not wanting to scare Kim.
He kept checking the measurements of both babies, and alternating between the iPad and the ultrasound monitor, he quickly turned the lights on, "Excuse me for just a mintue" he left the room without another word, the image of their babies frozen on the screen.
"Do you think something is wrong with the babies, Adam?" Kim asked.
"I don't know, try not to worry" Adam told her, trying to calm his own fears.
The door opened, the doctor returning with an older doctor who both Adam and Kim recognized as the senior doctor in the practice and a nurse.
The nurse kneeled in front of Harper, "Hey sweetie, why don't you come with me for a minute let mommy and daddy talk with the doctors, okay?"
She asked softly, trying to keep from scaring both Harper and her parents.
Harper looked back at Kim, "Go on, it's okay" though she was certain it wasn't, not even close to being okay. Instinctively she reached out for Adam's hand, Harper already having followed the nurse out of the room.
"Doc, what's going on?" Adam asked as he stood beside Kim.
The older doctor spoke "Hi, I'm Dr.Weatherspoon, It seems we have found something that is worrisome" he had only seen a few cases with this condition in all his years, "I would like to perform another ultrasound, is that okay?"
"Of course" Kim said quickly, already feeling her heart rate rise, another nurse coming in to take her vitals.
Adam was instantly terrified, "you have to tell us what's going on"
"We will, just give me a few more minutes" Dr.Weatherspoon told her as he performed the test, and noting the measurements.
Adam leaned forward and kissed Kim's forehead, "it's gonna be okay" he whispered in her ear, hoping he wasn't lying to his wife.
Dr. Weatherspoon nodded at his colleague, he left the room, "I'm going to be taking over this case, it's become very high risk" he said softly, "I'm sorry"
"What's wrong?" Adam asked, Kim already near tears, "please?"
The door opened again, the other doctor returning with papers in his hand.
"Kim, Adam, I'm afraid your boys have a serious condition known as twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome" he handed them the papers.
"Boys?" Kim said softly.
"I'm sorry, I assumed you knew"
"We didn't" Adam told him, "this twin to twin whatever, what is it? Are my sons going to be okay?" Kim's grip on his hand tightening.
"I want to admit you over night, we need to run a lot of tests, but a simple explanation is one of your boys isn't getting enough blood and the other is getting too much" he hated giving such dire news, "It's serious, but right now both your boys seem to be okay"
"You got to give me more than that doc" Adam said raising his voice, "you can't drop news like this and tell me they seem to be okay! That's not good enough!"
"Adam calm down" Kim said, "I don't understand, what caused it? What did I do wrong?"
"Absolutely nothing, this is a fluke occurrence you didn't cause it and you couldn't have prevented it"
Adam sat back down, "Well, how do we treat it?"
"Listen, Adam, you need to take your daughter home and come back up here" Dr.Weatherspoon said knowing he needed to sit them both down and lay it all on the line, and he didn't want to do that when Harper was with them.
"No, I'm not leaving my wife" Adam said.
Kim grabbed his hand, "Go, Adam. Take Harper to your dad and Amy, Anthony too. I will be okay" she told him wiping her eyes, "please go"
Adam nodded, "Okay, I will be right back. I love you" he kissed her softly, "our boys will be okay, they're strong like their mom" he fought the lump he could feel forming in his throat.
She smiled, unable to speak.
A million thoughts raced through this mind as he waited for Anthony to arrive in the office at The Lawton Academy, "Is everything okay, Officer Ruzek?" The secretary asked sensing something was off with the usually loquacious man.
"Uh, um, yea" he shifted Harper on his hip, "Just need to get back to my wife" afraid if he started to explain he'd lose it.
"Hey Daddy!" Anthony hugged his legs, "where's mommy?"
"The doctor, I'm going to take you to grandma and grandpa's okay?"
"Yay!" Anthony smiled oblivious to the distress Adam was in.
"Hey Adam" Amy let them in, "give me my girlie!"
She took Harper from his arms, "You okay?"
Adam shook his head, "No, but I can't talk right now. I need to get back to Kim. Can they spend the night?"
Amy was terrified, "Yea, sure. Is Kim okay?"
"Can I call you in a little while?" Adam asked her, already half way out the door.
"Of course" she hugged him, "I love you"
He smiled, "I love you too"
Kim had been transferred to the hospital when Adam returned, "I have to go Phil, Adam is back" she said softly, "thanks, I love you too" she wiped her eyes, stifling a sob.
"Oh, please don't cry" he rushed to her side, "has the doctor been in?"
She wiped her eyes with a tissue, "No, I'm scared Adam"
He wheeled the stool over and sat down, "I am too, but our boys are tough they're Ruzek men after all" a hint of a smile appearing but not reaching his eyes.
"Did you tell Amy?"
"I didn't, just told her I would call her soon" he didn't have the courage to say it out loud that if he didn't mention it, it wasn't real "She said the kids could spend the night"
A knock on the door interrupted them, a group of five doctors coming inside, letting Adam know the severity of it all.
Dr.Weatherspoon spoke first, "This is our NICU team, I've brought them up to speed on what we are dealing with" he sat down and put his iPad down, "This is what we knew, your boys are sharing the same blood supply, Baby B is the donor, meaning he's sending more blood to baby A and not receiving enough for him develop properly, his amniotic sac is low on fluid because his urine output is also decreased" he paused, "Baby A is receiving too much blood and we are concerned about his heart being stressed"
"Oh my god" Kim brought her hand to cover her mouth, "are they going to.." Unable to finish her thoughts.
"We'd like to get them to at least 28 weeks, but ideally 30 weeks would be the best situation" another doctor said.
"Alright, how do we treat it? Medicine?" Adam asked already trying to put a plan in place.
"Adam, it's not that simple" the doctor said softly, "this is serious, we do have some options but each one carries its own risk"
Adam slammed his hand on the counter, "Damn it! I need some answers, these are my kids" his voice trailing off, "you need to help my children" he thought for a minute, " is Kim in any danger?"
Kim shook her head, "Don't worry about me, I don't care what I have to do my babies are going to be okay. Even if I'm not" she said.
"Don't talk like that, I need you"
"Kim, you aren't at risk at this point"
Adam wiped his eyes, "what are the odds?"
"I don't like to discuss odds, just know we are doing all we can for those babies"
"I need the odds, Doc"
Dr. Weatherspoon sighed, "Right this minute? It's fifty fifty they both survive, but every week we get get closer to the thirty weeks those odds improve" he watched as they processed the news.
"Jesus" Adam went to the window, his palms on the window sill, he exhaled "what do we do?"
Kim sat quietly in the bed, her hands covering her stomach.
"Keep the faith, and know we are doing all we can for your boys. Our goal is to deliver two beautiful boys and right now I don't see why that can't happen" he knew he needed to be optimistic for them, and for himself.
He looked at the solemn faces of his team, it was never easy delivering news like this, "We will leave you two alone, don't hesitate to call us if you have any questions"
Both Adam and Kim just nodded, neither one able to speak.
The ringing of Adam's phone disrupting the quiet, he checked the caller ID, "It's Kevin" he went to dismiss the call.
"No, answer it" Kim told Adam, "it could be about work"
"I don't wanna talk"
"Damn it Adam, answer the phone!" she was surprised by her outburst.
"Hey Kevin" Adam answered, stopping into the hallway.
Kevin put his gun in his holster, "We just caught a heater, Boss wants to know where you are"
Adam went outside, the fresh air hitting him he went a sat on a bench over looking the hospital's playground, "Kim's in the hospital"
"Ah, shit. Is she okay? Is it the babies"
Adam hunched over, "I'm scared Kev, they have this twin-to-twin thing" he paused, "they share the same blood supply and one of them isn't getting enough while the other is getting too much"
Kevin waved Jay and Sean over, he pointed at the desk for them to sit down, "Are they gonna be okay?"
This was the part Adam struggled with, "It's fifty fifty man, my boys could die" those words are what did him in, he was no longer able to keep his emotions in check.
"Forget us, I will tell Voight. I will check up on you as soon as I can, tell Kim I love her" he ended the call.
"What's wrong with Kim?" Sean asked, "what's going on?"
Kevin leaned against the wall, "The twins have some condition" he was shocked, "it's bad, Adam said it's fifty fifty"
Jay stood, "I will tell Voight" he stood pulling his phone out and sent off a quick text message to Erin, he knew Kim would need all the support she could get.
"Grandpa's home!" Anthony yelled, "can we eat now?" He asked.
She quickly filled their plates with food, "Sure, go on. I need to talk to grandpa"
Amy met Bob at the door, "Oh, Bob!" She flung herself into his arms, she had no clue what was going on with Kim but Adam's demeanor was enough to clue her in to the severity of whatever it was.
"What's wrong?" Bob asked as he set his gym bag down, "why are the rug rats here"
"Something is wrong with Kim, Adam didn't elaborate.
"I'm gonna call him" he was already making the call.
Amy listened with intent, wishing the phone was on speaker. Judging my Bob's varying facial expressions she knew it was serious. She was quiet until Bob sat down and ended the call with an 'I love you' and a request to be kept updated.
"What is it?"
"Sit down" he patted the couch, "where are the kids?"
"Eating. Tell me what Adam said"
Bob filled her in, his stomach sick.
"This is awful" she said as she melted into Bob's arms.
"Yes, it is. But we need to pull it together for those two" he pointed to the dining room, "you think you can do that?"
She wiped her eyes, "I'm going to have to, won't I?"
"What did Kevin want?" She asked when Adam returned, she could tell he had been crying but ignored it.
"Unit caught a heater" he said softly.
"You better get going"
Adam faced her, "I'm not leaving, already told them that" he sat in the chair, "when are they doing the tests?"
"You should go to work, nothing you can do here"
"I'm not going, I'm not leaving you" he told her.
"Boss" Jay said as he stood in the office, "Ruzek is out, Kim's in the hospital"
Hank put the file down, "What's up?"
"Not really sure but it's bad, doctors said it's fifty fifty that the babies make it" he jammed his hands in his pockets, "Erin is on her way, she'll get us a better update.
"What can I do for you? Do you feel okay?" Adam asked Kim, unsure of what to do.
"I'm fine Adam" she was cold and unattached, "I wish you would go to work, instead of hovering over me" she wanted to be alone, to scream and yell and cry.
"What?" He felt like she kicked him in the gut, "I can't leave you"
Erin appeared in the doorway, her bottom lip beginning to tremble, "Kim?"
Kim held her hand out, both women in tears, "I'm gonna take a walk" Adam said as he left the room.
Annie couldn't run fast enough, she had barely ended the conversation with Amy when she raced in the car. Now, it was like slow motion. The only spot she found to park in was at the back of the parking lot, she locked the car up and made her way to the door, it felt like miles.
Adam needed air, he needed to be free of the hospital room and the look on Kim's face. The doctor's voice still bouncing around in his head, he wished he could turn back the clock and have it be when his twins were fine, not fighting for their lives before they even left the womb.
"Adam!" Annie called out, she saw him standing by the fountain, "Adam, what's going on?"
Adam spun on his heels, and pulled his sister into his arms, "the babies could die" was all he could say before losing it
"How are you?" Erin asked, knowing how stupid it sounded. She was pretty sure she knew how Kim was, and it wasn't good.
"In shock" Kim replied, her hands resting on her stomach as if she could will her boys to make it, "they're boys"
"I heard" she patted Kim's hand, "they'll be okay, they're strong like you and Adam"
"It's my fault, this is all my fault"
Erin grabbed her hand, she had googled what Kim was dealing with and knew that wasn't the case, "No, it's not. I don't want you to say that ever again"
"It's karma" she said softly, "for what I did to Katrina and her boyfriend. Why do my children have to pay for my actions?" tears sliding down her cheeks.
"Just stop" Erin handed her a tissue, "this isn't your fault, nothing you did caused this"
The doctor came in the room, "We need to go down stairs for some tests"
"Adam. I need Adam" Kim said.
"I'm sorry, your husband won't be able to come" he told her.
Erin released Kim's hand, "I will find him and tell him, okay? I love you" she could see the fear on Kim's face, "they're strong Kim, and so are you"
Erin sat in the chair, finally letting herself feel her emotions no longer needing to be strong for Kim, she sent Jay a text giving him an update.
"Where's Kim?" Adam asked when he and Annie returned to her room.
"The doctor took her downstairs for some tests, he said it shouldn't be too long" she hugged him, "let us help you both, Jay said he would be here soon"
The next week flew by, Kim had numerous appointments and scans, they had done a procedure in which they had drawn fluid from baby A's amniotic sac and it seemed to help some.
The house was filled with tension, Amy having spent most of the day at the house helping with Harper and Anthony.
Adam trying to keep himself occupied by day and seemed lost at night, neither one could bring up the boys both scared, never having been this scared in their lives.
As they lay in bed that night, Kim brought it up "Names, we need to give them names" she let it hang in the air before she spoke again, "just in case".
Adam looked at her, "Don't you dare say it, they're going to be fine. Both of them will be and we will name them once their here" unwilling to even consider any other outcome then two healthy boys.
Kim could feel her eyes well up, "I can't lost them Adam, I just can't"
He immediately pulled her against his chest, "you're not going to, they are going to grow, get stronger and both of them will be born. We will look back on this a few years from now and smile at how our boys are survivors" he kissed her head, "try and rest"
She jolted up in a bed, a pain racing through her abdomen, "Adam!" She shook his shoulder, trying to fight through the pain, "Adam!" She yelled again clutching her stomach.
Adam rolled over, "yea?" His voice thick with sleep, "what time is it?"
"Somethings wrong, it hurts" she cried hunched over, "call an ambulance, please" she knew it was serious.