Ask Loki, The God of Mischief

By TomHiddlesLoki

147K 3.3K 1.6K

Greetings Mortals. As part of my punishment in Asgard for attempting to do something useful with your race, m... More

Ask The God of Mischief
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fourth question

3.2K 104 157
By TomHiddlesLoki

Q:

marlomariel: Given the chance, would you kill Thor if you could?Would you rather lick an elephant's but or lick peanut butter off a hobo's foot?

A:

Mortal,

If I had the sweet chance to kill Thor, I would gladly tak it. That mewling baby deserves it and has it coming. I absolutely detest that oaf and cant stand the mere sight of him!!

(Thor- hey thats rude! Im your brother for Odin's sake!!!! tell the truth brother!!!)

No. I wouldnt be able to. After all, I grew up with him. Damn you Thor for making me show them my "soft side". Though I would come very very very very very very close to ending his miserable existence.

(Thor- you know you love me:)_)

Deep down somewhere in my heart, I may have a slight, miniscule, small bit of affection for you. brother, but that is all.

Anyway, back to the question,

I am not familiar with Midgard's beasts but I am sure it would not please me to lick an "elephant's" hind quarters. I do not know what this mortal substinance called "peanut butter" is. Im sure it tastes repulsive. As for licking it off a "hobo's" foot, There is no such word in Asguard therefore I haven't the slightest idea of what a "hobo" is.

(Thor- I can look it up for you, brother)

Hang on a minute while I search for these strage words/creatures.............................................................

..............................................................................................

I.HAVE.NO.ANSWER.FOR.THAT.PATHETIC.AND.QUITE.DISTURBING.QUESTION.

Why in Odin's beard would you even ask me that??

(Thor- that is not a valid answer little brother)

An elephant's posterior looks quite disturbing so assuming peanut butter isnt as repulsive as I think, I'll lick it off a hobo's foot. THough really, I have servants who can do that for me.

(Thor- uh, no you dont, you're locked up in a cell)

Stop reminding me Thor.

~Loki Laufeyson

(Thor- you meen Loki Odinson. You are my brother)

not really brother, I will always be Laufeyson.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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EDITED ON JUNE 4, 2022 After Ragnorok Loki lost his throne once again, but that didn't stop him. While his brother was in space far away with the Asg...