"I found solace in the strangest place
Way in the back of my mind"
The buzzing in my ears wouldn't quit. I frowned, disturbed from my sleep. I turned my head towards the noise but a white light blinded me behind my eyelids.
Disorientated, I blinked, but it hurt. My headache lessened when I closed them again.
Groggy and confused, I ran a hand down my face blindly, frowning as my hand met a plastic tube under my nose. I fiddled with it, eyes still closed – too afraid to see where I was. Or what it was.
A hand came from nowhere and tugged my own away. Startled, I slapped it away harshly. The fog clouding my mind cleared instantly and I shot away, eyes opening to a blur as I ripped away the offending plastic. Avoiding the reaching hands I scrambled to the other side of the room, sinking to the floor with my hands above my head protectively.
I should not have hit them. They would hit me worse. What have I done?
I didn't take note of where I was, too afraid to look up. The floor felt clinically clean and smooth, I could see the bright light shining off it. I couldn't move, even though my hands were hurting in this tense position and my body was shaking. My neck strained and screamed for me to look up.
Everything ached but I didn't dare move.
"Dad...." I heard someone say, a girl, voice unsure.
"I'll get the doctor, stay here." He replied, it was surely a man, and one I recognised although my memories were jumbled in my mind. Their scents weren't familiar. In fact this whole room smelt foreign, I panicked more. Why am I here?
Soft footsteps treaded lightly toward me and I whimpered, clutching my head tightly, almost ripping out my hair.
Please don't hurt me.
"Hey," she said, voice soft, but she was too close. She reached out a hand to pry my own from my hair but I reacted violently, flinching away to smack against the wall. I clutched my legs tighter to my chest. My breaths were picking up as she hovered, preparing for punishment for my actions.
I ran away. Oh god. I ran away.
I felt sick.
They were going to kill me.
But I ran.
Into new territory.
They'd take me back, or punish me themselves. I gasped for air like I was drowning, I remember the feeling well. There was a lake, nearby the pack, they threw me in. Panic surged forward even further in recollection, reliving my panic, my pain.
"Hazel, I'm going to need you to step away, she's having a panic attack and she needs space." A woman asked, her voice calm and collected. I couldn't look up, my neck was stiff with tension.
The girl stepped away, her feet shuffling against the floor, the sound only alarmed me further.
"Thank you," the calm voice said, "Okay. Do we have a name?"
"No." A male voice replied. I took note of their feet through a gap between my knees and arms. There were three people here. And metal legs, lining the walls, I assumed they were beds but I didn't try to seek confirmation.
"Alright," the lady said, "I'm a doctor, and I'm here to help you." This part seemed to be addressed to me. Why?
"You're going to need to calm down and take deep breaths."
I tried, I really did, but I couldn't calm. It made me panic more, my head spinning dizzily. I've had panic attacks before and they always ended the same way, with me passed out. The pack never minded it.
"Deep breaths. Can you count them out with me? 1, 2, 3, 4...in and out...1,2,3,4. You are in a hospital." I listened to her voice, slowly unravelling. "1, 2, 3, 4, 5...in and out...1, 2, 3, 4, 5. My name is Dr. Alison. Can you count all the way to six?"
I found I could and we kept going all the way until eight. It worked like magic and Dr. Alison told me there were three people here, Hazel, herself and Ebo. My breathing was normal, but my body was tense and I still refused to look up.
"What's your name?" Dr. Alison asked, keeping a respectful distance away. It confused me and I sought the answer to her question in my mind. I didn't want to tell them, but I didn't know what they would do if I refused.
"E-Eden." I stammered, keeping my hands around my knees, but raised my head an inch so she could hear me.
"Alright, Eden. We're all friendly here, don't worry, we're not going to hurt you."
I didn't reply. Should I have done?
A soft thump made my head raise in fear to see a pretty teenage girl opposite me. Her legs were crossed, she was on the floor, the same as me, but she was beaming. Her hair was finely braided, and woven elegantly into a twisted crown atop her head. The rest of the box braids fell gently across her shoulders.
I recognised her as the same girl who found me in the forest. From a quick glimpse I could see that the man was too.
"Hey," she said, softly, her warm brown eyes watching me closely, "My name's Hazel."
She waited, presumably so I could reply, but all I could manage was a small nod.
"I'm 16," she continued, "But I'm small, and my cheeks are round, so some people think I'm 12," she rolled her eyes at that, "I live here at the pack with my father," she pointed at the man, Ebo, who stood behind her, "But also my mother and my four brothers. We've all been very safe in this pack and our Alpha takes very good care of us."
I was still cautious of my surroundings, but the longer she talked the less tense my muscles became.
"How old are you?" She asked, curious, "When's your birthday?" Her head was cocked to the side and eyes brows raised in question.
"I, uh," I answered, hesitant,"I'm 18."
I could tell her that much, but I frowned, trying to remember when my birthday was. When the last time the Alpha hissed in my ear that it was the worst day of his life. 2 months ago, maybe the 20th? May? "20th May."
"Hey, awesome! Mine's the 20th June! Exactly a month apart." She sounded genuinely happy to know that, and her smile was wide and encouraging. But yet, I was confused and wanted to shrink back even further against the wall. I didn't know what these people wanted.
Her father, Ebo, crouched down to my level also, a small frown on his face. He was evidently strong, muscles coiled across his broad shoulders, his t-shirt stressed and muscles rippled under the dark, brown skin exposed.
I eyed him warily, hiding behind my hair. I couldn't fight off any of them.
"You look younger than 18." He observed with concern.
"And my assesments agree," The doctor commented. My eyes shot up towards her, finding she looked younger than I thought.
Her blonde hair was drawn back into a pony tail, a white coat shrouded her figure. She had the same concerned look as Ebo in her eyes. They were green, like mine.
"Which pack did you come from?" Ebo asked. I shook my head, clutching my knees to my chest. I couldn't tell them. They'd take me back. My heart sped up again and I fought for breath.
"Calm down, Eden. It's okay. I need you to stand up and take a seat on the bed so I can examine you properly. You are only damaging yourself." Dr. Alison ordered.
I realised it was the first time since Maple that I had heard my name.
Still, my eyes widened at her command. Afraid to disobey, I hesitantly rose to my feet, my eyes downcast and hair shielding my face as I trudged past her and sat on the bed I had previously vacated. She smiled encouragingly. They all did. It was strange, who did they think I was? Have they mistaken me for someone else? Surely I was just a rogue to them?
There must be another agenda.
I bit my lip and looked at the floor, where a trail of blood splatters threw me off guard. Dr. Alison looked toward them as well and turned back to me.
"You ripped out the IV when you ran," she told me calmly, "And also the oxygen aid, but the removal of the IV caused the blood loss. I need to apply pressure and bandage your arm."
She reached behind her to a drawer and took out a bandage, grasping my arm firmly. I flinched although she didn't let go. I shook, but she murmured soothing words as she tightly wound the bandage. I didn't like it, but I couldn't protest and she was finished quickly.
"Now," she said, as a matter of fact, "When Ebo and Hazel found you had a few broken ribs, significant blood loss, a sprained ankle and several worrying cuts and bruises. You've been in a medically induced coma for three weeks. We've been waiting for your wolf to heal you, but we made the call yesterday to wake you up."
I blanched, looking up at her in surprise. I've never been out for that long or ever been so vulnerable like that. They could have done anything to me. Maybe they had already notified my pack and they were on their way to make sure I stayed dead.
"Your ankle has healed somewhat but I don't recommend running." She continued, alarming me with her choice of words, "The ribs are fine and nothing has been punctured. Although the bleeding was quite extensive, you reacted well to our transfusion and we have observed no further issues. You have a few deep cuts that are still healing, but mostly you are healthy, well, not as much as I'd like but you're better. The bruises should go down naturally, although you had a nasty one of your jaw that went down yesterday."
She seemed like she really cared for my well being.
"Why look after me? Aren't I a rogue?" I wondered, somewhat boldly.
"I'm a doctor, why wouldn't I care?" she asked, incredulous. I shrugged slightly, feeling sore, avoiding her gaze. She told me I was healed, but I felt so tired and worn. I was also devastatingly thirsty but didn't dare ask for a drink. People don't like it when I ask for things, or any question.
I decided to stay quiet.
"You won't need the IV now that you're awake or the oxygen anymore. So you're free to leave the hospital wing. Although I need you to come back here for check-ups and any further problems. You're pretty torn up and as a doctor you're circumstances worry me. The minimal wolf activity in your healing process is also concerning, is the connection damaged?"
Her words cut deep when I realised that yes, the connection was damaged. I didn't know what to do about that, my wolf abandoned me, not the other way round.
"I see." She said, noting my devastated look, "Sometimes it happens when the human is too weak to accommodate for a wolf's needs as well. Your body was pretty damaged, it may be hard for your wolf too."
She said it. I was too weak.
I knew that already.
"Have some water." She ordered, pointing to a glass on a table beside me, and left my bed to tend to another patient I hadn't even realised was in the room. I tentatively took a sip from the cold glass, but the thirst overwhelmed me and I gulped it all down.
"We'll take you to the Alpha." Ebo informed me, "He knows you're here, so it won't be a surprise. Do not worry, he's promised to listen to your story. He won't hurt you."
He gestured for me to follow him.
I didn't want to and I dragged my feet, trying to prolong the inevitable.
They'd take me back and then I'd be killed.
"Hey, don't worry so much," Hazel reassured me, "Everything is going to be fine."
The thought suddenly struck me that I had no idea which pack territory I was currently in. She noted my look.
"Ask," she said, "Whatever you want to, you look worried."
"W-which pack is this?" I asked, still afraid, even of a girl younger than me.
"The Volana Pack."
I stopped in my tracks, fear freezing me on the spot. Of all the packs I could have run to, it had to be this one. The pack my old one despised, one of the most powerful rival packs in the country. They're rumoured to be cruel and relentless, even more terrible than my old one. I find the idea horrific to comprehend. They capture other packs and force them to work for them, they torture, they-
"It's okay, Eden, we're all good." Hazel said, trying to be comforting.
I didn't believe her. Maybe its all a trap. They'd be happy to dump me back with their enemy pack.
"You must see the Alpha. He is waiting." Ebo commanded, his voice serious and left no room for discussion. I was used to being ordered around and so gritted my teeth and prepared once more for more pain. The feeling of dread was not new to me.
We left the small hospital and stepped out into fresh, bitter air. I realised I was wearing new clothes, a grey tank top and loose shorts; clothing had not been on the forefront of my mind. The lack of material exposed my bruises and scars, I looked down, ashamed when I saw all the ogles and glances of passing pack members.
What must they think of me?
I was used to scorn, at least.
The walk was longer than I had anticipated and my feet were bare, leaving me exposed to the leaves and twigs of the forest floor at my feet. The pack lands bordered the countryside and the edge of the forest, although I knew this territory was so much larger than my old pack's.
We stopped at a big, elaborate house, which I knew would be the pack house. The outside was paved with grey and black bricks, the pattern broken by white windows and pillars. There was no time to ogle, though, as I was ushered inside.
The interior of the building was no less impressive, a sparking chandelier hung proudly in the entry way, which was sizable but not cavernous. A soft white carpet soothed my feet as I shuffled along behind Ebo and his daughter, fear beginning to clutch at my heart and anxiety fluttering around my insides.
The house smelt nice and comforting, causing something inside me to awaken with...desire? No, I chastised myself - that was completely inaccurate. The railings held more of the scent and some carnal desire wanted me to sniff it shamelessly, craving that heavenly scent. It clung to particular items and only intensified when we reached the top of the winding stairs to arrive on a landing.
I was led down a corridor to the far end, where double doors awaited me.
The Alpha's office.
My nerves were scrambled, equal parts of me cowering away and others seeking to follow the scent and burst into the room.
"Go on." Hazel said, smiling at me as her father knocked on the door.
"Come in." Came the muffled reply, which scent a flurry of nerves flittering in my stomach. I wasn't sure whether it was anxiety or this new found craving. It was muddling and wreaking havoc on my panicked state of mind. I just wanted to run.
Ebo opened the door and I followed timidly behind.
The interior of the office was surprisingly comforting, so unlike Alpha Jackson's. It was furnished beautifully, with oakwood bookcases lining the walls and a squishy red rug underfoot. The desk was a masterpiece of cherry wood, smooth and polished with books in disarray upon it. A globe spun lazily atop a stack of books in the corner.
A man, big and scary, stood facing the window, obviously in deep thought. His broad shoulders were relaxed, but as soon as I stepped even an inch forward, he tensed and whipped around.
My breath hitched in both fear and admiration.
I was stood watching this man, caught and lost in his gaze, my mind frozen entirely.
A voice rang clearly inside my head, unbidden and unfamiliar, but yet I knew this was my wolf.
'Mate'