-Everly
The sound of paper being cut echoes throughout my apartment as I add another clipping to my steadily growing stack.
I have at least a dozen already, all articles relating to Meredith's death. Ones from early on when she had been reported as missing down to one printed just a couple months ago.
I place them all neatly inside the small wooden box set on my coffee table before picking up the picture of her I'd kept.
So far they hadn't missed it. When I returned the envelope to Margo, I'd pulled the picture out last minute.
I just couldn't let it go.
There was something about it, about her soft smile. Like she was asking me to help her.
I don't know why, but for some reason I felt if I solved her murder, if I could prove Carter did it.. Then I could someone guarantee I wouldn't end up just like her.
A smiling woman in a picture who'd all of a sudden disappeared. Only to be found months later along the bank of the East River.
I remember hearing about it on the news. I'd been headed to the museum, stopped off to grab a hot tea for my walk there. It was playing on the TV hanging over the counter at my favorite coffee shop.
A beautiful young heiress found dead wasn't something that happened every day in New York. It was national news.
It was months later I'd met Carter. After a few dates he told me the story of how his beloved wife never came home one summer night. How he searched for her endlessly, exhausting every resource available to him.
He played the part of a grieving widower well. So well I couldn't help but to want to comfort this gorgeous sweet man who was deeply hurting.
With all the things I know Carter has been involved in, I still didn't think he would be capable of such a thing as sentencing his own wife to death.
So when I read those words printed across the back of her picture, I was shocked.
Carter has threatened me before, but I never really thought it was any more then just that. A threat.
Something to scare me into doing exactly what he wanted. A tactic he uses on almost everyone he wants to control.
He professed to love me after all. Even if I didn't truly believe him, he was adamant about it. I naively thought that meant he wouldn't ever go so far as carrying out one of his threats.
But now, after knowing that he most likely behind his own wife's disappearance, behind her death... I realize they aren't really threats at all. They were promises.
I lay the picture of Meredith down on top of the news paper clippings, closing the lid to the box and sliding it under my couch.
Laying back against the cushions, I close my eyes and rub my temples.
From everything I'd read, Carter and Meredith had been a happy couple. Always loving towards each other at public outings, their affections never seeming forced.
Her own family insisted there was no way Carter had anything to do with her disappearance. They were adamant in their belief he could be nothing but innocent, that he had loved her dearly.
At one time maybe he did. Maybe he professed his love to her on a daily basis as he does to me.
But something changed.
Why did he need to get rid of her? What had she done? What had she not done? What had she found out?
So many questions swarm through my mind, none of them with any kind of answer. They'd all vanished with her on that August night.
But I was determined to find them.
My eyes drift towards the clock hanging on the wall, and I jump up when I notice what time it is.
I'm supposed to be meeting Carter at a charity event in less then an hour and a half and I haven't even started getting ready.
I hurry through a shower and blowing out my hair, knowing what his reaction would be if I was late. If there's one thing Carter loathes, it's having to wait on someone.
Pulling on the soft pink dress I decided on, I do my best at pushing all thoughts of Meredith to the back of my mind. I can't give off any signs of how this new information has affected me. Or how it's affected my view of Carter.
I still have a part to play, and its more important then ever I do so flawlessly. Not showing the slightest hint of how I really feel about him or how frightened of him I truly am.
I adjust the hat on my head before I step into the warm New York air and hold my hand up to hail a taxi.
It doesn't take long before one is pulling up to the curb in front of my building, stopping next to me. I slide into the backseat, giving the driver the address to the venue the event is being held at.
Another night of fake smiles. Of pretending to adore a man I actually despise. Of somehow talking my way out of having to go home with him.
I sigh, already feeling tired when the night hasn't even really started.
Tired.. I almost laugh at the simple word that explains how I feel towards my complicated life.
I'm tired of being Carter's toy. I'm tired of being Margo's puppet. I'm tired of not getting to make my own decisions. I'm tired of not doing what I want.
I can't even remember the last time I actually did something I wanted to. When I had the freedom to make choices for myself.
I'm so tired of all of it.
"You okay Miss?" The driver asks from the front seat.
"Yes, thank you." I give him a quick smile as he glances at me in the rear view mirror.
Apparently I'm already not doing a great job tonight at seeming carefree and happy.
He nods, turning his full attention back to the road as my phone dings.
I open my clutch, pulling out my cell to find Carter's name on the screen.
Anxiety hits me as I check the time, worried I'm already late.
When I see I still have fifteen minutes, I unlock my phone to read the message...
An important meeting came up, our plans for this evening are cancelled. We will have lunch tomorrow together, I will see you then.
I shake my head, relieved yet annoyed at the same time. Relieved I'm not having to spend tonight with him, yet annoyed there wasn't so much as an I'm sorry in the rude message.
Just another demand, informing me that having lunch with him tomorrow is yet another thing I don't have a say in. Another choice made for me.
I keep myself from typing out the response I would like to send, instead writing out what he would expect his loving girlfriend to.. Hope your meeting goes well. I'll see you tomorrow.
I bite my bottom lip as my fingers hover over my phone, hesitating. Throwing caution and common sense to the wind, I type out a new text, sending it before I can think twice... Busy tonight?
I hold my breath, narrowing my eyes at my phone. I shouldn't of done that. That was stupid.
I'm being so stupid.
I nearly drop my phone as it buzzes in my hands, already having received a reply to my foolish question.
As luck would have it, no.
I stare at the words, inwardly cursing myself for how excited I'm getting from just looking at them.
My phone beeps again as another message comes through.
You just curious about how I spend my time or you wanting me to spend that time with you? Would prefer it to be the last half, in case you're wondering.
A small smile plays on my lips as I type out a reply... How do you feel about milkshakes?
Like I need one at present. You?
Same. Breakroom, corner of Canal and Centre in forty minutes?
Make it thirty. See you soon.
I grin, shutting off my phone and telling the driver my change of plans. I quickly pop the back off, removing the battery before dropping all three pieces of my phone back into my clutch.
Tonight, for once, I'm doing what I want.
I know it's unwise and most likely even crazy, but it's my decision. My choice.
Mine.
I pass the driver a few bills when we arrive at Breakroom, sliding out of the backseat. My heart flutters in my chest as I step inside the small cafe.
After looking around and not spotting Harry's mop of brown hair, I take a seat at the bar. I've been here quite a few times before, it being one of Harper and I's favorite places to grab a burger after a long day of classes.
It feels like it's part of my real life, not being associated with Carter in any way. That is, until Harry walks in the door I guess.
I shake the thought from my head and order a water to quench my thirst while I wait. I cross my legs, taking a small sip from the styrofoam cup as I hear the bell on the door chime.
I glance over, seeing Harry duck inside. I can't help but stare as he holds the door open for an older couple exiting.
He's wearing his usual black skinnies, tight as ever, paired with a black tee shirt, and his curly hair is pushed back by a scarf he's wrapped around his head.
No other man could pull off that look.
But Harry does more then just pull it off. He makes it seem effortless, but also incredibly s.exy.
D.amn him.
My cheeks flush as his eyes meet mine, a smirk gracing his face as I'm caught gaping at him. I take another drink of my water as he weaves in and out of the tables, making his way towards me.
The not so subtle glances women cast his way as he passes them seem to go unnoticed by him as he takes a seat next to me.
"If you've started without me, I'm going to be properly disappointed." He nods towards the cup in my hand.
"No worries, it's just water."
He grins, his dimple popping. "Living on the edge are we?"
"You could say that." I almost laugh at the irony.
"And doing so in a couture gown non the less." His eyes meet mine. "Very impressive."
"I don't think getting stood up is very impressive." I chuckle.
"Stood up?" His gaze drifts down my body then back up as he shakes his head. "How?"
I shift in my seat, taking a breath as my pulse quickens. "We should order."
"Yeah...Course" He nods. "What's your favorite?"
"Strawberry."
"Really? Have never had strawberry."
"Are you kidding?" I raise an eyebrow at him as he rests his elbows on the counter.
"Afraid not. First time for everything yeah?" He waves the waitress over, ordering us each a strawberry shake.
When we're left alone again Harry focuses back on me, green eyes searching mine. "What were you going to do tonight, before you got stood up?"
"There was a charity event in the Garment District we were going to."
"We?"
"Carter and I."
He nods, frowning thoughtfully. "Carter bailed on you? Why?"
"A important business meeting."
"With Kimura?"
I flinch at the name. "No. He's gone, he went back home, to Japan. Why?"
"Who is he?"
"A business partner of Carter's." I respond surprisingly calmly.
"Yeah?"
"Yes." I nod.
"Why're your hands shaking?"
I look down, not even realizing my hands were slightly trembling as they rested on the bar top.
"I.. it's probably cause I haven't eaten." I rub my palms together, hoping to ease the tension in them. "My blood sugar is probably low."
"Good thing we've a shake on the way then." Harry looks away from me, his brow furrowing.
We sit in silence as we wait, finally getting our drinks set in front of us after what feels like ages.
I take a few small sips, trying to think of something else to talk about. Anything else.
"Do you like it? The shake?" I ask.
"It's good." He takes a few drinks, not offering me more then that.
"So... how long have you and Nate been friends?"
Harry turns towards me, his eyes narrowed. "Few weeks after I moved here. Why'd you want to see me tonight?"
I gulp as he studies me carefully.
"Because I wanted to." I shrug.
"That's not a reason I don't think."
"Does everything need a reason?"
"Everything that matters, yes." He pauses. "What made you want to see me?"
"You don't make anything easy do you?" I chuckle, trying to lighten the mood. "Always so many questions and..."
"You want easy?" He cuts me off.
"Yes."
"Then go home with me."
"What?" I almost choke on my drink as Harry stares at me, completely serious.
"You want easy, then let's make this.." He motions between us, "..easy. Go home with me."
I shake my head, feeling my face turn red at his blunt proposal. "You know I can't do that."
"You can do whatever you want."
"I told you the night we met I wasn't going to sleep with you remember?"
"I do." He nods. "But neither of us really believed that."
"We didn't?" I sit up straighter as he turns his body towards mine.
His scent hitting me and making me thankful I'm sitting down as my knees go weak.
"Think there's something here we're both having a bit of trouble staying away from."
"And you think s.ex would solve that?"
"No." He chuckles, his green eyes boring into mine. "I'm fairly sure it wouldn't be a one time thing."
"You don't do more then one time things."
"And how would you know that?"
"I... word gets around." I lie.
"Well, like I said.. there's a first time for everything. You drive me mad Everly. Have no idea what's going through that mind of yours.. What're you thinking?"
I bite my lip, looking over his face. "I don't have the freedom to do whatever I want."
"Why?"
"Circumstance."
"In other words.. Carter." Harry frowns, pursing his lips in thought.
I don't answer as his hand moves towards me, pushing the hair off my shoulder and resting on my arm. His touch is hot but goosebumps rise on the surface of my skin as his thumb runs across it.
"If you could do whatever you wanted.." His eyes flick up, meeting mine. "What would you do? Right now?"
I look away from him, not being able to voice my thoughts. My eyes land on a stack of napkins and I pick one up along with the waitress' pencil she'd left lying on the counter.
I carefully write on it as Harry watches me intently..
Me | You
I show it to him and his eyebrows furrow in confusion as I flip the pencil over, very slowly erasing before I slide the finished product in front of him.
Me You
His eyes lock with mine as he chews the inside of his cheek. I know not many would understand the significance of what I'd written, but I'm certain Harry does.
He somehow seems to understand everything.
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