Julia's P.O.V.
Although I was following Ashton's lead I kept plenty of distance between the two of us. We still hadn't had a full conversation ever since what had happened the day before and right now I was still fuming about what happened, but we kept it civilized when we were with the rest of the guys. That's how it always was, in front of everyone else we were fine, but then when we were together someone would always say the wrong thing, specifically, he would say the absolute worst thing that came to his mind. He didn't have a filter when it came to me and that's usually why we ended up fighting.
"We really need to talk," he spoke as we stepped up the stairs
"We're talking right now," I commented as he rolled his eyes
"You know what I mean,"
"We're here to get the drinks aren't we? So let's just get them already," I urged him once we reached the top expecting him to walk towards the bar
"Alright fine, they're in this room," he finally complied opening one of the doors in the hallway to let me enter first
"What? No it's no-" before I could even finish, he gripped my arm pulling me into the room and slammed the door behind him keeping me locked in with him
"Ashton this isn't the time,"
"That's the thing, Julia, it never is the time with you. When you don't want to talk about something you completely ignore it as if it never even happened!" He exclaimed raising his voice
"Why the fuck are you yelling at me about it?! It's always you who makes me want to do that, you're always starting shit for confrontation!" I struck back
"I never intend to start shit, I'm just saying what's on my mind," he claimed making me roll my eyes
"And what? Calling me a hooker wasn't enough honesty for you? You think you can degrade me anymore than you already have?" I retorted watching him cringe at my words
"I didn't mean it when I said that," he spoke lowering his voice once he recognized the hurt look on my face
"Yeah, you were just saying what was on your mind," I mimicked his own words
"I'm sorry I said those things yesterday,"
"Sure you are," I scoffed
"We've been friends for ages now, you know when I'm lying," he reasoned
"Why did you say it then? I'm doing this whole thing for you and now you seem angry because of it, this is what you asked for,"
"I just- I don't know, I saw how the two of you were together, and I wasn't... I wasn't thinking," he stuttered as I watched him fiddle with his fingers in front of him hesitantly looking up to see my response
"You're paying me to be with him, obviously we're going to be together most of the time," I explained
"Are you enjoying it?" He blurted out
"What?"
"Are you happy with him?" He questioned weakly as I stared at him confused
"Ashton, we went over this. We're just friends, all we'll ever be is friends. I made that clear with him this morning." I told him
"Why would you need to make that clear with him?"
"Because..." I trailed off feeling uncomfortable at the topic of what happened before
"Did things happen?"
"You don't need to know everything, it wasn't anything bad, but we're just friends and he knows that," I said working my way around what happened
"So things did happen?" He immediately started assuming as I groaned at his further interrogation, he was supposed to be my friend, but now he's acting like he has some authority over me.
"Ashton just leave it,"
Ashton's P.O.V.
"Oh my fucking God," I groaned
She didn't see how bad it hurt me when I saw her with him. She never saw. Of course she didn't because I would never let her, but in the back of my mind I still had the slightest hope that she would notice.
"For once stop assuming things about me, Ashton! I can take care of myself with other boys, I know how to handle them and I know how to handle myself. You're always like this! You act like you're entitled to my actions, but you're not!" She basically yelled
"You don't get it!" I spat back in frustration
I wanted so desperately to tell her. I wanted to say that it killed me seeing her with him. That I couldn't handle the slightest possibility of them being together even though I would be the sole reason for that. I was giving them so many opportunities to be together and even though she told me that nothing has happened, that thought still played in my head over and fucking over again.
Before she could get another word in, we both silenced at the sound of a door opening on the opposite side of the room behind the drapes that kept light from coming in.
Josie's P.O.V.
Sitting out on the balcony, I watched as the guests began to pile into the backyard as Alex stepped onto the stage bringing up his lovely wife right next to him. One of their friends brought up a chair for Lisa as Alex began to speak
"Hey guys. We just wanted to thank everyone for being here to celebrate today with us," Alex started off receiving a cheer from the crowd
"And, I know it's not usual for a husband to give his wife a wedding present on the day of the wedding, but I wrote this song with the help of a really good friend, and I really wanted to share with you today, Lisa," he explained before being handed one of his guitars
I let out a small smile feeling a sense of relief at the happiness that everyone was radiating from below as Alex began strumming his guitar, but I seemed to recognize the chords he began playing. It wasn't until he began singing that I remembered.
"Smile for the cameras, Princess, all their eyes are on us. Even in a crowded room everything seems to freeze when I'm with you. Finally realizing that you're everything and all I'll ever need. Maybe one day you'll hear these words and say the same things to me."
It was the first line to the chorus that made the tears start to fall. That was it, that was the line that he'd always tell me whenever I needed him the most. We were always in the spotlight because of the contract, our most intimate moments being put out on total display, but he'd always be there to help me see the bright side in all of this. He was always there to show me why all of this was really worth it. But he's not anymore.
I was the one who helped write with Alex, and at this rate, I knew that I wouldn't be able to make it through the entire song knowing exactly what was coming up next. I was wiping the tears from my eyes as I walked into the room through the balcony but once I stepped in, I looked up to find two people staring at me.
"Oh- shit. Sorry, I didn't know there were people on here," I broke the silence immediately rubbing away the water in my eyes as I tried to break contact with the two of them. Even with closed eyes, I could tell that Ashton was staring down at me.
"Josie? Are you alright?" The girl I remember as Julia questioned
"Didn't know someone like you was even capable of crying," Ashton muttered making me look up at him as he glared at me with so much disdain
"Ashton," Julia snapped at him
"It's okay. I deserved that," I spoke
"Well that's great," Ashton rolled his eyes
I did deserve what he was telling me, but he was a little too overboard with the remarks. He has every right to hate me, but right now I'm tired of holding everything in.
"You know what? No. If you're going to hate me then fine, but at least hate me for the right reasons," I told him
"I don't want to hear your reasons," He exclaimed before turning to walk towards the door until Julia stopped him
"You're about to lose another friendship tonight if you don't stay here and listen to her, Ashton fucking Irwin." I heard her threaten him as he hesitated for a second before turning back
"I'll wait outside," she finished before closing the door behind her, leaving the two of us alone
"Nothing you say will make up for the hell you made Luke go through," Ashton retorted the second we were alone as I took in a deep breath to keep myself from crying again
You are not doing it again. You are not letting another tear fall because of this situation anymore. This is it. You're finally letting it go, you're letting everything out, you're telling the truth. I encouraged myself in my mind as I could feel his eyes dagger right through me
"I heard he was doing a lot better," I let out wanting to start off slow before I went straight into the truth. In all honesty, I just wanted another reason to talk about him. I've seen the interviews after things ended between us, I know I put him through a lot of fucking bullshit, but every day I'd get those occasional comments and messages from people telling me that he's moving on and that he's doing okay without me.
"No thanks to you," he grumbled
"How is he? How are all of you?" I asked
"As if you care," he scoffed. He really knew how to stand his ground when he was angry, but by now I was mad too.
"I do. I do fucking care-"
"Then why did you use us and then leave us like we were nothing?!" He yelled obviously agitated
"Because I had to!"
"Because of the contract? You promised him. You promised him that that damn paper wouldn't change anything."
"I know, and I never intended to break that promise."
"But you did." He stated indifferently as I was anxiously pacing back and forth in the room trying to find some sense in the next words coming out of my mouth
"Kate- she threatened to blackmail Luke if I didn't go along with the contract. And I couldn't do that. If he went down, all four of you would go down. This is your dream, I wasn't going to let anything fuck it up for you guys," I explained finding the calm in my voice as I started to finally release everything out in the air. It was the first time in a long time that I mustered up enough strength to say his name out loud, and it was the first time that I'd ever fully explained what had happened. As I continued my explanation, I could see him starting to soften, his arched brows lowered at the realization, he uncrossed his arms against his chest and placed them back in front of him. He was slowly beginning to understand what had truly happened, but he still kept his guard up.
"How do I know this isn't just another stunt?" He questioned
"Honestly, you don't. But I couldn't let you guys hate me for another lie, I just needed someone to hear the truth from me for once,"
"We- we never said we hated you," he said starting to let his facade fall at my words
"Well I know you're not my biggest fan either," I shrugged as he sighed
"You know how shitty this makes me feel? To know that for all these months, we thought you were a complete bitch for what you did but you did it for us," he said as I stared at him confused not knowing whether he was angry or not
"Come here," he spoke opening his arms for me
"You put us through hell," he said as I let out a tear filled laugh into his shoulder
"You think it was easy for me to let go of all four of you dumb asses?" I wiped my tears out of shear happiness. I was actually reconnecting with my past, just being able to talk to Ashton made me feel like it was possible to fix my mistakes, all of my mistakes.
"You have to tell Luke," he said almost immediately, grasping my shoulders in his large hands making me stare at him wide eyed at the mention of his name
"He hates me the most, I can't- I can't do that not right now," I shook my head
"He's been through a lot because of what happened,"
"I know- I know I hurt him," I admitted
"He deserves to know."
"And he will, just not now."