The news of the pregnancy came as a shock, as much of a shock as getting pregnant as a lesbian couple can ever be. We'd obviously been trying, months and months of trying in fact, but the fact that it had worked just as we'd decided to stop was a surprise for both of us and it took a few days to get our heads around it.
Isy was kept in the hospital overnight until they managed to stabilise her blood pressure and were confident that she wouldn't pass out again once we got home.
We were both really nervous about the possibility of another miscarriage, finding out that we were pregnant was supposed to be exciting, but in reality, it was terrifying and the journey home from the hospital was when Isy finally vocalised how she was feeling.
"I'm scared Ale" she spoke quietly from the passenger seat, her hands fidgeting in her lap.
"I can't loose another baby"
"I know. I'm scared too" I admitted, reaching across with my free hand and placing it on top of hers.
"I know that there is nothing that we can do to prevent it from happening again, but I just want to get into bed and stay there until the first trimester is over"
"If that's what you want to do then that's what we'll do"
"I can't just stay in bed for three months"
"Maybe not, but you can take it easy. You can rest, I'll pick up the slack with Jordi and I know that Mama will help as much as she can"
And Isy did rest. From the day we arrived back home until now, the day of our first scan, she took things easy. Due to it being the summer break I was around a lot more. I got up with Jordi in the mornings and took him to the park to wear him out while Isy rested, and Mama came over to help whenever I had to be out of the house for work.
The first scan was supposed to be an exciting milestone of pregnancy and with Jordi it was, but this time around we were both terrified. Terrified that we were going to go into that scan room and be told that there was no heartbeat or our baby wasn't growing properly. The car ride to the hospital was much like the journey home after finding about the pregnancy, nervous and tense.
I drove, while Isy sat in the passenger seat, cradling her tiny bump in one hand and holding mine tightly in the other.
"Everything is going to be ok isn't it?" She asked, looking for some kind of comfort which I so desperately wanted to give her, but the truth is that as much as I wanted to tell her everything was going to be fine I didn't know that.
"We've got to 12 weeks, you're already showing, everything's gone smoothly. It should be fine"
"We just need to hear their heartbeat and everything will be ok" she breathed, squeezing my hand tightly as she stared out of the window.
We'd only been sat in the waiting room for a minute or so when the nurse called Isy's name and we headed into the scan room. She waisted no time, climbing up onto the bed, lying back and lifting her shirt up to her ribs exposing her bump as quickly as she could.
"That was quick" the nurse remarked, as she sat down beside the bed noticing that Isy was already ready and waiting.
"We just want to hear that heartbeat" Isy explained quickly, reaching for my hand as I stood beside her and intertwining her fingers with mine.
I think the nurse could tell that we were nervous, the way Isy gripped my hand tightly, the quietness in the room and nervous glances between the two of us giving away that this was more than the usual first scan nerves.
"Let's have a look at this baby then shall we?" She smiled reassuringly, squirting the gel into Isy's stomach and pressing the wand against her skin.
The few moments that it took for the nurse to find the right position felt like a lifetime, the silence filled the room and the tension was palpable until the rhythmic thumping of our baby's heartbeat filled the small room.
It was like a huge weight had been lifted off both our shoulders, the worry and apprehension of the last few months disappeared as soon as we saw our baby on the screen and their heartbeat filled our ears.
"You've got a very wriggly little baby in there" The nurse laughed as she turned the screen around fully.
"They've got a lovely strong heartbeat and they seem to be growing perfectly. I just need to take a few measurements to be sure, but everything looks good"
I smiled and brought Isy's hand up to my lips, kissing the back of her palm over and over again as the scan continued.
Our baby has a heartbeat. Our baby is growing. Our baby is ok.
Isy held the scan pictures tightly in her hands for the whole journey home. We talked about how relieved we were, how cute the baby looked in the scan and how excited we were to show Jordi. The whole time Isy continued to stare at the pictures of our unborn baby, stroking her fingers across the the black and white images as I drove.
"Can we just sit here for a minute?" She asked once I'd pulled into the driveway of the house and turned off the engine.
"Of course we can"
"I feel like this is the first time we've actually been able to be excited about this pregnancy" she smiled across at me before looking back at the scans.
"I know, it's nice to think about actually meeting this little one" I placed my hand gently on her bump.
"Do you want a boy or a girl?"
"I have no preference, as long as they're healthy that's all that matters"
"We both know that you want a girl Ale. You did with Jordi and that hasn't just gone away..."
"I did want a girl, but that was just because I thought I'd have no idea what to do with a boy... but we've got Jordi now and I love our little boy so much. I really wouldn't mind another"
"Well, I'd like a girl this time"
"A little girl would be cute" I agreed.
"I'm not sure that I want to tell anyone else about our little secret yet, I know we said that we would after our scan if everything went well, but I like that it is just us who know about bump"
"Ok" I smiled, always knowing that it was Isy's lead to follow when it came to anything about the pregnancy. She was the one carrying so ultimately it was her choice.
"Can we tell Alba though? Mama knows, your parents know... I feel like it's only fair that she knows too. She's always been there for us and she's family" I asked, knowing how left out my sister would feel if she didn't know.
"You're right"
We'd planned for Alba to come around a few days after the scan, we'd talked about ways to tell her, but ultimately decided that it was best for Jordi to do the honours. We'd been practicing what he was going to say all day yesterday and he was ready to deliver his big line. His speech had really come along in the last few months and now was his time to shine.
Alba came around for dinner like she did every couple of weeks, she played with Jordi while we got the food ready, before we all sat at the dining table together, Isy and I in one side and Alba and Jordi on the other.
Now was Jordi's moment.
I gave him a thumbs up across the table while Alba and Isy were deep in conversation about their plans to meet up next week. He smiled a toothy grin at me before tapping on his aunties arm to get her attention.
"Auntie Alby- Auntie Albyyy" he continued to tap her arm until she turned to face him.
"Yes JJ?" She smiled down at her nephew.
"What is it?"
"I got a secret to tell you"
"Really?! What is it?" She leant closer to him.
"I love secrets"
Jordi stared across at Isy and I for a moment, looking for the go ahead, before leaning up to Alba's ear and whispering the news to her with a giggle.
"Mami has a baby in- in her tummy"
It look Alba a few moments to react to the secret that Jordi had just told her before she spun her head towards us with a shocked look plastered across her face.
"Is he telling the truth!?"
"I am!!!" Jordi shouted, the excitement getting to him as he bounced up and down in his seat.
"You're pregnant?!" She asked Isy.
"I am"
"I'm going to be an auntie again!!" She jumped up from her seat, rushing around the table to Isy and I, giving us each a hug before turning back to Jordi.
"You're going to be a big brother JJ!!"
"Mami has a baby in her tummy! Mami has a baby in her tummy!" He repeated his favourite line over and over again.