Chapter 37 – Morality Fail, Not Personality Disorder (Faith Ashlynn POV) pt.3
Genetics were surprisingly becoming the most interesting mind occupying topic when I wanted to just not think about everything and anything else. Especially when it came to the Conrads, before in the safe house of course I had read about genetics but to actually see how it worked within a family, the possibilities physically was astounding to me. Not even counting the children, just looking at Ansel, Scotty, Angela, Macy, Trevor and Danny... their features were all so similar to their parents. Sure, Ansel had darker hair than all the other men, but it was the eyes, and bone structure that set them apart in my eyes.
I had seen Danny in pictures, wedding photo's, two sets of them in the albums Kalenah kept in the family room. There was a first woman, with dark brown hair, light bluish eyes, and olive like skin tone, Lia – the youngest girl from her – was the most identical in features. But she the first wife wasn't what had caught my attention when I was looking through the albums.
I could see it, over the course of two albums.
The pictures told a story, the happiness in Danny's eyes – a younger version of him self of course – was bright, undeniable. His young face, crinkled at his eyes, near his lips, his eyes were filled with emotion I hadn't seen in any movie, or in real life at all. Sure I knew that it was love... but it's hard to see just how much love he held in those eyes. Picture after picture, until there is a wedding, and he's holding a sign in front of a house the bold words 'sold.'
Pictures change, family I now knew surrounding them, until the woman in the white dress that filled his eyes with the unknown depth of emotion, is rounded out, pregnant. The pictures shift, more smiles, until the woman is a rounded, a large belly between her and Danny – separating them, but still the love is in his eyes. I could remember that almost near the end of the first album, he's holding a baby, and there are tears in his eyes as he gazes down at a pinkish, near blush bundle he's holding, and again the love is there but I had never experienced what I saw.
Someone so happy, so in love that they were crying and ecstatic – all at once.
I could see in the album when for a bit of time that light went dim in Danny's eyes, but it then came back but it's not until after six pages of pictures, where the first one of Cynthia and his family, Andy as well is in the album. It takes a few turns of pages, but I can remember that eventually, that deep love in his eyes look comes back. Now, as I blink lethargically, my eyes on Danny, he appears to be that man that lost his first wife, standing in my hospital room, he enters the room, awkwardly shuffling from foot to foot, his eyes tired, and red.
Rolling my head to follow him, I had nothing to say.
"I took Cynthia to a hotel, I'm here alone," he mumbled, his forehead wrinkled in thought. "I don't care where you took her," I answered boldly watching his eyes.
He shook his head, "You care, and if you didn't you wouldn't have hit her."
"I don't know how you found my family and wormed your way in," he said, his voice harsh, low and rough, "That's – that's what I want to say to you... I want to blame you, because you showing up, you've turned my life upside down within minutes."
Was he serious? I turned his life upside down? Not the liar he married?
"I – I wanted to say those things to you, but now... I just... I need to kn-know – I need you to tell me the truth – I want to hear it from you," he struggled to speak. His voice shaking, "Because – because Cynthia is my light – she's – I never thought I would love anyone besides..." he doesn't finished, instead swallows thickly, wiping at his face roughly.
"Ansel and Kalenah said that she left you. So I'm asking, did she leave you behind?"
"Was I with her when you met her?" I countered.
Between Samson and minor drops between Ansel and Kalenah, I had come to know the story that she told everyone; I wasn't just lost and presumed dead according to Cynthia. She told them that I had died, no hope that I could be found alive.
"Were you separated from her?"
I blinked confused, "Why are you here? To question me?"
"Faith-" Trevor followed by Bess and Samson halted at the door, glancing between Danny and I, "what are you doing here? Hasn't Cynthia done enough?" Samson barked, pushing past Trevor and coming near me.
It's strange, the way he looks at me, it's familiar... but I just can't place the look in his eyes.
"Are you okay?" he glances at my arm, but it's short. Samson mostly focuses on my eyes, the intensity in his outdoes any look I've ever received. Nodding to him, his shoulders don't fully relax, but he gives me one hard nod before turning to Danny.
"What are you doing here?" Trevor asks the supplies he left my room for, in his hands, brother looking at brother, Danny still hoping from foot to foot, "I just came to speak to Sop – Faith," the slip turns my stomach, reminding me of the lies that Cynthia told.
"Well I think it's time you left," Bess said while Trevor stepped forward towards me, placing the supplies on a tray, rolling it to his right and pulling the chair to my side and starting to plaster my wrist. "I – Faith – I have no right asking you-"
"Then. Don't. Ask. Whatever. You're. Going. Too!" Samson snapped raising his voice, and sounding much louder than normal to me. Danny though, remained unaffected by the roar, gazing at me, "I'm going to ask this of Kalenah and my siblings, but I wanted to ask you as well," he continued, and with the drugs taking much more effect now, I blinked tiredly, waiting and not feeling quite safe with him in the room.
"The truth is – we had decided that Portland wasn't working out – and when Cynthia came here a few months back it was because she was checking out a new place for us – we're moving to Bend, bringing our bakery here – the one here – the owner is closing..." I sighed as the fog was thickening.
"The girls also got scholarships for the school you attend, I – it was a hard decision – picking up and moving here – had – had I known before I wouldn't-" his words making less sense to me. I couldn't actually make out where he was going with this. But I did notice Trevor's hands beginning to shake. He dropped the wrap, standing to look at Danny, while Bess place one hand on Samson's shoulder.
"Are you – you're joking? Right?" Trevor voice grew, the tone striking me oddly when I had yet to ever hear Trevor speak so unkindly to anyone – especially not when I was his patient. "Danny get out," Trevor said monotone, the silence following forced me to open my eyes again. Stiffly Danny left the office and I closed my eyes just as Bess turned sadly to Samson, a grimace on her face.
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Kalenah POV
"I'm sorry about your boys' fishing trip," murmured to Ansel, sipping my tea, waiting for Samson, my mother, and Trevor to return home with Faith. His eyes darting to mine in shock, "I – you know me better than that Lena, my children – and you – are my priority, the fish will be there next weekend," his voice rough, his eyes flashing with offense.
Sighing heavily, I nodded, knowing that in truth I wasn't thinking clearly, I could not believe Cynthia, but something else plagued me, a feeling inside that I couldn't shake.
"Did..." I hesitate, but with eyes luring me to share my burden, I set my tea down, "Did you find anything strange with Cynthia's behavior?"
"Or was it the therapist in you?" he refined my question.
Still he was right, "I mean... the way Cynthia answered those questions... then a minute later... her tune had changed, and everything was as though she was coming to her senses once again?" That part of the night playing heavily on my mind.
"Why – why she would say those things? Why not lie – why did she speak the truth and then backtrack into a false state?" I didn't want to think about what she said specifically, the callousness in her voice angering me.
"I still can't believe Faith actually hit her..." Ansel replied thoughtfully.
Shaking my head, "I agree but I – I guess – this is as bad as I expected," I lay my cards on the table. Faith wasn't the one to make a big scene, "had she not broken her wrist, I'm fairly certain the child would've ran off into the woods, that or up to her room-"
A low rumble deep inside Ansel interrupts me, as he drops his fist down on my table shaking the sturdy piece of furniture. "That guy – Dmitri – I don't know Lena, he had her locked away and with all the money he had, the least he could've done was give her vitamins or – or anything! I mean," he scoffs loudly, "Trevor and your mother said she broke her wrist in two place," he stresses angrily.
"Her bones are so weak.... yes, she wasn't starved or beaten for all the years she was with him, but he didn't make her stronger physically or mentally," it was a painful moan, "and now, on top of everything else... this happens?"
I don't reply, I can't. I do not have the answers to any of his questions. There was so much going on with Faith. We had seen her pulling away and I hadn't been too sure but I suspected it had to do with the family. Under the wrong impression that from the twins party weekend, something – someone – had said the wrong thing to her, but with her actions now, I guess I was wrong.
What else was simmering inside her just beneath the surface?
I boil another kettle of water for tea; and had time drink three cups before Samson, Bess, Trevor and Faith arrived home. The car coming up, eased my worried nerves, the unpleasantness in my stomach, but it once again dropped when I noticed that my mother and Trevor seemed more downcast as Samson lifted Faith and went straight inside with the apparently sleeping girl. Her wrist nestled between Samson and her – the light blue casted hand making me shake my head.
My mother trails after Samson, and just as I'm going to, I see the way Trevor looks at my Ansel, halting me in my place. "What?" my voice shaking as my fear spiked.
"Did you know that Danny and the family is moving to Bend?" his words aren't what I was expecting; I blink confused, before shaking my head.
"Apparently – he came to the hospital-"
"He did what?" Ansel spat between gritted teeth, "All of them are moving here?"
"Yes," Andy says from behind me, tiredly. I had almost forgotten he was here, having remained in the living room when all the other adults went off to their rooms. "I think – they are taking over the bakery – since Leslie is coming to school here, everything's packed up, we were all staying in a hotel back in Portland..." I closed my eyes in defeat.
One more thing that could impede Faith's progress.
She didn't much go out, but Bend also wasn't that big of a place, the chances of her running into Cynthia, and the children were fairly high. I glance over at Ansel, watching as his index finger twitches, "You can go with Trevor, Andy," he says heading to the entrance closet throwing a thick jacket on, though it's not like he needed it.
Lifting a brow in question at my husband, he just sighed, "I'm going to see Danny – he can't – he came to the hospital to badger Faith – I need to put an end to this before-" Ansel's eyes flicker over to Andy before he just shakes his head in silence. Understanding that he didn't want to speak in front of Andy, I nodded, getting my coat too, my eyes narrowed at Ansel just daring him to even think of objecting my company.
We leave the house following Trevor's car going a mile or two before seeing him drive onto his driveway, but we don't stop. Breathing heavily, the car ride to the hotel lodge is silent and filled with oncoming tension and animosity and halfway there we notice that a car seems to be trailing us as well. A flicker of the headlights in a signal I know belongs to Ansel's father.
"Trevor probably called him," he said by way of explanation.
Having Jonah along would probably help with whatever is said, a buffer between brothers, especially now when it was as though Faith was in the middle and Danny. He didn't know how important that dear child had come to mean to all of us. To me, it didn't matter that she wasn't biologically our child, she needed love and I – we, Ansel, I and the kids - we – had love to give. It didn't matter to me that he had known Cynthia for quite some time, not when in all that time she had lied endlessly to the point where I'm sure she believed the web she spun.
It was a tough place to be. I had been grateful when Cynthia arrived in Danny and the girls lives, but now – all I saw was the lie. I didn't see the love that pulled each girl from her shell, because that love made my stomach turn, thinking of Faith.
A saint in their story, but the one that caused deep unhealed – and some unknown – wounds in Faiths.
When we arrived, exiting the car, Jonah came to us as well, his hands deep in his pocket, "Thought I'd come along," he shrugged. Silently entering we head to the concierge desk, "Looking for Conrad?" Jonah spoke to the guy – Barry.
"We have two rooms rented out under that surname."
"D-Danny?" Ansel stammered.
"Room 210."
Standing back, Ansel knocked on the door, the three of us making no comment that Danny had rented out two rooms. But that alone had really chilled our ire.
Danny came to the door, his eyes red and face drawn like Trevor had described. Stepping aside, he waved us in, "come here to disown me privately?"
Ansel doesn't wait, "You went to the hospital after Faith," he said eerily calm, his voice much too even, especially when I knew my Ansel, he was boiling inside.
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So... let's go back to Dmitri... what do you guys think of him at this point? Was he the good guy or the bad guy?
And as for Danny... if you were in his position would you just forgive Cynthia? Move on with your life and pretend that she didn't lie to you about her daughter?