I know today was the volleyball tournament but I couldn't bring myself to go. I sent Belly a good luck text. I know she was with Jeremiah and Taylor, i know she was okay.
we were sitting on the Dock I was eating my strawberry ice cream my favourite
"are we gonna talk about it are we gonna pretend like it's not real"
"Can we pretend it's not real" I asked hopefully looking up from the ocean and into his eyes
"I think Its passed that point babe"
"I know" i answered, looking down at my hands then I realise I haven't even asked him what he wants, it's been all about what I want.
"What do you want" I asked looking at him.
"This isn't about Me. This is your choice"
"I know.... and thank you for understanding that but i want to know what you think. it does involve you, you know"I told him a small laugh at the end.
he took a breath, thought, for a minute "I think if you decided you wanted to get an abortion. if you thought that it was the best decision for you and we work through it and i would help you every step of the way"
"And if I want to keep it" I was anxious for his answer, scared of what he would say
this time he didn't really need much time to think about it "Then I would try and be the best dad I could be, and we move into a little apartment close to our college and I could take some time off if we needed to, maybe even take a gap year.
tears started coming out of my eyes
"No don't cry I didn't mean to make you cry" he says, wiping the tears from my face
I laughed, smiling "not sad tears con" god i hate pregnancy hormones
"I love you more than anything and I would love our baby more than anything if it's now or if it's in 10 years" he grabbed my hand and held it tightly
"so you'd be okay.... if I decided to keep it"
"Of course I would, It might be hard at first I'm not saying I'm gonna be perfect but I'll try as hard as I can"
"So is it ok"
"is what ok"
I took a big breath, and then looked at him "If we kept it" he smiled "more than okay"