*• May 2013 •*
- Los Angeles, USA -
~< Happily >~
IT WAS MOMENTS LIKE THESE THAT GAVE ADDIE ANXIETY ATTACKS.
Addie couldn't explain the small rush of pleasure of the way her shirt tucked into cargo pants with a nice belt looked. How her waist looked slim but still... not so feminine.
Leaning against the door of the closet and staring in the mirror, Addie began to realize how much she enjoyed when she could hide her curves, when something about her took on sharper, darker features.
Addie wasn't sure what this feeling meant. And the more she thought about it, the less she could breathe, and the tighter her ribs became around her lungs.
The alarm ringing on her phone snapped Addie out of her trance. She'd spent the last hour changing outfits and fooling around with her makeup and hair. Until she got this look.
Addie turned the alarm off, knowing it meant it was time to head out to pick Harry up from the airport. She headed out the door, car keys, phone and wallet clutched in her hand with her sunglasses and coffee cup in the other.
Addie should've probably grabbed a bag, but it would've diminished the outfit. Plus, she was a bit of a masochist, and had learned how to carry an insane amount of things at the same time.
The airport was stuffed with people, and Addie knew there was a high likelihood of getting caught out with Harry, when so many witnesses were around, but at the moment, all Addie could care about was seeing her boyfriend again.
Harry had sent Addie a selfie right before takeoff, where he had on a black beanie and a gray hoodie. She'd chided him, saying his curls would be all smooshed. He replied by saying she could just run her fingers through his hair and un-smoosh his hair. Addie, the teenage love puddle that she was, secretly blushed, and was grateful he wasn't there to tease her about her pink-dusted cheeks and then refused to reply to his message.
Addie scanned the crowd for her boy, her smooshed hair, black beanie, gray hoodie, vainilla-smelling boy.
Funnily enough, the first thing Addie recognized was the dark brown suitcase Harry was lugging around. And once she did, despite all logic and reasonable thinking telling her that she should try and be as discreet as possible, Addie ran into the crowd, searching for the green-eyed boy.
Spotting her amongst the crowd, Harry quickened his pace and when she jogged towards him, he threw open his arms just in time to catch her as she wrapped her arms around his neck.
Addie bathed in this new luxury of his arms, of his warmth and his presence. This was Harry, soft brown curls, lively green eyes, all comfort and home.
Taking a deep breath, Addie smiled as she was hit with the realization that she was finally with Harry again. She missed him the way the sun might misses the moon, constantly awaiting another eclipse so that they may be able to reunite.
Harry shifted his body, giving her a one-sided hug, refusing to let go of her as his arm remained over her shoulder. They walked towards Addie's car, while he talked about his flight.
Something was off.
Addie tried to place what had changed, why something felt different. But everything seemed the same.
Harry was still had his kind, soulful energy. He hadn't cut his hair. He talked the same. He dressed the same.
It proved to become bothersome, the knowledge that something was ajar, but not being able to quite put her finger on it. Like a word on the tip of your tongue, just out of reach.
Addie tried to focus on the conversation. She really did. She listened intently, asked him questions and kept an easy smile on her face.
"You changed your fucking cologne!" Addie snapped, slamming her hand down. Harry jumped at the sudden outburst, halfway through an anecdote about a couple who were talking loudly.
Harry frowned, eyes hidden by his sunglasses as he braked at the red light as they were surrounded by cars and turned to face her. "What?"
"You little shit, I've spent the last twenty minutes trying to figure out what had changed and- you changed your cologne!" Addie pointed accusatorially at him.
An easy, light laughter slipped from Harry's lips, a slight bewilderment to his words as he said, "So that's why you've been so distracted?"
"Yeah." Addie crossed her arms, leaning back into her seat. Her eyebrows knitted together as she held her pride. Harry's lips twisted into an amused and endearing smile. He pressed a soft kiss to her lips, and then leaned back into his seat just in time for the light to turn green.
The cologne smelled darker than Harry usually wore, permeated with hints of wood and an almost smoky smell.
"I like it."
Harry glanced over at Addie. "Hm?"
"I like the new cologne," Addie clarified, a small smile on her lips as she breathed in the unfamiliar scent. It would soon become a favorite of hers, she was sure.
Harry smiled, an uneasiness to it, almost nervous as he asked, "Really? I thought it might smell too... dark."
Shaking her head, she reassured him, "I like it. It smells nice."
"Thanks," Harry bit his lip, trying to stifle the grin threatening to break through his steady face. His cheeks were dusted in pink as he bathed in the luxury of her compliments.
Addie hummed along to the song on the radio, a song from Paramore's new album.
There was music blasting from the speakers of the car, and then they rolled the windows down, letting the late morning air muss their hair, the sun warming their spirit.
Harry's fingers drummed a steady beat against the wheel.
It was a perfect moment.
"We don't have a song," Harry mentioned, quirking an eyebrow as he glanced at his girl from under his sunglasses.
Addie's eyebrows knitted together as she pondered over this thought. "How on earth do we not have a song? We've been together almost three months."
"Dunno," Harry shrugged, a little smile dancing on his lips. "Is there any important song that's ours?"
"I mean... we have Alive, but I don't really think it counts if we wrote it ourselves," Addie chuckled, brushing a hand through her hair, trying to bring a little order to the mess. "And it's not the most romantic of songs."
"I think a song about being addicted to sex isn't the best song," Harry barked with laughter. "Uh... what song did we perform together the first time? When we met?"
"You Belong With Me?" Addie answered, and Harry nodded eagerly, happy with the choice. "Oh no. No way."
Harry groaned, frustrated. "Why not?"
"Because I wrote that about my first crush, no way are we relating it to us!"
"It's no big deal-"
"I told him I liked him, so he ghosted me and then after a month, told me it was best we weren't friends because his new girlfriend didn't like us hanging out."
Harry's jaw dropped. "Oh shit."
Addie began cracking her knuckles, going one by one until she heard the pop. "Yeah. We are not relating it to us."
"What about our first dance?"
Addie scoffed. "Our first dance was in a hotel room while we were drunk as fuck and it was to 'All for You' by Janet Jackson. Not romantic at fucking all."
"Then you make a suggestion!" Harry threw one of his hands up defensively.
"What about I Wanna Be Yours?"
"How is that relevant to us at all?"
Addie gaped at Harry, shocked he didn't remember. "You- the first night we ever hung out, the six of us outside of work, Niall and I got our guitars out, and you made me play I Wanna Be Yours," Addie explained, using her hands to punctuate her words. "It was the first moment I realized the two of us were truly compatible because we had the same tase in music."
Harry frowned, perplexed as he remained deep in thought. "Why don't I remember that?"
"Because men are idiots."
"True."
Addie groaned, throwing her head back in frustration. "Okay, so what is our song going to be?"
Harry shrugged. "Maybe we'll just be one of those couples who never has a song."
She scoffed, slamming her hand down. "No. Fucking no. Couples who don't have a song are lame-ass couples."
"Fine." Harry turned the radio on and glanced over at her, locking her gaze in his. "Whatever song is on the radio will be our song. It's that or nothing."
Addie narrowed her eyes at him, amber eyes turning into slits. "Fine."
Harry turned the volume up, and the steady sound of drums and a smooth, melodic voice resonated through the speakers.
I think I'm falling. I think I'm falling for you.
"The 1975," Addie said, letting the music wash over her.
Harry frowned. "I haven't heard this song."
The beat drop came just in time, and Addie's eyes fluttered close as she leaned back in her seat, softly singing along to the song, "And on this night, and in this light, I think I'm falling for you." She smiled to herself, glancing over at Harry and shrugging with one shoulder. "Fallingforyou. It's a damn good song."
Harry pulled into the driveway of Addie's car as the second verse began, clicking the brake into place and sliding his seat back. They laid their seats down until they were almost lying down on their sides, face to face.
"I don't wanna be your friend, I wanna kiss your neck," Addie sang, a quiet song for the two. A whisper that lingered in the air like smoke, wrapping around them and lingering on their clothes and their bones. Her lips grazed against the smooth skin of his collarbone, like the feather of a bird fluttering to the ground. "Don't you see me? I, I think I'm falling for you."
Harry's eyes fluttered close, bathing in the bright red hues of the moment. Passion laid on his skin as plainly as pink lipgloss shining and glimmering. An invisible tattoo pressed into his body, to haunt his memories forever.
When Addie's lips began trailing a path up, from his collarbones up his neck, leaving faint red marks that would turn blue and gray until they faded into yellow. Her teeth nipped at his skin, and the coolness of her tongue soothed the angry marks left.
Electricity idled in the spots where his fingers precariously touched her waist, digging his blunt nails in whenever her lips touched a particularly sensitive point.
Their love didn't fade, not when they could sit in this moment for seemingly forever, two hearts intertwined in a precarious illusion of forever.
A fire began deep in their bones, spreading as they grew more desperate for closeness and intimacy.
Ivy spread around their fingers until their hands were inseparable, and they stuck to each other like spilled wine to a dress.
When they got out of the car, it was with hesitation that they parted for a few moments as they went inside Addie's house, leaving Harry's luggage forgotten in the trunk.
Instead, when the door shut behind them, it was Harry pressing against Addie, pushing her against a wall and pressing his lips to hers as if he were suffocating and she was one last breath of air.
And Addie let him take her breath away, let him take all of her away, it was all his anyways. Her heart, her soul, her everything was his to take. But he took with care and with hesitation, ever kind in every little thing he did.
When a hand slipped down her thigh, pushing her underwear down, it was with no doubt in Addie's mind that she helped him, gasping as she reveled in new and electric sensations.
"Is this okay?" Harry whispered, kissing a mark onto her collarbone. It wouldn't fade for days, that was for sure. But it was okay. She wanted everyone to know she had someone at home, someone to love her and care for her.
Addie inhaled deeply as his fingers maintained a steady rhythm, and she nodded, mumbling incoherently, "Fuck yes, yes yes."
"You're beautiful," Harry whispered, giving her a soft kiss, and grazing his teeth against the bottom of her lip as he pulled away. "You're perfect. So fucking beautiful." He swallowed her moans as he kissed her again, letting his tongue explore her mouth. "Can't believe you're mine."
"All yours. 'M all yours."
***
"Ten Things I Hate About You will forever remain the superior rom-com!" Addie argued, slapping her hand against her thigh, and then immediately regretting it when she winced at the burning sensation. Harry snickered, rubbing the bright red hand mark on her thigh.
He whispered in her ear, "Pretty sure I'm the only one supposed to leave marks, love."
Addie closed her eyes. She counted to ten, begging God to give her strength to keep a steady face when Harry whispered the most lust-provoking things in her ear.
Addie was an atheist.
But she figured only God could save her from her sins now.
Harry shrugged. "When Harry met Sally is the best rom-com. Argue with the wall."
"Eh," Addie shrugged. Harry gasped in offense, placing a hand over his chest. "I watched it a couple of years ago. Mediocre, to be honest."
"That's it. We're over," Harry exclaimed, dropping his hand from her thigh and crawling from the bed. He grabbed his Eagles shirt and pulled it over his body, making Addie pout as he hid the butterfly from sight. "You did not just call When Harry Met Sally a mediocre movie."
Addie shrugged. "It didn't impress me."
Harry shook his head, pointing his fingers at her and shaking it. "You uneducated swine. I can't believe I kissed you."
Addie simply watched as Harry went through the five stages of grief from a few simple words. "Look, how about I try to watch it again and we see what I think at the end?"
Harry narrowed his green eyes into slits, a doubtful expression on his face. "You get one chance. And that's it."
Addie smiled as Harry crawled back onto bed. He grabbed the remote and began looking for the movie on Netflix.
He was frowning deeply as he did, clearly being dramatic. She kissed the corner of his lips. He couldn't keep the smile off his lips, though he fought it with all his strength.
"You look cute when you're grumpy," Addie told him, pulling him to lie down next to her, tucked under her arm.
He frowned once again. "I'm not cute. I'm intimidating."
Addie nodded patronizingly. "Very intimidating. Not at all like a cute puppy."
Harry pouted. Addie kissed him. He smiled despite himself.
Addie tugged at the hem of his shirt. She whined, only slightly desperate, "Take the shirt off."
Harry rolled his eyes. "You just like me for my tattoos, don't you?"
"I do. Now take the damn shirt off, Styles."
"As you wish, m'lady."
Harry took his shirt off, throwing it as if it were a basketball to the other corner of the room, where it landed right on the desk chair.
Addie pulled him towards her, letting him rest his head on her chest, where he traced patterns on the exposed skin of her belly. She was wearing nothing but a pair of shorts that barely covered her, and a bra.
Meanwhile, Harry was wearing nothing but boxers.
If any responsible adult walked into the room, they were sure to have a heart attack at the sight of the two half-naked teens. To be fair, they hadn't had sex. Yet.
And also, there was no responsible adult in Addie's life. So...
"Did you know you're technically a pedophile?"
"Real nice way to keep the romance alive."
"You're an adult who just fingered a minor."
He began to protest, "That's not-" Addie cut him off with a look, and Harry's jaw dropped. "Shit. I'm technically a pedophile."
Addie snorted with laughter. "It won't hold up in court, but legally- technically, I mean..." She clicked her tongue, spreading her arms in a 'what-can-you-do?' manner.
In his flustered state, Harry whined, hiding his face in the crook of Addie's neck.
She smiled, inviting the warmth of his skin as she trailed her hands up and down his back. Addie was always cold. Harry was always warm. They fit.
While Harry recovered from this new revelation, Addie observed the ink underneath his skin, some a little more faded than others, but still ever present. Something about the way it looked fascinated Addie, just about the texture and the way the ink lay under layers of skin.
It was without a second thought that she began to trace the shape of the images tattooed on Harry's arm with a single light blue nail. He glanced up, watching as she traced the silhouette, entranced by it.
"I love your tattoos," Addie muttered, eyes focused on tracing the shape of the birdcage. She'd always had in her mind that she needed to write a line about a cage.
Gold cage, hostage to my feelings.
Addie mentally filed the line away for later use. "I have news."
Harry hummed, eyes closed as he rested most of his weight against her. The pressure was somehow relieving. "Yeah?"
"I went to an audition the other day."
"Audition?"
"For a musical. Heathers," Addie said, rushing to get the words out now that the stain had been made and the wine had been spilled. "It's this local theater downtown, and I went for the role of Veronica, and they sent me a message earlier and I got the role. And I'm scared shitless."
"Addie, that's wonderful!" Harry exclaimed, sitting up with a sleepy haze surrounding his excitement for her victories. He was cheering her on for her successes. "Why are you scared? You're going to be fantastic, I know it."
"Because..." Addie then began her long rant. It was six months that she would have to dedicate completely to the play, where she would have to be in LA constantly for rehearsals and to learn the songs and the choreography and the acting- The acting! Addie had zero experience in theatre and even less in acting, so how was she supposed to have the main character for her first time acting? And she wasn't a dancer either, she was going to end up forgetting her choreography or messing a step up. And she was on tour currently, how was she supposed to do both at the same time? And she hadn't told modest, so they would be pissed that she'd kept this a secret, and would they even let her do it? It was such a huge commitment when she should be on tour and working on her album, and was she ready for it? What if she didn't like her castmates and what if they hated her and what if people found out who she really was, and what if they already knew and that's why they hired her? She wasn't going to be good enough. She was going to fail. She wasn't good enough. She wasn't enough.
Harry watched with parted lips and wide eyes. When she stopped to take a deep breath, he caught her hands by the wrists and made her look at him.
"Addie- Ads, Love- Look at me." It was his stern voice that snapped Addie out of her overwhelming thoughts. He locked gaze with her, honesty reflecting on his face like a mirror, "You're going to be okay. You're a great singer, you've learned choreographies before, and you know damn well you can act. And if you can't act, well then, you're Adelaide fricking Heathers and you will figure it out." Harry grabbed her face, cupping it in his hands. "You'll figure out the schedule and you'll like the people there, and if you don't- well, several years of red carpets and awards shows and events have prepared you to be around obnoxious people,
"But most importantly, you want this. This is for you so stop worrying what everyone else thinks," Harry said.
Addie had always been good at reading people, at knowing when they lied or manipulated her. She knew when to call bullshit and when to trust.
But that internal radar always seemed to malfunction around Harry.
Because there was not a single cell in his body that wasn't vulnerable, that wasn't honest and genuine. Every inch of kindness, every dose of care and love, were all real.
A bullshit meter doesn't work when there's no bullshit to detect.
Harry pressed his forehead against hers. "And if you ever struggle, just remember, it's you and me..."
"That's my whole world," Addie finished, the nerves inside of her assuaged if only for a few moments.
***
The sand under their feet was cold, a stark contrast to the blistering heat that had wilted the air mere hours earlier.
Harry grabbed Addie's hand, holding in the other a large towel. They walked until they were a few feet away from that spot where the waves met the sand. Where you could see the wet sand separated from the dry.
Harry laid down the towel and they both sat down, after she whispered a joke about crabs pinching them in the ass. He'd barked with laughter and answered with a snarky comment about her lack of romance.
The drive down to this distant part of the beach, isolated from the rest of the city, had been a little bit long, but filled with the two of them sipping slushees from 7/11 and singing to the songs on the radios at the top of their lungs.
Addie could only imagine how they must've looked to passerby's, two teens sipping their cherry red liquid, practically screaming to Party in the USA as they drove with the windows down.
But it was freedom. And it was young love. It was everything it was supposed to be.
And as they rested their heads against each other, hands tightly intertwined, gazing at the reflection of the moon on the crystalline water, it was a different kind of love.
Not the loud, vibrant teenage love from before, but something quieter and more peaceful, with hues of gold and silver entwined.
This kind of love was more hidden, the faint ghosts of what could be something beautiful, something that could last and be passed on like ancient relics across history. A love to be portrayed as historic and remembered in everyone's memories.
It was a delicate, golden love.
But it wasn't one that would last forever. It was a faint smoke that would linger, a ghost that would haunt until the time was right for the love to form.
"Harry."
"Yeah?"
Addie looked up at the stars. She picked one, the brightest of them all, and she named it Harry. After her shining star.
So years could pass and no matter what, when she found that bright, bright star, she would always remember it as Harry. The green-eyed curly-haired perfect angelic boy who held her hand and calmed her anxiety. The boy who cared for her at her lowest and cheered for her at her highest.
"I love you," Addie whispered, a promise for the moon and for the two. It was a ceremony of marriage in the faith it held in forever, with only the three to remember.
Harry looked over at her, happiness swarming his every feature, radiating and shining brighter than the moon itself. Her bright, bright star.
He looked at her like she held the key to his heart in his hands. Because she did.
Harry smiled, eyes filled with all the words he would never quite form, the emotion he could never get across. But he tried to put it all into three simple words:
"I love you."
a/n: hi there. i'm a day late, but here it is. i might take a small hiatus for a couple of weeks before beginning part 4. we have one last chapter left and then part 3 will officially be done.
this chapter is really just the two of them being in love, and i'm really proud of it. i hope y'all enjoy it as much as i do.
remember to vote and comment because i crave validation. love ya <3