It's hard to believe that three months have already passed since I discovered my siblings' true identities as reincarnators like me.
Aqua decided to teach me Japanese, and he has been an amazing teacher, devoting his time to teaching me Japanese. I'm extremely grateful to him for his efforts, and although I'm still not proficient, I've made significant progress.
During our lessons, I learned some new information that took me by surprise. First, it's already 2016, which means three years have passed since I died in my past life. It's shocking how quickly time flies, and it's a surreal feeling to think about how much the world has changed since I was last alive.
But the best discovery for me was learning my mother's name. It's Ai. When I found out, I couldn't help but feel thankful, since it was awkward not knowing her name even after we spent months together.
I also noticed that Ai is a part of my name, Aikara. When I asked Aqua about the meaning of our names, he told me that Ai means love, and Aikara means "from love." I find it incredibly sweet that my mother named me after such a beautiful sentiment.
Also, It surprised me to learn that Ai is an idol. I know how cruel the entertainment industry is, and I'm sure she would be forced to retire if her fans know the fact she has kids, so it must mean that she is keeping our existence a secret from them.
On another note, lately, I've found myself warming up to her and seeing her as a mother figure. I do feel guilty about my previous mother, but I can't help what my heart desires. All I want is the love and warmth of a family.
However, even with my new family surrounding me, fear still grips my heart.
Even with the family I had in the past, I'm still greedy for love. And I'm still afraid that if I reveal my true self, they'll reject me and stop loving me. So, even though I've been reincarnated, I still put up a facade to protect myself.
It's not like I minded putting on a facade again; after all, I've been doing it for years. With time comes a sense of familiarity, and I've become so adept at wearing this twisted mask that I'll never be able to distinguish my true self from this persona.
Sometimes, I contemplate embarking on a journey to find my true self, but deep down, I know it's a fruitless pursuit. This facade has become so ingrained in my being that I know I'll never find it.
And even though I spoke about people accepting my true self in my final moments, those were just fleeting thoughts. I wasn't planning to follow through on them; they were just a "what-if" scenario.
But surprisingly, I don't feel sad about not knowing my true self. I willingly don this mask knowing that this may be my fate one day. And in a way, it's liberating to know that I can be whoever I want to be, even if it's not the real me
As I sat there, contemplating my existence, just as always when I get lost in my thoughts, I suddenly heard the sound of crying.
"WAAA! WAAAHHHH!" It was piercing, and I knew exactly who it was - Ruby. Despite being a reincarnator like the rest of us, she continued to act like a helpless infant just to get the attention of Ai.
Unlike Aqua, who doesn't like the fact she acts to get Mom's attention, I don't mind it at all. In fact, if I were to dislike it, I would be a massive hypocrite since I act all the time. So as usual, I tuned out the noise and retreated back into my thoughts, pondering the big questions of who I am.
I always did this even as a child. I know it's a strange habit, but it brought me a sense of comfort to delve deep into my own psyche, even if I never found the answers I was looking for. Perhaps it was the act of introspection itself that I found comforting, or maybe it was the possibility of discovering something new about myself that kept me coming back to these thoughts. Either way, I welcomed the opportunity to explore my own thoughts and emotions in this quiet moment.
Unfortunately, my thoughts were interrupted yet again as I felt my body leave the floor. Looking up, I saw Mom's smiling face. "I can't just leave you now, can I, Aqua?" she said, getting our names wrong as usual.
I glanced over at Ruby and Aqua, who were also in her arms, and couldn't help but feel a little worried. Would Mom be able to carry all three of us at once? Just as I was about to cause a fuss to be let down, an unfamiliar voice spoke up.
"That one's Aikara. It should be pretty obvious, given his purple hair. Are you sure you're not pretending?" I turned to see who was speaking and was surprised to find a middle-aged man with blonde hair, shades, a neatly trimmed mustache, and a short beard. Beside him was a beautiful young woman who appeared to be in her early twenties. I noticed matching rings on their fingers and assumed they were married.
As soon as I realized the age difference between him and the young woman, I instantly felt my favorability toward him drop.
I couldn't resist the urge to stick my tongue out in disgust at the guy, hoping it would at least make him back off. Surprisingly, it worked and he took a step back, looking somewhat confused.
"What the hell, I was just trying to defend you, kid," he muttered, clearly taken aback by my gesture.
That's when Ai piped up, her laughter ringing out through the room. "Oh, don't mind him. He's just upset because he knows how young your wife is and he's creeped out by you President Satou."
Wait, president? I glanced over at the man Ai had referred to as Satou, who apparently held some sort of important position. Despite his title, I refused to call him "president" due to my own personal bias. It seemed like he had regained his composure, though, and was now giving Ai a steely glare.
"It's Saitou, you shitty idol," he corrected, his tone biting.
Despite the tension in the room, I couldn't help but laugh at the fact that Ai had gotten his name wrong. She seemed to take my laughter as a sign of approval and grinned at me brightly, her eyes sparkling with mischief.
"Awww, your laugh is so cute, Ruby," she said, pinching my cheeks with her free hand. As soon as the words left her mouth, I realized that I had let my habit slip again. It was like second nature to me now, slipping into character without even realizing it.
I found it funny for sure, but it wasn't to the point I will laugh. My years of honing my acting skills had made it almost second nature to become my persona. Because of that, I tend to act as I think my persona would. I usually do this unconsciously because I became so used to it.
"You got his name wrong again. Are you sure you're their mother?" Satou asked, shaking his head in disbelief. His previous glare was gone, replaced with an astonished expression as Ai continued to mess up our names.
Ai put on an innocent expression, trying to deflect Satou's criticism. "I can't help it you know? I'm bad at remembering people's names and faces. Isn't it awful, babies? Japanese men like to stereotype mothers."
Satou shot back, his frustration mounting. "You don't even have a passport! Don't say something so global. Besides, you don't even accept overseas shoots!"
Ai's smile didn't falter. "But President Satou, I can memorize people's names when I think they have talent." She paused, butchering his name once again. "See? I remembered yours!"
Satou shot her another withering look. "I literally just told you my name a few seconds ago, how the hell did you forget it so quickly, you shitty idol?"
"Oh, right. Sorry about that, tee-hee," Ai giggled, her eyes crinkling in amusement.
Satou let out a resigned sigh and adjusted his glasses. "Anyway, as of today, the idol 'Ai' is making her comeback. Let's discuss what we're going to do from now on." He launched into a discussion about Ai's upcoming idol activities, and I listened intently, curious about the life of an idol. "Your first appearance will be on tonight's singing show. It'll be live, but you can handle it, right?"
Ai nodded her head, a confident smile spreading across her face. "Of course."
"Good," Satou said, a hint of relief in his voice. "While Ai's at work, I'll have my wife take care of the kids." He turned to his wife, who sighed in response.
I couldn't help but notice her demeanor, and I could tell that she wasn't thrilled about taking care of the babies. As someone who had also taken care of babies before at the orphanage, I totally understood her. I know how difficult and annoying the could be.
But don't worry Ms. Wife! The Reincarnated Babies will save your day and lessen your suffering.
Suddenly, Ai spoke up, surprising us all. "Can't I bring my kids to work?" she asked, her voice innocent.
Satou's face twisted in anger, and he raised his voice. "Of course you can't!" he shouted. "Drill it into your head! You're a sixteen-year-old idol with three kids! If the world finds out, your career is over. They'll question my responsibility as your director, and that will be the end for our company." He made a slicing motion across his throat. "We'll all be going to hell."
He continued, his tone lowering to a more serious note. "You also can't go shopping with your kids or handle any documents, especially with Aikara. I can tolerate the twins to some extent since they have blonde hair even with your looks, but Aikara is practically a male version of you."
I couldn't help but wonder if I really looked like my mom that much.
"In case of an emergency, we will take care of them," Satou reassured Ai as he pointed to himself, trying to be serious.
Ai, on the other hand, seemed uninterested and muttered, "Eh? That's such a pain," as she looked down at Aqua. "Right, Aikara?" she added, getting his name wrong once again.
"Actually, that's Aqua," Satou corrected her, sighing inwardly. He knew that he was fighting a losing battle.
Ai giggled, unfazed by her mistake.
To be honest, despite Ai's tendency to mix up our names and make small mistakes, I don't think she's a bad mother. Her determination to be a good parent is evident, and I admire her for choosing to keep us even though it would have been easier to have an abortion for the sake of her career as an idol.
Satou turned to us, breaking my thoughts. "We don't have much time until rehearsal. Let's get going."
"Okay," Ai replied as she stood up. As she did, one of her sleeves slipped and she nearly exposed herself. My heart skipped a beat, but Aqua was quick to catch the fabric and prevent any further embarrassment.
"Oh, whoopsies! I almost showed my boobs to the president. Haha!" Ai said with a laugh, seemingly unaware of how close she had come to revealing herself to a middle-aged man.
"Thanks, Ruby!" Ai exclaimed, her energy unfazed despite the close call.
"It's actually Aqua," Satou corrected her with a sigh, wondering when she would finally get their names right.
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Authors Notes
End of Chapter 4, I was planning to write until the scene where he watches B-Komachi for the first time, but I was surprised to find out I reached 2000 words already. When did that happen?
Anyways, looks like his mind, Aikara still calls Saitou Satou.
I have nothing much else to say, look forward to the next chapter I guess?
Oh yeah, if you see some mistakes, comment, because I usually don't read the finished product before posting.
That's all, Adios.