Awake and Alive - Skillet
"Bellamy?"
The word was more like two muffled syllables, but Bellamy just knew Clarke was trying to say his name. She was calling out for him. Her eyes remained closed, but her hand slowly lifted to her face. Bellamy watched as Clarke's eyes fluttered, fighting to open.
"You're okay, Clarke. I'm here." Bellamy said, grabbing her hand. But Clarke pulled away.
Her eyes were now open, wide and full of panic. Clarke reached up to the tube in her mouth, hands frantically trying to remove the breathing apparatus. Bellamy grabbed her hands, pulling them away and leant over her.
"Clarke! Princess, look at me!" Bellamy said, loud enough to grab her attention. Clarke's eyes flicked up to him, and her breathing calmed. "You're okay, Princess. You need to keep the tube in. Just relax."
Clarke breathed a sigh of relief and nodded her head. Bellamy ran a tender hand over her head, stroking her hair. He pressed a kiss to her forehead.
"I'll go get the doctor." Octavia said, hurrying out the room.
Bellamy nodded, but he couldn't take his eyes off Clarke. He pressed another kiss to her forehead. Clarke leant into his touch, closing her eyes.
"Don't ever scare me like that again." Bellamy whispered.
Clarke looked up at him and ran a hand down his cheek. Her eyes began to fill with tears.
"Hey, don't cry. It's all gonna be fine, Princess." Bellamy smiled softly.
Clarke nodded her head. Suddenly, the door opened, and a team of doctors and nurses rushed in. Bellamy took a step back, allowing the staff to get to Clarke.
"Good to see you awake, Miss Griffin." One of the doctors smiled. Clarke could only nod her head.
"Alright, Clarke, we're going to take the tube out now. This might be uncomfortable." A nurse said.
Again, Clarke nodded her head. Bellamy watched silently as two nurses placed themselves either side of Clarke. The nurse on her left pulled out a stethoscope, while the nurse on the right tried to carefully move Clarke forward. Clarke's face scrunched in pain, and Bellamy fought against every instinct to run to her. The doctor stepped up to the bed and slowly began to remove the oxygen tube while the nurse ran the stethoscope across her back.
Seeing Clarke in such discomfort was heartbreaking for Bellamy, but even he sighed in relief when Clarke was finally free of the tube and handed a cup of water. Clarke took a long drink before she handed the cup back to the nurse.
"Thank you." Clarke croaked.
The two nurses left the room while the doctor flipped pages on his clipboard. He clicked his pen before writing something down.
"Good stuff. Now, you're a very lucky lady, Clarke. The bullet landed in some soft fat around your stomach, an inch in either direction and we may not be sitting here having this conversation." The doctor said.
Clarke nodded her head in understanding.
"You'll be here for a few more days for recovery, but I'm going to strongly suggest plenty of bedrest when you get home." The doctor smiled.
"Don't worry, Doc, she'll be well taken care of." Bellamy said, moving to Clarke's side again. He gripped her hand, smiling down at her.
"Good." The doctor nodded. "Now, if you'll excuse me. Just ring the buzzer if you need anything."
"Thank you." Clarke said, her voice still hoarse.
As soon as the door to Clarke's room closed, Bellamy sat back in his chair. He'd yet to let go of Clarke's hand.
"How do you feel?" Bellamy asked.
"My throat hurts, I have a headache, and my stomach kills, but I'm okay." Clarke smiled.
"Let me get you some more water." Bellamy said, standing up. But Clarke gripped his hand tighter, stopping him.
"Wait." Clarke said.
"What's wrong, do you need a nurse?" Bellamy said, panicking.
"No." Clarke smiled.
"What is it?" Bellamy asked, sitting down again.
Clarke opened her mouth to speak but something stopped her. She closed her mouth again, took a deep breath and pulled on a smile. A smile that even Bellamy could tell wasn't completely real. She squeezed his hand.
"Tell me about the trial." Clarke whispered.
"Is that really what you wanted to ask me?" Bellamy raised a brow.
"No, but tell me anyway." Clarke whispered.
"Well, I got six months community service and a hefty fine, but it's nothing I can't handle." Bellamy smiled. He then went on to tell her how amazing Lexa was and how she'd more or less saved his life. He also told her how someone from Cage's team was also there.
"He wasn't happy." Bellamy chuckled.
"That must be how Cage found out. That's what made him so angry." Clarke nodded.
Bellamy swallowed around a lump in his throat and nodded his head.
"What happened? At the café." Bellamy asked.
"Well, we were all waiting for Octavia's call when he came in, he smashed the door, which I'll have to pay for, he called me a stupid bitch and then he shot me. Then he just disappeared." Clarke shrugged. She was far too calm for Bellamy's liking.
"Don't worry about the door, Monty's mom will have insurance." Bellamy shook his head. "I'm sorry I wasn't there, Clarke."
Clarke gripped his hand tighter. "Don't be. It's not your fault."
"And it's not yours either, remember that." Bellamy said, his thumb rubbed the soft skin on her hand.
They fell into a comfortable silence. Bellamy simply watched Clarke, smiling softly to himself. He couldn't put into words how relieved and grateful he was to have Clarke sitting here in front of him, alive and awake. Looking into her blue eyes, Bellamy silently vowed that he'd never take another moment with Clarke for granted. He'd do everything in his power to make sure that she had a safe and happy life, whether that life involved him or not.
"Why are you smiling at me?" Clarke said, her lips curving into a smile of her own.
Bellamy pressed a kiss to the back of her hand. However, before he could answer, there was a knock on the door. Clarke called out for the newest visitor to come in, and Bellamy looked over his shoulder just as Octavia's head appeared around the door.
"Hey, O." Bellamy said.
"Hey, Clarke, you up for some visitors?" Octavia asked, smiling widely.
"Who?" Clarke asked, her brows furrowing in confusion. Bellamy now realised that Clarke was completely unaware that her friends had been waiting in the corridor.
Octavia opened the door and waved everybody in. Clarke's eyes widened as Lincoln, Murphy, Miller, Raven, Jasper and Harper filed into the room, all looking just as pleased as Bellamy felt to see Clarke awake.
"What are you all doing here?" Clarke asked as Jasper wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
"Are you kidding? We couldn't leave until we knew you were okay." Monty said. Clarke's eyes flicked over to him, her eyes widening when she spotted the blood stains on his t-shirt.
"Have you been here the whole time?" Clarke asked, looking around at the faces of all her friends.
"Of course we have." Raven nodded. "Like Monty said, we weren't leaving until we knew you were okay."
Clarke looked up at Octavia who was stood next to Lincoln.
"How long have you guys been here?" Clarke asked.
"We came straight from the courthouse." Octavia answered.
"We got here about an hour before you woke up." Bellamy finished off.
Tears gathered in Clarkes eyes as she looked around at her friends. Bellamy worried this would be too much for her, but he also knew she needed this. Clarke needed to know that she was loved and that these people were her family, that they were all here for her.
"Thank you, guys, really." Clarke said as a single tear slid down her cheek. "And Monty, I'm so sorry about the café, I'll fix any damages."
Bellamy rolled his eyes and smiled to himself.
"No you won't. Don't worry about it, it's all taken care of." Monty said, dismissing her.
"Told you." Bellamy smirked.
"What happened to Cage?" Clarke asked, ignoring Bellamy.
"Well, after he shot you, he ran out. Murphy and Miller ran after him while we called for an ambulance but Cage had a getaway driver waiting for him. So, Raven called the police and then we came here." Monty explained.
"The police are looking for him anyway." Octavia said. "After that trial they're hunting him down fast."
"Good." Clarke nodded. "I can't wait for all this to be over."
Bellamy squeezed her hand again. "The first steps to freedom start now, Princess."
~~~~
Clarke had never been so overwhelmed with such emotion before. Even when she'd first started dating Cage, when everything was good and she still had friends, she had never felt so much emotion. She had never felt so loved and wanted. She was quickly starting to realise that Clarke wasn't simply tolerated by these people, she wasn't around just when it suited them. She was genuinely wanted, she was genuinely loved. These people cared about her for who she was, not what she could provide. They didn't want anything from her but for her to be herself. And for the first time in over four years, Clarke was finally starting to feel that way again.
Looking around at the faces of all her friends, she smiled to herself. Octavia had perched herself on the bed by Clarke's feet, Raven had pulled up another chair on the other side of her, opposite Bellamy. The others stood around the bed, laughing and joking. Bellamy hadn't moved from his spot beside her. He'd held her hand the entire time, even when he turned his head to talk to Murphy and Miller, he hadn't let go. Clarke appreciated the support. She felt his comfort radiate through his palm, a caring touch that made Clarke feel warm inside.
An hour later, a nurse walked into the room and announced that Clarke needed to rest and that they'd all have to leave. Clarke didn't want them to leave, she didn't want to be left alone, not with Cage still out there somewhere. But she wouldn't tell her friends that. She didn't want them to worry any more than they already had. She'd put them through enough today. After a round of hugs and teary goodbyes on Clarke's behalf, everyone left until the only one left was Bellamy.
"I'll be right there." Bellamy said to Octavia as she walked out. He turned to face Clarke, running a hand down her face. "You make sure you get some rest, okay."
"I'm not moving any time soon." Clarke said, forcing a smile.
"What's wrong?" Bellamy asked, brows furrowed together.
"I got shot?" Clarke said, equally confused by his question.
"No." Bellamy shook his head. "I know that, but you've been smiling for real since everyone came in, now everyone's leaving and your smile is forced."
"How can you tell?" Clarke asked, brows raised in surprise.
Bellamy let out a chuckle and leant down to press a kiss to her forehead. "Because believe it or not, Princess, I've learnt a thing or two about you since we met."
Clarke rolled her eyes but she couldn't stop the real, genuine smile that crept onto her face.
"I'm fine, really." Clarke sighed. "I just.. It's just.. Never mind, I'm okay, promise."
Bellamy sighed and sat down again. His eyes roamed over her face, taking her in. Clarke swore she could feel the pathways his eyes traced on her skin, burning into her. It was like he could see straight into her mind, straight into her heart.
"You know he can't get to you in here." Bellamy said softly.
Clarke nodded her head. "I know, I've just spent so long looking over my shoulder, so long being scared that I don't know how to stop." She looked down at her hands, suddenly embarrassed by her fear.
She heard Bellamy sigh softly before he stood up and pulled on his jacket. Clarke watched him, suddenly nervous for a whole different reason. Was Bellamy about to walk out on her? Had her confession been enough to make Bellamy realise that she was too broken? That she wasn't worth it?
"I'll be right back." Bellamy said, walking out the door.
Clarke stared at the door. For twenty five minutes, she stared at the back of the closed wooden door. Tears gathered in her eyes as she started to accept that Bellamy wasn't coming back. She leant back on her pillow and let the tears fall. She looked up at the ceiling, willing her heart to slow down and return to a more normal pace. He'd left her.
Another ten minutes passed and Clarke heard the door open again. She remained still, waiting for a nurse to do her job or ask if she needed any pain relief. Instead she heard a panicked gasp.
"Clarke? What's wrong? Does it hurt? Do you need a nurse?"
Clarke looked up quickly to find Bellamy rushing over to her. He stopped beside her, running a hand down her face, eyes scanning her entire body.
"You came back." Clarke whispered.
"Of course I did, I told you I was." Bellamy said, smiling softly at her. "I just had to take care of something first."
Clarke looked around and finally spotted the pillow and blanket discarded on the chair behind him.
"I don't understand, what's this for?" Clarke asked, pointing at the chair.
"Fancy a sleepover?" Bellamy grinned at her.
"You're staying?" Clarke gasped, looking up at him in surprise.
Bellamy nodded his head, still stroking her hair out of her face. "As long as you need me."
Clarke started crying again, only this time, they were happy tears. She was starting to get tired of crying, she'd done nothing but cry since she woke up. She was certain she should have ran out of tears by now, yet they continued to fall down her cheeks.
"Thank you." Clarke whispered.
Bellamy pushed a firm kiss to her forehead, Clarke had a feeling she'd never get sick of him doing that, and sat on the edge of her bed beside her.
"Get some sleep, Princess, I'll be right here." Bellamy smiled.
Clarke nodded her head as Bellamy moved into the chair beside the bed. Clarke tried to move into a more comfortable position and Bellamy watched her every move.
"You okay?" Bellamy asked.
"Yeah, I'm okay." Clarke said, settling down. She hesitated before she looked up at him. "Will you, um, will you lay with me?"
Bellamy smiled at her before nodding his head and climbing onto the bed beside her. He made sure to move slowly so he didn't cause her any more pain. Once he was settled beside her, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, letting her rest her head on his chest. Clarke breathed in his scent, letting his warmth and comfort wash over her. Neither of them said a word, they just laid together. Clarke's eyes started to feel heavy, so she closed them, finally feeling safe and relaxed enough to fall asleep.
"Clarke?" Bellamy mumbled into her hair.
"Hmm?" Clarke mumbled, eyes still closed.
"I love you, too."