- I beg you! Believe me! I would never deceive you! I am not crazy! I did not free them! I didn't kill our friends! I beg you!!!
With these words, Noa greeted all those gathered, being led by three of Rainer's men straight into the forest, which, surrounded by the fairy-tale aura of the ongoing winter, was to become the place where the black fox would die.
Although Rainer was aware that Noa was telling the truth, his behavior and panic before the bloody ritual was performed on him did not indicate his full mental strength. On the other hand, how was a man whose bones were about to be plucked out alive supposed to behave? Especially if he really was innocent of what he was about to die for.
If Rainer was afraid of anything in his life, it was three things. The first was religious fanaticism, which Noa had recently exhibited in what one might almost say a textbook fashion. Wolf, although a believer in the Norse gods, was a Viking, he never approved of blindly carrying out the uncertain and vague will of the gods. Therefore, getting rid of the black fox should, in a sense, satisfy the man. It should, but it did not satisfy. On the contrary, Rainer continued to feel remorse for making Noa a blood sacrifice to the gods. Despite what the man had done, the wolf could not look on without a shadow of regret at what was about to happen. Until now, he had considered Christians to be religious fanatics, believing in a god who let himself be killed. Rainer did not understand how one could worship someone who let himself be killed without a fight. That's why, among other things, he now considered Noa a fanatic in the likeness of Christians. Agape almost killed him, yet he continued to worship her.
The second thing that could give Rainer the creeps was magic. Although the rebel leader did not believe in sorcery and was its chief critic, somewhere in the back of his mind there were always thoughts of what if some kind of sorcery could exist? After all, the blood eagle ritual was one of the activities widely understood to be magical. After all, no man could be sure of getting Valhalla after death unless he died with a weapon in his hand. The blood eagle was the only exception to this rule, which in a way always made a man fearful. After all, how were people performing rituals supposed to change the will of the gods themselves? It was common knowledge that this type of execution works in just such a way. It bends the divine laws established by the forefather Odin himself. Rainer was not convinced that the gods could be played with so much, especially since such an important rite would be performed by none other than a Christian woman. At the very thought of it, the man really had chills on his skin.
His third and final fear, however, was much stronger than the fear of magical rituals and religious fanaticism. This thing had appeared in his mind relatively recently, but that didn't stop it from spending sleep in the wolf's mind. The thing Rainer feared most was that Colin could die. The prospect was so cruelly unbearable to the man that he was able to participate in a magical rite whose recipient was to be a religious fanatic. If Rainer, along with today, was to stop fearing the death of another person close to him, he was able to pay the price.
When Noa was brought under two trees with sizable and thick branches, the man was momentarily silent. From among the white smoke of the suspicious-smelling bonfires burning all around, Agape emerged. This one also looked terrifying, despite her attractive appearance of her completely naked body.
The woman had her entire body painted in colors of black and white. Ancient runic patterns were arranged on her body, and her dark makeup on her frighteningly pale face brought to mind the scariest night terrors. Agape held in her hands a knife sharpened to the limit and on her head rested antlers adorned with bird bones.
- I hope Agape gets cold feet and wants to finish this as soon as possible. - Whispered Rainer nervously into the ear of Colin, who was standing next to him.
- We should not joke in this situation. - The teenager rebuked him quietly. - However... I admit, I also wondered if she was cold.
- I bet she is just freezing. - He muttered under his breath to the wolf.
Colin curled his lips and looked at Rainer as if he was about to reprimand the puppy for misbehaving.
- I still can't believe it that you gave her life. - Whispered very quietly the boy looking around to the side. - It's not even about me, it's about you alone.
- It's dangerous, it's true. - Agreed the man quietly, poking Colin's shoulder in the side. - There's a saying... keep your friends close, but your enemies even closer.
Noa was tied with long ropes by his hands to the branches of two trees between him. His legs were bundled so that the man could not make any movement with them. With madness and downright disbelief in his eyes, he stared straight at Agape, who looked like a nightmare from his darkest nightmares.
Accompanied by drums and the smoke floating around her, the woman circled slowly around the man, muttering some ancient words under her breath. With alluring motions of her hand, she threw some herbs into the fires from time to time, which began to squeak and sizzle quietly as soon as they came into contact with the flames.
- "Jag har ingen aning om vad jag gör, jag har aldrig utfört denna ritual." - The woman said, lowering her voice to the limit.
Rainer shuddered as he saw how much Agape was getting into her role. He wasn't convinced that the doe could skillfully slash human flesh, which certainly didn't help Noa in this situation. If she had been familiar with the technique of using a blade, she could have dissected his back with one long and quick stroke of the knife. In a way, this was important, because the faster the man died, the less chance he had of screaming. After all, all it takes is one loud moan of pain, and the black fox will never get Valhalla.
"Of course, as long as this ritual can be performed by someone baptized..." - Thought a concerned Rainer.
Agape had earlier confessed that she had stopped believing that Jesus Christ could save her. But were these assertions enough for a woman to consider herself a follower of the Norse religion? Did Agape believe in any gods at all? Rainer couldn't be sure, and he wasn't.
The woman finally positioned herself in front of the man tied to the trees and turned her small head toward everyone gathered.
- Don't look away. - She said loudly and proudly. - By doing so, you will help your lost friend get to Valhalla.
- You bitch... - Noa hissed through a stress-clenched throat.
The woman slowly turned her face to Noa. Without the taint of a smile on her lips, she captured his cheek in her small, feminine hand.
- Try to dignify this honor and chance given to you by the gods. - She said seriously, but tenderly. It was as if she was sorry.
The man reflexively began to wince and pull himself out of his bindings, which, however, almost completely blocked all his movements. The doe continued to mumble some words under her breath, slowly moving toward Noa's back.
Rainer struggled to see what was about to happen in a moment. His leg was literally trembling and bouncing in place, making him feel a piercing pain in his wound. He realized that this kind of pain was not at all comparable to the one Noa was about to experience.
Wolf explained to himself in his head that there was no other way out. He repeated in his mind that if Agape had not been such a perfect actress, she would have also died today. Nevertheless, Rainer knew how unfair it was that Noa had to die and Agape, who started it all, would survive.
"If only that bitch hadn't impersonated the damn druid so well... For Odin. Politics really is the dirtiest of all the games man has invented." - Thought a wry Rainer.
- I don't want to look. - Colin whispered. - I know I shouldn't feel sorry... but this is... - interrupted the boy, unable to get any more words out.
- You are not guilty of anything. - Whispered Rainer encouragingly. - However, you must look. If we can help this unfortunate man in any way now, it is the only hope. Despite his deeds, he deserves Valhalle.
So Colin reluctantly watched as Agape raised the dagger in a truly theatrical manner. This one shimmered like a mirror reflecting the light of the setting sun. Drums played their ominous music and the women began quietly chanting somber prayers to Odin, Thor and all the other gods. Noa himself looked like he was running amok, as if he was really under the influence of some kind of spell. The black fox lowered his head in anticipation of the kiss of death and with clenched teeth and closed eyes sobbed.
- "Jävla vikingar, jag skulle vilja döda er alla." - Said Agape in a voice that was already trembling from the cold.
Then her hand with the wielded weapon in her hand quickly and gracefully found its way to the man's neck. When Noa became completely immobile and stopped making all possible sounds, it was clear that he was just starting a battle with himself.
Agape, with a stern look on her face, carefully watched as the blade she held in her delicate hand cut the skin on the man's back. Soon the black fox's chin began to tremble in a truly unnatural way. The muscles all over his body tensed up and his heart began to beat so hard that Rainer could have sworn he could see his chest diverging.
- "Detta kommer aldrig att ta slut för jag vill ha mer..." - She quoted Agape some ancient incantation, looking at the man's back almost with hatred in her eyes. What bothered Rainer more was that the words she spoke sounded as if the woman had started singing something.
Noa, no longer able to fully control his own body, parted his lips from which he began to make quiet sounds of pain. Dark red blood began to ooze from his back, which as it fell on the snow began to form some macabre patterns on it. They weren't any specific symbols or letters, but Rainer had the impression that Agape was purposely arranging the knife in such a way as to make the flowing blood from the man's body look as phenomenal as possible.
As the doe began to plunge the knife much deeper into the man's body, the man again became immobile. However, he quickly began to let out "hollow sounds" from his lungs. It was as if Noa's larynx had been punctured and he could not make any sound.
- "...Mer, ge mig mer, ge mig mer." - She continued to sing in a truly demonic manner, slashing the man's body in the process.
Soon the woman bent down slightly and her two hands went straight between the girthy bleeding cut on her back. Suddenly, a quiet but distinctive sound of bones breaking could be heard. As Agape struggled to pull the first rib from the man's body, the vein pierced by the blade gushed blood straight into the doe's black-and-white painted face. Seeing this, Noa's sister bent over and immediately began vomiting up everything she had managed to eat today. Colin also turned pale when he had to look at this gruesome scene. His hands began to tremble and his hair grew auburn all over his body. His green eyes looked as if they had doubled in size.
Rainer, seeing how the boy was doing badly from looking at the bloody eagle ritual taking place, ran his hand along the teenager's arm. Then, crooking himself, without averting his gaze from the dying Noa, Rainer hesitantly yet firmly grasped Colin's hand. The teenage boy immediately, as soon as he realized that the man was holding his hand, began to squeeze it probably with all his might. Although the wolf didn't feel any pain while doing so, he guessed that the fox thus wanted to communicate to him that he might faint soon. In principle, Rainer could not be surprised by this. After all, he himself remembered how he reacted when he first saw this specific ritual with his own eyes.
Agape tossed aside the man's rib bone, all red from blood and with chunks of flesh. Then she again began to drill with her blade into his entrails as if she were searching there for some precious treasure. Unexpectedly, however, despite the woman's iron face expressing no emotion at all, Rainer saw drops of tears flowing briskly from her eyes, mixing white paint with the red of blood.
Red, tarry and thick blood soon began to ooze out of the man's mouth, which, like magma, slowly ran down his chin and stained his black coat. Immediately after, the man splashed blood from his throat in front of him and spoke:
- Odin. Ancient...
As Agape growled nervously to herself, and with a scream on her lips, she impulsively ripped out another of the man's ribs, his head drooped and his body settled in disarray. Supported only by ropes, the fox quickly let out his last, silent breath of life.
People then stopped beating drums and women stopped praying to the gods. Agape, on the other hand, stood completely naked for a while longer. The man's blood ran down her firm and round breasts just as it ran down her stomach, legs and face. The doe stared at the work she had created on the man's back. She was clearly furious, although tears continued to flow from her crystal blue eyes. The woman then turned her gaze, which fell directly on Rainer. It lasted only a moment, however, because soon she stopped looking at him as well. She muttered quietly some curse under her breath and discarded the dagger along with the bone straight onto the blood-red snow. Then, without another word, continuing to say something to herself with a quick step, she started heading back to her cave.
Noa's sister knelt in the snow and cried loudly, covering her eyes in the process. Although everyone consoled her and assured her that Noa was brave and had surely already made it to the face of the forefather Odin himself, this did not help the woman at all to cope with the pain of losing her only brother. Rainer felt that he should say something now. The truth, however, was that guilt and shame robbed him of any ability to utter words.
The man, unable to look at the black fox's mangled body hanging on the ropes any longer, growled under his breath and turned his gaze away.
- Come on. - He said to Colin, while pulling him by the hand that he had not let go of all this time.
The wolf, ignoring the pain that had begun to fill his wound after the fight with Axel, with a quick yet clearly lame step began to walk together with Colin to the hideout.
The man all this way did not say even a word to the teenager. Colin himself also chose not to use any words, because also what could be said? The wolf and the fox simply held each other's hands tightly as if one was about to run away from the other. Only after returning to Rainer's part of the cave did the man look questioningly at the boy. He did so because, on the one hand, they no longer had to hold each other's hands, but on the other hand, the wolf didn't want to let go of the boy either. Rainer just had this human need that he could have someone close to him now very close to him. Holding hands was a sufficient form of closeness for the man for the moment.
So when they stood like this in the middle of a cave already plunged into twilight, Colin unexpectedly let go of Rainer's hand only to immediately snuggle into the man's body. When the boy did so, the wolf squirmed from the pain he felt when the teenager accidentally poked his wound.
- Forgive me. - Said Colin with regret in his voice. - I really didn't want this.
- That's okay, there have been worse times. - Replied the man, who slowly began to embrace the boy with his massive arms. - It's all right.
- I didn't mean your wound... although in a way it is also because of me... - replied the boy gloomily.
Rainer did not even wait a moment to react to Colin's words. He immediately raised his hands in which he embraced the teenager's foxy head and lifted it so that they could look into each other's eyes.
- Also? - Asked the irritated man. - Don't say that again. If anyone here is responsible for the Noa case, it's only me. - He added in a rather threatening tone of voice. - Do you really think I could watch your death and in such a way? For Odin, do you really think I could have allowed this to happen? - He asked in a nervous tone of voice, staring straight into the boy's emerald eyes. - I don't blame you for anything because you did nothing wrong. You just found yourself in the wrong place at the wrong time, that's all. Noa's death... Noa's death and the Agape deal was the only way for me to finally keep you safe and calm my people down. There is no fault of yours in any of this, so... so goddamn it, stop talking like this.
The boy curled his lips and his ears drooped. Rainer saw exactly how his nose began to twitch. The man already knew the boy enough to know that when the corner of his mouth or nose twitches it means that the boy has a torrent of conflicting, extreme thoughts in his head.
- "Friends are kept close, but enemies are kept even closer." - The boy quoted the words of a man from before Noa's execution. - Why do you say such untruths in such a case?
- Why do you think this is untrue? There is some truth in it. - The man replied, raising one eyebrow in the process.
- You know... because during the course of this ritual, I think it was only then that it came to me, it really came to me, that I have no closer person than you... And I don't consider you an enemy after all... - Said the boy in a rather sad tone of voice. - If it weren't for you, I would be holding back my screaming today....
Rainer, hearing these words, immediately smiled at the boy. He reflexively tucked the fox's head under his bearded chin and his hand grasped his neck carefully.
- You're the smartest person I've ever met in my life, and you're worried about some silly proverbs. - Replied the wolf a little amused. - Well, you're right. This proverb is really stupid.
- You know Rainer... this is all really hard for me. - The boy began in a breaking voice. - In such a short time, so many things happened... but... when I watched Noa die. By the gods... only then did I understand everything, in fact everything. At the same time, it made everything even more complicated, although I still know what I have to do.
- That is, what did you understand? - Asked in a calm tone of voice already a man.
- Magnar plans what to do to sink a sword into your body, not even bothering about the prospect of my death or his own brother's death. You plan everything you can to make sure no one sinks a blade into my body, risking your own life... the lives of your people... Noa. - Admitted the boy quietly. - After all, the rebels themselves would probably kill you if they found out that you planned to take me to Jarl Thea. You didn't sound the alarm, you ran after me and Axel yourself. You can hide behind political considerations, but your camp was turned upside down just so that no one could harm me here... No one has ever sacrificed so much for me, and I owe no one as much as I owe you.
- You also saved my life, kid. - The wolf stated with a slight smile. - We are even and you owe me nothing. You have no debt to me.
- You saved my life more than once. - Replied the boy confidently. - It really is all so complicated and... difficult....
Rainer took a moment to consider the teenager's words. Then, releasing him from his strong embrace, he looked him in the eyes again, holding his hand behind what neck.
- It's about your father, right?
- Yes... - replied the teenager reluctantly. - The gods command obedience to parents... but... hell, how can I fight against someone who has done more for me in two months than my father did for eighteen years of my life? Why should I obey someone like Magnar? Why should I fight against you? Against your... your friend? At the same time, should I contribute to the death of my own father? I can't put all these aspects together in my head....
Rainer hearing all this did not feel good. On the one hand, he was pleased with how the situation had turned out. The fact that Colin had officially joined the rebellion was one of the more positive things that had happened to him in recent times. For it solved many of Rainer's problems and also completely shattered that invisible wall that had risen between the teenager and the wolf. Only that for Colin it really couldn't have been such a simple decision and from his reflections, the boy nevertheless continued to feel bad about himself. Fox was well aware that Magnar was a cruel man. He knew, understood and supported the demands for which the rebellion is fighting. But could all this be enough for Colin to help kill his own parent? Although Rainer had his obvious reasons for not being able to spare Magnar's life, to Colin the villain there still remained a father. It didn't matter how much of an evil parent the sinister fox was. Unfortunately, he continued to remain his dad.
- You love him. - The man stated a little too unemotionally. - I know he's your father that's why... I'm not surprised... - He admitted a little beaten down, not convinced about his own words.
- Love... love is a difficult feeling to define. - Answered the boy uncertainly. - I certainly feel awe of him, respect but also... afraid of him. Lately I have started to think a lot about the aspect of love. On who you can love and who you can't... what this feeling manifests itself as and what you feel yourself then.
The man, hearing these words, stood still for a moment. He tried to quickly analyze the boy's words, trying to dig out the deeper meaning of his words. However, unable to stop himself, he interrupted his own thoughts and spoke up:
- ...What conclusions have you come to? - Asked the wolf, sticking his gaze into the wall of the cave.
The boy also stiffened, which made Rainer even more stressed. His heart momentarily began to beat harder and his hands reflexively began to tighten on the boy's shoulders.
- That ... feelings are hard to fight. - Colin replied evasively. - For example, that's why I have these dilemmas... dilemmas... I mean dilemmas about my father. That's right. That's what i wanted to say. - He said in an abashed and panting voice.
The man, upon hearing these words, lowered his ears and head. He felt as if something pricked his heart, although he didn't quite know what.
"Actually, what do I expect from him? He did everything I wanted and even more. Why do I even ask such questions? After all, I talked to him about Magnar and not about... us. And even if he had said something about me and him what would it have changed? I'm a guy, so is he... I'm stupid. Very stupid." - Thought the man annoyed with himself.
Abashed by the boy's response, Rainer let him out of his embrace slowly and looked to the corner of his part of the cave. For a moment they stood like that in silence listening only to their own breaths.
- I'll bring some board. - Colin suggested. - I'll start drawing a plan of North Hill on it with charcoal. The sooner you start learning where the dungeons are, the gate entrance and so on, the better.
- Good idea. - Replied the man sadly.
As soon as Colin left the room, Rainer sat down heavily on the piece of trunk serving as a chair and painfully supported his head on one hand. The fact that the man was feeling sad was evident from him at first glance. It was only a moment ago that Rainer realized that even when Colin was completely safe, it didn't change anything in their relationship. It's not that the wolf expected any acts of gratitude and adoration from the boy. In fact, the man did not think at all about what would happen next. He did not foresee any specific plans for how the relationship with Colin might turn out now or when the war ended. All his attention was mainly focused on simply protecting the fox at all costs. His malaise was due to the fact that when the darkest clouds dissipated and the fox's life was secured once and for all, Rainer's desires began to claim their "prize." Previously, the wolf didn't even have much time to think about anything in these terms. His inner needs were suppressed by more important matters. But now that the man no longer had to worry day after day and figure out how he could buy more safe time for the boy, nothing stood in the way of his heart beginning to speak openly to him and overshadowing rational thinking.
"Let's face it." - The nervous man began to think. - "I want him. I want his happiness and my happiness. I want to touch him, I want to see his smile and his eyes. I want to hear his voice every day, to wake up with him and fall asleep together. I want to read with him about distant lands, I want to run away with him to those damned, non-existent lands. They can even be enchanted, but for him to just be by my side. Damn... I deserve it, and he deserves that little bit of happiness too after all that has happened... but... how can I tell him that I feel something for him? If he doesn't feel what I feel... by the gods be damned. If I tell him and he thinks I'm crazy, I won't have his friendship or affection. All I'll have left is fucking pity... although after that night I'm not sure he hasn't just started showing me pity..."