Nox rubs the white towel across his short hair. The bath lasted longer than usual as he was deep in thought. His clothes were already on and he only needed to blow dry his hair.
In front of his bathroom mirror, Nox could only sigh. Bags under his eyes were already present, but they became more noticeable over the last few days. Touching his chin with his hand, he feels only the scruff of his beard.
Nox considered shaving the beard, but decided not to.
As he continued to look in the mirror, he didn't see anything different. Everything was just as it always had been. It wasn't pretty, but it was him nonetheless. Taking the blow dryer from underneath the sink, Nox ventures into his room.
Spot and Loki were sleeping. Chizu however was focusing on the fish in its tank.
Nox shook his head, "Don't even try Chizu, he's not food." Chizu stopped trying to climb to the tank and instead began chasing his tail.
He tossed his towel in the basket and slumped against his bed, his back against the bed. The dryer was plugged into an outlet and set on low so as not to disturb his pets.
As he washed his hair, Nox once again was back to thinking.
'I need to find someone, anyone to help me.' The warmth coming from the dryer made him a little calmer.
Nox was angry after speaking with Rat. She wasn't obligated to assist him, but she was all he had. He could cope and somewhat enjoy his life because of her. He was able to join the military because of her. Without the drugs, Nox would have to quit his work, everyone would find out, and he would be labeled a freak.
Just like his parents said.
A solitary tear streamed down Nox's cheek. He exhales and drops the dryer to wipe it away. Another came down just as he did. He tried again to wipe them away, but they persisted.
Nox was soon sobbing gently into his hands. He sobbed for the first time, clutching his knees to his chest, unsure what to do. He was pitiful, and instead of manning up and determining what he should do, he was lying on the floor. Engulfed in his own self-pity.
But he just couldn't stop.
The thought of anyone finding out broke his heart. He wasn't like everyone else; he didn't look or act like an omega. No one would ever desire him, and Nox was perfectly content with that. He was... so why did his heart hurt so much?
A sniffle sounds in the room, as Nox finally manages to stop crying. Spot's snout then landed on his still somewhat damp hair. Loki rubbed against his leg. When he looked up, he saw Chizu pawing at him.
Nox's face is filled with a sorrowful smile.
"T-thank you." His voice is raspy as he speaks. He strokes them all, feeling lighter having them around. "What would I do without you guys?" He sighs, tugging Spot's cheek and receiving a lick on the cheek.
He barks out a small laugh with a, "Stop it!"
Spot comes to a halt but continues to brush his face on Nox's. Loki had gone to the edge of the room and was staring at Nox. He wasn't sure what she wanted at first, but then it hit him.
He groaned, "Loki, I was just in there. It's bad enough that my pills don't work. Going into my nest might speed up whatever is happening." He was aware that he was attempting to persuade a cat, but it was mostly himself too. Nox was desperate to enter his nest.
He obviously needed that after what happened today. The familiar and comfortable fragrances would undoubtedly distract him from the fact that everything in his life had suddenly gone to shit. But what if things actually got worse?
'I guess either way it wouldn't matter. Because I will find new pills that work, and everything will go back to normal. One night in my nest can't be that bad.' Nox reassured himself.
Sighing in defeat, he stood up. "Alright, fine. I do need this, but after no more nesting."
Loki gave him a 'Yeah right' look that Nox wanted to be offended by, but even he knew. If there was one thing he couldn't resist, it was nesting.
When he first nested it was the best feeling he'd ever felt. As soon as he had woken up the next day, the first thing he said was, "Fuck, this is going to be a problem."
Nox walked to the door, collecting his key as he exited his room. As he unlocked and opened the door, they all followed. Walking in appeared to cast a warming spell over Nox, who had a small smile on his face. He closed the door and crawled into the nest's center. He rolled onto his back and looked up at the ceiling. He inhaled the scents as he felt safe again. His mind felt clear, and his body was at ease.
Everything was in shambles today, and Nox didn't want to deal with it. He simply wanted to be regular, to be a beta.
He felt much better in his nest. As he breathed pleasantly, his anxieties from the day began to fade.
As he cuddles up, he pulls the blanket over him. As Nox went off to sleep, his companions surrounded him.
♦♦♦
14 years ago
[Possible Trigger Warning: Read with caution]
Nox opened the car door, jumping out. He grabbed his backpack, swinging in on his back as he shut the door. He glanced around before knocking on the front passage seat window. It opened to reveal the same middle-aged man in a suit that drove him every day.
"Thank you." Nox says, earning a small smile from the man.
"You're welcome young master."
The window closed and the car drove away. It was a shame Nox still didn't know the man's name. His excuse was always he didn't need to know.
Nox shook his head and turned to his house. The beautiful mansion, that looked straight out of a fairytale. The gardens were kept perfect and pretty, and anyone looking at it would dream of living there.
Except Nox, this wasn't a fairytale house, he didn't wish to live here. It was his prison, and personal hell.
He fists tightened on the straps of his backpack as he walked to the front door. As usual it opened before he could even get there. A maid greeted him, "Welcome back young master."
Nox nodded as he entered.
Every day when he returned from school, no one welcomed him save the servants. He only saw his parents when they were eating dinner. Even then, Nox despised seeing them. He despised his parents, but he was also terrified of them.
He walked up the stairs and along a lengthy corridor. He stared at the artwork on the wall as he went. Nox recalled how, when he used to paint, his mother would beam with delight when he showed her his work.
Nox sighed and continued down the hallway. His room door was in sight, but it was strangely open? Who would be in his room? His room was spotless, and maids never needed to clean it. As he made it to his room he entered.
The large room, which was formerly filled with toys and pink frilly garments. It was now mostly empty, with only a desk, a wardrobe, and his bed. The walls, which were previously pink, were now a drab brown.
But that wasn't what had Nox's attention. His gaze remained fixed on his father, who was standing next to his desk. "Good afternoon, father," he said quickly. He welcomed the man with a flat tone and expressionless face as to not anger his father. His father was easily enraged.
As he straightens up, he notices a movement on his bed, which alerts him to the presence of his mother. He opened his mouth to ask why she was there, but then he shut it.
Nox's pupils dilate and his gut twists. While gripping his backpack, his knuckles turn white. He takes a step back as his legs begin to tremble.
In his mother's delicate and soft hands, was a bright pink bow.
His throat dried up as he returned his gaze to his father, observing now his shining eyes filled with fury. Before Nox could blink, his father stomped at him. His hair was now being yanked tightly.
"No! W-wait! I'm sorry!" Nox tried, but it was too late. He was thrown onto the floor.
"You disobeyed me, Nox! You know the rules!" His father booms in anger slapping him across the face.
Nox stopped himself from crying out from the pain, instead, he just held his cheek looking up at his father. His father hated it when he cried during a beating. "I've told you time and time again, you will not have such things in my house! You are a man!"
His mother gets off the bed tossing the bow in the trash next to Nox's desk. His heart shattered as he watched. That bow was all he had, it came from months of him secretly working and building up enough courage to finally buy it. Every day he would leave school early and look through the glass window of the boutique.
Now it was gone.
His mother placed a hand on his father's shoulder, "Calm down honey, it must be his omega side. The pills might not be working as strong."
Then, Nox watched in horror as a disgusting and evil smile spread on his father's face. "Is that so?"
He leans down and grabs Nox's chin. "Well then, I think I know a few buddies who would love to try and fuck the omega out of him. I'm sure they're up to experiment." He smirked.
Nox's heart dropped and he couldn't believe what he was hearing. he immediately began thrashing, trying to get away from his father. "Let go!" He screamed. Normally he wouldn't fight back, he never dared to as the beatings got worse if he did. But this was different, he couldn't let his father do this.
His throat was grabbed and Nox wheezed and choked in pain as he was pulled up to meet his father's eyes. "Don't even think about it brat!" Nox clawed the hands around his neck.
Then Nox's father let go, and he gasped for air. He didn't have time to enjoy his liberation before his father grabbed his wrist and yanked him out of the room.
"No! Stop please! I won't do it again!" He pleaded as his father pulled him down the hallway.
"Oh, you won't! I'll make sure to tell them you like it rough!" His father laughed.
Nox couldn't stop weeping at this point. He attempted everything he could to break away, yelling and kicking, but it was futile; his alpha father continued to drag him.
"Please! Please!" But it meant nothing, he meant nothing. Nox was dragged to face his punishment and he was powerless to do anything about it....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
♦♦♦
Nox exclaimed as he jerked upright. He glanced about in panic, not knowing where he was at first.
It took him a moment as he began focusing on familiar things, such as Spot staring at him with his head inclined. He began to slowly calm down.
He was still breathing heavily, as he rubbed his face. "Fuck."
Nox hadn't had that dream in a long time. He was hoping he'd never have that dream again.
As his heart rate returns to normal, he takes deep breaths. He hears a quiet rigging while petting Loki, who was still asleep. He glanced around but couldn't find his phone. He must have forgotten about it in his room. He reluctantly rose from his nest and made his way out of the room.
He realized what the noise was as soon as he exited the room. The doorbell was being rung. "Who the hell-" He grumbled as he rushed inside his room to retrieve his phone.
It was 6 a.m. and definitely not the time someone would be ringing his doorbell. He was only wearing just a black shirt and white sweats so he trudged downstairs, making his way to the door assuming it was Toru.
He was still so tired and the nightmare was still fresh in his mind. He did not have the time to deal with Toru right now. He unlocked the door, opening it, "Toru I swear to-" He stops midsentence.
As he looked down at Hotaru, Nox's eyes widened. She was dressed perfectly as usual in a dress shirt and button-up pants. Her hair was braided like it always way, but what was odder than her being at his house was that she was carrying luggage.
"Good morning, Nox." She smiles up at him.
Nox was rendered speechless. He didn't know what to do now that her scent was in his face and he could do nothing but inhale it. What was she doing here? Her sent alone was causing his legs to tremble slightly. He was hoping she didn't notice.
She looked him up and down, "Nice to see you in something other than a suit."
Nox had an unusual need to cover himself from her hungry stare. He must have misread her glance since he knew she didn't desire him. Why would she? Finally, out of his stupor, he clears his throat, "What are you doing here?"
"I'm sorry to appear out of nowhere but something happened last night. May I come in to discuss it?" She asks softly.
Nox stiffened; he'd never let anyone into his house before. Except for the workers who built it, no one had ever been in his house. If someone else had asked, he would have grumbled 'No' and slammed the door in their faces. But the desire was not there. He wasn't as defensive as he normally was, and he didn't mind her coming in.
'I can't just leave her out here! I'm her bodyguard.' He told himself.
Another part of him wanted to protest, 'You're her bodyguard at 12 p.m., not 6 a.m.'
Nox fights more with himself. Even though it wasn't his shift yet, he still needed to protect her. Nox had still sprayed smell repellant all around his house to mask the aroma of his nest, so her presence shouldn't create too many problems.
The only issue was his own scent. That he had yet to figure out what to do with. 'It'll be alright; she still believes I slept with an omega.' Nox for once was slightly grateful for his freakish size. He would allow her in for the time being, and then when she left, he'd start working out how to solve his new scent problem.
Finally, Nox nods, "Sure."
Hotaru smiles, "Thank you."
Nox nods, trying not to look at her smile. It had an odd effect on his heart. He takes a step back and watches her enter his house. He wonders to himself. This was the only place he could call "home," so why did he feel comfortable with her presence? Why didn't her scent mingling with his house upset him?
Nox only groaned lowly, walking in and closing the door.
A.N
I love all of you, and thank you.