Hi! I'm back, kind of.
Hello as well to the new readers! Hope you liked what you read so far!
There is an explanation as to why I took the break, at the end of the chapter. If you were curious about what happened, no offense if you are not interested though.
This one is a short one.
Narrator's POV.
If there was one thing that Lizzie hated, was somebody calling her full name, Elizabeth. She never liked how it sounds, it was too formal for her liking.
But she recently found another thing that she hates. No, hate is the wrong word. She couldn't hate it since it was her last name. Correction, she couldn't hate the person calling her 'Olsen' every time she sees Lizzie.
If it was someone else, she would glare and roll her eyes, but whenever Emma refers to her as her last name, she brushes it off easily.
Don't get her wrong, she doesn't have a crush on Emma. No, no. She just doesn't hate the way her name sounds out of Emma's mouth.
She is lying to herself, let her be.
Emma was the newest casted actor but she already made everyone love her. She was both charismatic and kind. Always ready to help whoever was in need. She was geeky and always joking. She would say a pick-up line or a 'dad' joke every chance she got.
So it's fair to say that her personality made Lizzie more interested in getting to know her and befriending the dork. And definitely not fall for her.
"Yoo, Olsen's in the house!" Emma yelled as soon as Lizzie got in.
They were doing a group hang-out at Scar's place.
"Stop calling me that!" Lizzie complained.
"Never!" Emma stuck her tongue out at her.
"Hello, Lizzie! I think you need this." Scar welcomed her with a cocktail in her hand.
"Definitely. Thanks!" She took the drink and drank some.
"Now that everybody is here, let's get drinking!" Evans said while raising his beer up. He was followed by everybody raising their own glasses and making noise.
Lizzie took a seat on the couch, coincidentally, (not really), right next to Emma. But she was in a deep conversation with Brie and Tom Hiddleston about the movie they all 3 played in.
"How are you, Lizzie?" Scar sat next to her. "Everything's good?"
"Yeah. I've been alright. The break was great. I got all of my energy and enthusiasm back, and now I'm prepared for this new project I've signed a while ago." Lizzie rambled.
"Really? I'm very happy for you." Scar offered her a wide smile.
"Thank you. I really needed to get away from everything. It was getting too much." She explained.
"Did you see your sisters or the rest of your family, while on break?" The blonde asked.
"Yeah, I stayed with my sisters for a few days." The brunette responded with a loving smile.
"How are Ashley and Mary-Kate?" Emma suddenly joined the conversation.
'Oh right, I forgot she met them a while ago.' Lizzie thought to herself.
"They are busy, but alright." Lizzie responded.
"How is their business going?" Emma asked again.
"It's better than they expected. It's going more every day."
"That's incredible! Good for them." Emma offered an honest smile.
"They asked about you, you know?" Lizzie quirked an eyebrow.
"Really? And what did you tell them?"
"That you are busy as well with the roles that you keep on getting. They said they miss you which is surprising since you met them like once." Lizzie explained confused.
"I actually met them like 3 or 4 times." Emma corrected.
"Really?" The brunette asked surprised.
"Yeah, I needed some outfits for some red carpet looks. And they were more than happy to help me."
"That's sweet of them." Lizzie smiled.
"Okay, so. Are we spicing this up or what? I'm getting bored." RDJ suddenly interrupted every conversation in the room.
"What do you have in mind?" Mackie asked mischievously.
"What about 'truth or drink'?" He suggested when he received just a few nods, he added. "It's time to find out the deepest secrets that we have. And please don't ask boring questions, otherwise, you will have to drink."
"Who starts?" Evans asks.
"How about you?" Scar said. "Since you asked."
"Okay, shoot." He prepared himself.
"Did you ever have a crush on anyone in this room? If yes, tell us who." She smirked.
"Oooh." Everybody made noise and looked at the now red Chris.
"So, what do you choose? You say or drink?" RDJ asked.
"Okay fine. Um, I used to have a crush on Lizzie." He mumbled. "But not anymore, don't worry." He quickly added.
"Interesting." Lizzie responded with a small blush on her face.
"Tom, your turn." Evans looked in the direction of Hiddleston.
"Okay, ask me."
"Who is a better kisser? Lizzie or Brie?" He smirked.
'Damn, he went there.' Emma thought.
"I think that's unfair to both of them. They were unique in their own ways. So I'll have to drink." He responded before taking a huge sip from his drink.
The game went on for a while, before she knew it, it was Emma's turn.
"Emma, newbie. Your turn." Mackie said.
"Alright." She noded.
"Who in here would you sleep with?" He smirked.
'Shit.'
Everybody looked at her curiously, but she chose not to answer. Instead, she took her drink and took a huge gulp.
"Damn, I wanted to know that." Scar complained.
"Why? You think it's you or what?" She retorted.
"Ha! You wish!" Scar responded.
"Actually not. I have someone else in mind, thank you very much." Emma replied.
"Back with the game. Emma, who do you choose?" Evans said.
"Lizzie." She turned and face the brunette.
"Hm?" Lizzie responded.
"Have you ever roleplayed as Wanda in the bedroom?" She asked with a cheeky smile which made Lizzie blush.
"Actually, I have not." Lizzie responded honestly.
"Missed opportunity." Emma said.
A few turns later, they started to give each other dares to complete in a certain amount of time. The punishment for refusal was not something that anyone wanted, so most of them did their dares.
"Emma. I dare you to kiss the hottest person here. Do it in less than 40 seconds starting now." Stan challenged her.
Knowing she has to go with it since she doesn't want to be punished with doing something way worse than that, she quickly got up. She looked at everyone in the room and then turned to Lizzie and took a hold of her face and quickly kissed her.
Lizzie was so stunned by it that she didn't have time to respond to the kiss. Before she realized it, Emma broke the kiss and sat back on the couch.
The brunette looked around to see everyone looking at them with a mixture of surprise and something she couldn't quite put her finger on.
"Evans, I dare you to send someone in your contact list a booty call." She smirked. "You have 5 minutes to get a response.
It's fair to say that the rest of the night went on with a lot of interesting dares and truths that were revealed.
When it got pretty late, a lot of them went away to try and get some sleep. Only a few of them remained downstairs.
"So, Olsen. It looks like we are going to be bunking together tonight." Emma said with a cheeky smile. The alcohol that she drank was enough to give her a bit of courage while taking away her anxieties.
"Can I ask you something?" Lizzie finally gathered her courage. Same as Emma, the alcohol gave her the push that she needed.
"Anything you want, Olsen." Emma gave her full attention.
"Why do you keep on saying my full name?"
"Well, it's your name, isn't it?" Emma said confused.
"Then, when are you going to stop calling me that?" Lizzie asked again.
"When your name becomes Bartley." Emma said with a smirk.
"Wait, what?" Lizzie asked confused.
"You heard me, Olsen. When you'll change your name, I will call you by your first name."
"And how do you plan on doing that?"
"Well, you will have to marry me. Obviously." She shrugged.
"Are you saying that you have feelings for me?" Lizzie asked confused.
"I thought the kiss earlier made it obvious."
"Well, how about we go on a date first? And if goes well, we will see about that marriage in a few years." Lizzie said with a blush.
She couldn't believe that the person she was in love with actually returned the feelings.
"Sounds great to me." Emma smiled. "Should we seal it with a kiss? You know, to make it official." She winked.
"I like the way you think." Lizzie responded.
They both leaned in and started kissing.
"I'm so grateful that we are bunking together tonight." Emma said before kissing Lizzie again.
I'm sorry that it's kinda short. I needed to write something to try and get over my writer's block. I hope you still liked it. I will try to edit it in the future, and maybe add a few more things to it. I don't know.
So... Why did I disappear all of the sudden? Well, there are a few reasons actually.
A day before writing the author's note, um, my father was feeling very sick and went into the hospital. Things only went downhill from there. He had a very bad stroke while in hospital and the next day (after I published the a/n) he went into a coma.
February 15th was the last day I saw my father alive. The last day I talked with him, and the last day he talked with me.
So yeah, after 12 days in the coma, he died. I don't wish those feelings on anyone. Waiting for the call from the hospital telling us he is dead, wasn't very pleasant. From the first day in the coma, they told us to not have any hope of him waking up. The chances were way below minimum. So we tried to prepare for the news, but you can't really prepare for something like that. No matter how much you try.
I live with my parents, here in Europe is a common thing for young adults to stay with their families until they have things figured out. It also saves money and quite frankly, anxieties. So, for most of my life, I saw him, and this abrupt change is something to try to accommodate to.
But, I'm not saying it was all rainbows and sunshine, as a common easter-Europe family, the father figure is toxic. And he was very emotionally abusive, and it affected all of us. Sure, we had our fun moments as a family and stuff, but the moments in which he would let his 'inner drama' out, kind of ruin them. Do you get what I mean? Okay, I do understand that there are men worse than him, but there are also men better than he was. We could have it worse, but we still had it bad.
We were emotionally abused, and that's the truth.
So, trying to get in touch with my emotions and thoughts is a priority. But at the same time, I just want things to go back to normal. That's why I will try to go back into writing. I'm sick of feeling sad, I'm sick of being frustrated, I'm tired of feeling down. I will get back up eventually. As I keep on repeating to mom, going down is not an option. I will keep fighting because there is nothing else for me to do. I refuse to let there be another option.
So, I'm taking it one day at a time for now.
I'm very grateful for everyone in my life. We have got a lot of support from sides that we didn't expect to receive any. Close friends have been there for me on some of the worst days of my life. They saw me breaking down again and again, and just supported me until I got back on my feet. I swear to God, this year I have had more mental breakdowns and panic attacks than I had in my entire life. It was awful. His funeral was awful. I'm sick and tired of funerals. In less than a year, I had already gone to 3. I'm done with them. I just need a break.
Besides friends, something that has kept me up were comic books, I have read quite a few this year, and I definitely plan on reading more.
Also, I don't know how many of you know about this show called 'The owl house', but it was something that brought me joy and a spark of happiness, those weeks. I recommend it to you guys. The 'main couple' is made of 2 girls, so that adds points :)).
Anyway, thanks for letting me ramble. I don't know how often my updates will be, but I will try to 'force' myself into writing, 'cause I know myself, and if I let time pass, I won't write anything. So, sometimes, is good to 'push' myself.
Note added later: I'm getting professional help guys, so I will get better. I've been told that I have anxiety (but I already knew that), but it was kinda severe when I went to the consultation.
Note added later x2: I wrote the first part in march in hopes that I would be able to start writing again, but I couldn't. But, I am feeling a bit better than I used to a few weeks ago. Slowly I will get myself back again. I know it's a long process, but it's worth it.
It's nice to be back again.
-M.