Reviewer: AStridGSmile12
Review: The Mind Of A Tipsy Teenager
Client: sushiidew
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The cover depicts our girl, Taylor Sharma- I'm guessing? It's charming, but if you ask me if I got the feel of the book right away from the cover alone, I would have to say, "No, because at first, I thought it was going to be chill and pretty funny." Instead, it was so much more than that, so much more than just funny. And just as well, I thought by the title alone that it was going to be about the preceptive of a regular teenager under the influence of alcohol non-stop when the character actually doesn't overdo it so much with the alcohol. I mean, yes, she drinks, but like once at a party and then once or twice when things get heavy. I literally thought she was going to bring like a Big o' Cup from the 7 Elven filled to the brim in vodka to school and such. Mind you, the author did say tipsy and not straight out drunk. So, in terms of cover and title, I got to say they are not unappealing or below par. But I want to point out that you have so many great instances in your books to choose from for a bomb cover that perhaps helps out the title a little more, like vodka shots on a table with a girly hand or a couple of kids scooby-doing around. The only suggestion for the title is that maybe you think about if you want to convey the story being more about [the mind of tipsy Taylor] or would you rather focus on [the compelling case of the Thompson family massacre]. You could do both- something like- [Solving a Murder while Tipsy and Eighteen]. Now I want to reiterate that both are up to par, especially with what's out there. The author ultimately decides to do what they feel is the best for their stories. I'm just one reader trying to invoke thoughts in the author's head.
In grammar and spelling, I must admit that I found some grammatical errors and typos along the way, but the author clearly warns her readers to look for such things since she is still editing her work.
Just for an example of what I'm talking about, though, in chapter 12 (approx.) paragraph 28, the author wrote,
[Hey!," he exclaimed, adjusting his dishevelled cap.]
One, you don't have to use a comma after the [!] and- [dishevelled] is actually spelled [disheveled].
Also, same chapter 12 but a bit further down, the author wrote,
[Celina thankfully withdrew her hands from my body and placed it on her hips, all the while having a wide smile plastered on her face.]
I believe you mean [them] and not [it], right?
So, I'm sure the author plans to edit the work near the story's completion. Obviously, it needs to be done to have the upper hand when competing.
For this work, the author went for a first-person preceptive and didn't skimp on the attitude or sass in the character's tone. It made for a good time and an easy read. Plus, the mystery involved is not overly complicated, yet it's very gripping. I can tell the author really enjoyed coming up with each day and scene because I loved reading the whole thing. If it were 100% edited through, it would be extra smooth and fierce competition in awards shows.
As I said, I enjoyed this work. Taylor cracks me up and makes me worry for her all at once. I can feel her locked-up history and how it will be hard for her to unveil it to Zain or anyone who doesn't yet know it. I can see she's confident but still just another young adult trying to make sense of the world she has yet to fully embrace, so yeah, she still has moments she can't deal with- very human and relatable.
Zain is sweet and mysterious- I'm still wondering about his relation to Celina and Raven. Oh, gosh, fudging Jace is such a favorite; I can't believe he broke the doorknob. How did you even write that? I wouldn't have been able to press one key down. Celina and Raven are such a pair, and I love the sisterhood feel they got. I'm hoping they imprison the evasive Taylor into it soon. I also would like to mention that Violet seemed genuinely cool, and it shows because when she was killed, it hurt me.
The author is admirably developing her characters and their world very well. It's a major thing to do, and I'm looking forward to reading further updates.
So, if the writer would like to place a review on their blurb or author note, they can put;
"Reading The Mind of a Tipsy Teenager is a blast. If you love a good mystery/thriller, this is the work to lift and read right away. It's got a little of everything and trusts you'll be flipping its pages for more." - Sunflower Community Reviewer Astrid