❝ PRETTY FACE ❞
April 15th, 2021
REAL LIFE — THEO!
THEIR MOTHER'S NAME WAS JODI. It was a good name, and it suited her very well. She had been the one to pick out Theo's full name, and the first of their parents to accept that Techno wanted to be named after the leading weapon name in season three of Ninjago instead of his birth name. Theo's pretty sure their dad still hasn't accepted the name change.
Theo clung to the picnic basket in his hands, glancing up at Techno, who was staring down at the stone grave that held their mother's name and face. There was a picture of Jodi smiling at the camera, taken before Theo had been born but after Techno had turned two. If you looked close enough, you could actually see Techno running in the back of the photo, blurred out so the picture on the stone focused on the woman it served to make people remember.
After a moment, Techno laid out the blanket and Theo got to work setting out the food.
"Did we bring forks?" Theo asked quietly as he pulled out the individual pieces of cake they'd bought at the local market.
"With the cups," Techno told him absentmindedly, fiddling with the necklace around his neck. A J charm for their mom. Theo's dad had broken his in the fight when he'd come out, so he didn't have the same necklace as the rest of his siblings. Something about how his mom would have been ashamed of him.
Theo liked to think she would be more ashamed of her husband than her own son.
"Did mom ever tell you where she got the name Theodore from?" Techno asked, sitting down next to him. "She got mine from her younger brother, he passed away before you were born . . . and she got Chris' from Christopher Robin, dad insisted on that one . . . and Faye from her best friend in college . . . " Techno smiled at him slightly, turning his head. "Theodore was the name of her favorite book character, though. Dad wanted to name you Brian and she fought tooth and nail against that one."
"Good. Brian's a shit name anyway," Theo muttered.
Techno chuckled softly. "Suppose it's a lot better than mine." Theo thought it over before humming in agreement. He had never met his deceased uncle, so he didn't know if the name was a good one or not.
". . . Remember when she took me to see Dan and Phil?" Theo asked. "She complained the entire drive down and back, but she bought me every piece of merch she could and took me to Dennys after the show."
Techno smiled slightly. "She told me she has a lot of fun, not because of the show but because she got to see you excited about something you loved," Techno told him. Theo's heart ached in his chest, but he smiled still, wishing that he had shared more of what he loved with his mom.
"We planned your 16th birthday party together. I wanted it to be Ninjago themed, obviously, but she convinced me to do a theme you wanted to do," Theo said. "We stayed up past my bedtime making decorations together, and then we got to surprise you with breakfast in the morning."
"I remember," Techno said. "I was annoyed with you two for waking me up so early. Now I wish it could happen every day."
Theo leaned his head against Techno's shoulder, looking at the gravestone. ". . . Do you think dad was right, about her being ashamed of me?" Theo asked softly.
"No," Techno said immediately, no form of hesitance in his voice. "She loved you so much, Theo. You were her baby. If she was there that night, she would have taken you away herself and I would have followed. You could ever do anything to make her ashamed of you," Techno told him, almost sternly.
Theo nodded, accepting that answer at face value, because if he thought too much about it, he would end up crying, and he had made a deal with himself the night before that he wouldn't cry, at least in front of Techno. His brother already had too much on his plate to deal with one of Theo's panic attacks.
"Thank you," Theo murmured softly.
Techno had made the sandwiches that morning and kept them cold with an ice pack inside of a Spider-Man lunch box. Theo's was turkey and cheese, plain as could be, while Techno had added lettuce and tomatoes to his own, having a much more developed palette than Theo did. They also had slices of cake, cold apple juice and water, and watermelon cubes packed away in nice little bags. The picnic had been Theo's idea, but Techno had pulled through on the food preparation.
Theo bit into his sandwich, humming happily. "You should quid YouTube and be a chef," Theo commented.
"I already made your meals, don't push it," Techno said dryly, smiling faintly to show Theo that he was just messing around. Theo rolled his eyes, taking another bite before he was done chewing the first. "Don't choke. I know you miss mom but you wouldn't want to see her again too soon."
Theo nearly dropped his sandwich from cackling. "Oh, mom would have smacked you upside the head for that one," he said. "Rip Techno."
"She isn't here to scold me."
"It's like I can still hear his voice," Theo whispered dramatically, yelping when Techno pushed him over. He decided not to get up, instead stretching and curling up on the blanket, still eating his sandwich.
"I'm glad we did this," Techno said after a moment, looking at the grave. "It makes it feel normal, I think. Like she's still with us, but we can move on."
"I think she would want us to move on," Theo murmured.
"And we will, eventually," Techno said. "But we shouldn't forget to visit her every now and then." Theo nodded in agreement, making a silent pact with himself to make the birthday visits a tradition. Even if Techno stopped coming with him — which he doubted — he wanted to keep up the visits, if not for his mom, then for himself.
Theo popped a watermelon cube into his mouth as he sat up, eyes lazily looking around the graveyard — and coming to rest on two men getting out of a white BMW.
His heart sunk and he sat up straight, looking away from them. "Incoming company," he muttered, starting to pack up the basket with shaking hands. Techno frowned, turning to look, and then turned back to Theo with a hardened expression.
"Don't," Techno told him, grabbing him by his wrists to stop him from packing. "Don't let him ruin this."
"I can't— let me go to the car," Theo whispered.
"Theo, I promise he won't lay a hand on you," Techno said. "Just— just a few more minutes, okay? Maybe— maybe he's going to apologize." They both knew that wasn't going to happen, that this was just Techno's attempt to prove how much they didn't need their dad even after they lost their mom, but for once Theo would indulge. He owed Techno so much, and he could at least get started on paying him back.
Chris was almost hiding behind their dad as the two approached them. He had been growing out his beard and looked more tired since Theo had last seen him. Chris didn't live with their dad, he hadn't for a few years now, but he hadn't stopped talking to him, even after Theo had been kicked out — in fact, Chris had taken their dad's side.
Theo stared at his hands as the two got closer, wondering what the play here was. He wanted to leave — to book it and go home and cry. But Techno had something to prove, and he was the one with the car keys.
"Mark," Techno greeted when they were close enough. "Chris."
"What are you doing here, Techno?" Chris asked tiredly.
"Celebrating my mom's birthday," Techno replied coldly. Mark scoffed under his breath. "I guess you're doing the same. There's room for all of us."
"I'm not sitting with a—"
And with the word that left Mark's mouth, Theo got up, grabbed the picnic basket, and left for the car.
Even when he closed the door and put in his headphones, he could hear Techno shouting at Mark and Chris, digging into them for being horrible family members and making special jabs at their dad for the way he's treated the kids growing up, taking the time to make sure both of them knew just how disappointed Jodi would be with their behavior.
Theo was calling Ranboo before he even knew what he was doing.
"Hello!" Ranboo greeted cheerfully, making Theo smile for a moment. "How have you been? You didn't call me yesterday." Ranboo's voice was the embodiment of :( at that moment, but Theo pushed past it.
"Techno and I went to visit our mom's grave today because it's her birthday but our dad showed up and called me a slur, so now I'm waiting for Techno to come back to the car so we can go home," he said, trying to sound casual as he basically trauma dumped on Ranboo. There was a pause over the phone as Ranboo waited for Theo to continue, but Theo was already done.
"Oh— okay. Right. Are you, uh, safe? Your dad didn't hit you or anything, did he?" Ranboo asked. Theo found it sweet that Ranboo was that concerned for him.
"No, he didn't. I'm, uh, I'm in the car, I left pretty quick. Techno's yelling at him though and I'm kind of afraid because I don't want Techno to get hurt on my behalf," Theo admitted, eyeing the three men from behind the windshield.
"I think he'll be okay, he's Techno," Ranboo assured. Theo nodded quietly. "And, uh, you're safe, so that's good."
"Sorry for dumping this on you," Theo said. "I should've texted first."
"No, no, it's fine," Ranboo assured. "I want to be there for you when I can be, okay? So we're good." Theo hummed softly, sitting back in his chair and fiddling with the keys, waiting for the moment Techno got hurt. All bets would be off then — Theo wasn't an adult yet, so a little assault wouldn't keep him in juvie forever.
"Oh, Techno's coming back," Theo said, not realizing that minutes of silence had stretched on. Techno had grabbed the blanket and was walking toward the car, expression twisted into anger. Theo swallowed, turning away. "I gotta go. I'll talk to you soon, okay?"
"Stay safe," Ranboo told him. Theo nodded and hung up.
Techno got into the car, throwing the blanket behind his seat as he slammed the car door. Theo curled up in his seat, staring ahead as Techno started the car and pulled out of the cemetery parking lot. The silence of the car was broken only by the sound of Theo's phone falling onto the floor from the force of the car moving suddenly, but Theo made no move to pick it up, afraid that any movement would make Techno remember that he was there.
Theo expected them to go home immediately, but surprisingly Techno took a left instead of a right and brought them to a McDonalds. He ordered two ice cream sundaes and paid for them, making sure that Theo's was plain, and then they were on the road again, heading home.
Theo glanced at the ice cream with hesitation, wanting to eat it but not wanting to move. His knees were pulled up to his chest, arms wrapped around them — if Techno got into a car accident, Theo might not survive because of the position he was sitting in.
Techno pulled into their apartment building's underground parking, taking their assigned spot. He unbuckled his seatbelt, jaw still clenched tight — that couldn't have been good for his teeth — before he stopped and turned to look at Theo, who continued to stare straight ahead.
"Are you okay?"
Theo glanced up at Techno with a flicker of surprise in his eyes, hesitating for only a moment before he murmured a soft yes. Techno nodded in approval, though it was clear that even he didn't believe that Theo was telling the truth — or at least the complete version, anyway.
"Are you okay?" Theo asked quietly.
Techno clenched his jaw before sighing. "Yeah. I hate that he ruined another good day, but I'm okay. At the end of the day, we have each other and he won't have anyone one day," Techno muttered. Theo thought that was a grim thought to have about their own father, but maybe it was well deserved after everything he had put the two of them through.
". . . I'm sorry," Theo said.
"For what? You didn't do anything," Techno dismissed as he unbuckled his seatbelt. "You—"
"For being a bad kid," Theo blurted before he could stop himself. "If it wasn't for me, you would still be at home and our family wouldn't be divided and it's— it's my fault, right? That there's so much hatred between all of us?"
Techno stopped his movements, staring ahead, before he let out a long, slow sigh. He turned to face Theo, giving him a stern look, more parent-like than Theo had ever seen him behave.
"You— you fucking listen to me, Theodore, and you take in every word I say, alright?" Theo swallowed, nodding — Techno rarely swore, and Techno never used his full name. "You are not a bad kid. You're my brother and I'm going to protect you, because we're family and I love you. You are one of the best things that has ever happened to me, do you understand?" Theo nodded silently, eyes wide. "I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like less than what you are."
Theo felt a lump forming in his throat, but he shook his head anyway, trying to speak past it. "You've always been a great brother," he murmured. "You've never made me feel bad."
"Good," Techno said. "Because no matter what, I will have your back."
Theo's ice cream sundae had melted, but his heart was full of enough love to make up for it.