"Are you sure this is okay?" Meredith asked as she frowned at her reflection in the mirror.
"Meredith, you look beautiful," Derek smiled as he paused tying his tie to kiss her cheek. "I promise."
"I still think you're lying," Meredith sighed.
"When have I ever lied to you?" Derek asked as he reached for the jacket for his suit.
"Never," Meredith frowned as she turned, trying to look at her back in the mirror. "But I give you sex, so you have to tell me I look beautiful."
"Meredith," Derek laughed, taking her hands and pulling her close to him. "There's no reason to be nervous."
"Yes there is," Meredith argued. "I've never been to church before. I've never even celebrated Christmas before. And now I'm being thrown into the perfect fairy tale Christmas with your stupid perfect family, and I have no idea what I'm doing. And I still don't think that me sleeping over at your parents' house is a good idea."
Derek laughed as he kissed her forehead. "Let's talk about this in the car," he laughed, taking her hand and reaching for the overnight bag she'd packed earlier that day. "First of all...church is ridiculously boring, and I stopped going regularly a long time ago. It means a lot to my parents that I go on Christmas so I do, but it's not a big deal. And you'll love Christmas. There's lots of presents and lots of food. My family loves you, probably more than they like me at this point. And I don't care what you say, we're spending the night at my parents'. Nancy and Matt will be there too, and Kath and Chris would be if they weren't with his parents this year. There's no way I'm waking up on Christmas morning without you."
Meredith bit her lower lip as she watched the snow covered Seattle scenery slide by outside the window. "Are you sure your parents don't think I'm some kind of slut?" she asked. "Because honestly, Der, I'm sleeping with the uncle of one of my students. That can't look good."
Derek frowned as he reached over to lace their fingers together. "Mer, we have got to work on getting some self confidence into you," he said. "You are not a slut, nothing of the sort. And yes, you are sleeping with me, but this is so much more than that. One day you won't be Meg's teacher anymore. And I hope that after that day, we can get married and really spend the rest of our lives together."
"Oh," Meredith breathed, suddenly feeling overwhelmed. "Is it warm in here?"
"I'm sorry," Derek said softly, squeezing her hand. "I didn't mean to freak you out. I just want you to know that I'm not leaving you. I know you've never had anyone stay with you no matter what, and I just want you to understand what that feels like. I love you, Mer, and my family loves you. You might not have family of your own, but I'm more than willing to share mine with you, if you'll let me."
Meredith smiled as she turned to stare at him. "You're quite the charmer, you know that?" she asked.
"I try," Derek shrugged with a smirk. "Seriously, Mer, you're never going to be alone again. I'm going to make sure of that."
"Thank you," she whispered as he pulled into a parking lot of a large church and parked his car in the middle of the crowded lot. Meredith leaned over to kiss him gently. "And you'll make sure I don't completely embarrass myself?"
"I promise," Derek laughed. "Everyone will think you're a church expert."
Meredith clutched his hand tightly as she held her coat close to her with the other, trying to make herself like she belonged in church. Derek wanted her there, she wanted to spend Christmas with his family, and especially him. She'd never had a real Christmas before, and she couldn't wait to experience the magic she was sure the Shepherd family made Christmas to be.
She watched curiously as Derek dipped his hand in the Holy Water and crossed himself, briefly wondering if she had to do the same. Derek shook his head and squeezed her hand as he pulled her into the sanctuary. Meredith swallowed hard as her eyes landed on the entire Shepherd family, lined up neatly in a pew in the middle of the church. She'd met all of them at least once, even had a few dinners with Emma and Michael over the past few weeks since she'd accidentally met Derek's mother. She'd always enjoyed their company, but she hoped that when they learned that she wasn't the perfect Irish Catholic they thought she was they might not have the same opinion they had of her right now.
"Hey Mom," Derek smiled as he slid into the pew beside her and pressing a quick kiss to her cheek. "Sorry we're late."
"Hi dear," she said, leaning over him to reach for Meredith's hand. "Hello, Meredith.. I'm so glad Derek finally convinced you to come have Christmas with us."
Meredith smiled nervously. "Thank you," she said softly. "I'm really grateful that you're willing to include me."
"Of course," Emma squeezed her hand tightly before the service began. Derek leaned back in to pew, placing a casual arm over the back of the pew where Meredith sat, giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze every once in a while as he quietly recited the prayers, words he had no doubt memorized long ago and never really forgotten, no matter how little he attended church anymore.
After the service, Derek smiled and laced his fingers through Meredith's. "That wasn't so bad, was it?" he asked.
"No," Meredith smiled nervously, flashing Michael a grateful smile as he helped her into her coat. "Thanks, Mr. Shepherd."
"Michael," he automatically corrected. "And I'm trying to be an influence for my son. Honestly, Derek, did I teach you nothing?"
"Hey, I've tried being a gentleman," Derek laughed as he pulled Meredith close to him. "When I do it, I get in trouble. It seems that just because she's a woman she doesn't need me opening doors for her and pulling out chairs."
Meredith blushed furiously. "That's not true," she argued weakly, even though she knew it was.
"It is," Derek nodded as they walked into the parking lot. "The first and only time I opened her car door for her I was afraid that I was going to lose my hand. And I got a good long lecture about how feminists fought long and hard to prove they were just as good as men and probably better. After that, I was afraid that some more important parts of my body would be not so painlessly removed."
Liz laughed as they stopped in front of the car. "Good job, Meredith," she nodded. "Us girls need to stand up for ourselves."
"Okay, it's cold," Meredith said quickly, moving closer to Derek. "Can we just...drop this and go home?"
"Yes," Derek laughed, moving towards the driver's side of the car and smiling at his family as they piled into the car beside them. "We'll see you back at the house."
"You are in so much trouble," Meredith informed him as soon as he started the car.
"What?" Derek asked, turning to frown at her. "Why?"
"Because now your mom probably thinks I'm some crazy raging feminist," Meredith replied. "Which is so not true, but she probably thinks that anyways and hates me."
"Mer," Derek laughed. "My mom does not hate you. She's already starting to think of you as one of her own daughters. And this is Christmas. You can't be mad at me, it's a rule."
Meredith sighed as she looked at him carefully. "I'm not mad," she said after a long moment. "Do you think...never mind."
"What?" Derek asked.
"It's nothing," Meredith shook her head. "It's Christmas. And tomorrow we get to open presents, which will be fun."
"Meredith," Derek said, effectively cutting off her ramble before it even began.
"I just...do you think we're moving too fast?" Meredith asked. "I mean, we've only really been together for a couple months. And you're talking about marriage. Which is okay, because even though it's really scary, I can see it happening. One day, really far away, I can see us getting married. But is that only because we're still in the happy, I love you no matter what stage of the relationship?"
Derek smiled softly. "Mer, I know it's fast," he smiled softly. "And I have no intention of proposing anytime soon. But eventually, yes, I do want to marry you. But if that freaks you out, just take it in the now. Lots of dates, someone to turn to for comfort, lots of presents and spoiling, and lots and lots of sex."
Meredith giggled slightly. "I like that," she said.
"Good," Derek nodded. "So we'll take it to the next step when we both feel ready. And for now, we enjoy your first Christmas. Okay?"
"Okay," Meredith nodded as he pulled up to the front of a modest, white two story house. "This is your house?" she asked.
"It's where I grew up," Derek nodded as he turned off the engine and reached for her hand. "Ready?"
"Mmmhmm," Meredith nodded, walking up to the porch where Michael was unlocking the front door. "Wow," she breathed as she stepped into the darkness of the house, the white lights from the Christmas tree in the living room in front of them the only illumination within the house.
Derek smiled as he stepped closer to her, sliding his arms around her waist as he rested his chin on her shoulder. "It's amazing, isn't it?" she asked.
"It really is," she nodded, reaching for the bag he'd carried in with him. "I can...I mean, I have presents. Should I put them under the tree?"
"Usually where they go," Derek laughed as he moved away and grabbed her hand. "We'll be in the kitchen in a second," he said to his family as he pulled Meredith into the living room.
"So...this is Christmas," Meredith smiled as she knelt on the ground, pulling a few presents out of her bag and placing it under the tree.
"It is," Derek nodded, frowning as he read the nametags on her presents. "Where's my present?"
Meredith's eyes sparkled as she leaned closer to him. "What makes you think I got you a present?" she asked.
"Because you love me," Derek replied.
"I went down on you in the movie theater last week," Meredith giggled. "I think that's a good enough present."
"That's not a present," Derek frowned. "That's just dirty."
Meredith giggled as she leaned forward to whisper in his ear. "Well...I am a very dirty girl."
"God, Mer," Derek breathed, pulling her closer to him and trying to kiss her hard.
"No," Meredith shook her head, pushing him away. "Definitely no sex in your parents house."
"What?" Derek frowned.
"I'm not some slut who's screwing you just to get off," Meredith replied. "And I want your parents to know that it's not about sex. Plus the fact that it's weird and twisted."
"It's not weird and twisted," Derek shook his head. "Mark practically lived here in high school and he had sex here all the time."
"Well, you're not Mark," Meredith replied as she stood. "And we're not doing it, so just hold out until tomorrow night."
"That's just mean," Derek muttered as he followed her out the door. "They're in the kitchen."
Meredith bit her lower lip as he led her down the hall towards the kitchen, smiling when she saw his parents and sisters gathered around the table, Nancy cradling her new son in her arms. Hot chocolate rested in each of their hands, and a large plate of cookies sat in the middle of the table.
"It's about time you two decided to join us," Michael laughed as he motioned to the two empty chairs at the end of the table.
"So....what are we doing?" Meredith asked as she sat down, gratefully accepting the hot chocolate Emma handed her and biting into a cookie.
"It's our Christmas tradition," Caitlin said. "Before we go to sleep on Christmas Eve we just sit as a family and spend some time together."
"And as much fun as it is to make fun of Derbear, there's no teasing allowed," Liz added.
"It's just nice to spend a quiet few minutes together as a family," Emma sighed. "Although I do wish Kathleen were here."
"I'm personally glad that it's Chris's family's year," Derek said, pressing a kiss to Meredith's head.
"Derek Christopher Shepherd," Emma frowned. "Are you saying you're glad that your sister won't be able to spend Christmas with our family?"
"No," Derek laughed as he wrapped an arm around Meredith. "I'm just glad that Mer has somewhere to be this Christmas."
"I'll second that," Michael nodded, raising his mug in the air for a mock toast. "If Kathleen can't be here, at least I've got another daughter to spoil."
"Oh," Meredith blushed, dipping her head slightly. "I um...I'm really glad to be here too."
"Okay, I've got to get this one to bed," Nancy smiled as she stood. "He's got a big day tomorrow."
"I'll help you," Matt offered, following his wife towards the stairs.
"Yes, I think it's time that all of us headed upstairs," Emma said with a smile. "There's never a dull moment in this house on Christmas."
"Come on, Mer," Derek said, pulling her to her feet. "I'll show you my room."
"Do you....I can sleep on the couch," Meredith bit her lower lip as she glanced at Derek's parents and sisters.
"What?" Derek frowned. "Why would you do that?"
"I just...we're not married, so I thought..."
Michael laughed as he stood and walked over to where the two of them were standing. "Emma and I may be getting old, but if there's one thing we understand, it's what it's like to be in love. You don't need a marriage certificate to sleep in the same bed as our son. We understand."
Meredith blushed, but Derek squeezed her hand as he smiled at his parents. "Thanks Dad," he said. "Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas, son," Michael said as he returned back to the table, smiling at his daughters as he reached for Emma's hand.
"I can't believe you just tried to get out of sleeping with me on Christmas Eve," Derek rolled his eyes as he pulled her towards the stairs.
"Well, your parents are pretty traditional," she sighed. "I didn't know if they'd be comfortable with that."
"They are," Derek nodded. "They're not exactly stupid. We're adults, we're allowed to make our own decisions about being in a relationship. And this....is my room." He opened the door at the end of the hall and smiled as he escorted Meredith into the room, watching the slow smile spread over her face.
"It's very...Dereky," she said.
"Is that a good thing?" Derek laughed, closing the door and making his way towards the bed.
"I'll think about it," she giggled. "You had your own bathroom?"
"My parents took pity on me," he laughed. "I was the only boy, so I was the only one who didn't have to share, and when they all became teenagers and messing around with make up and all that shit my parents managed to make me a small bathroom. It counted as my birthday and Christmas presents for a year, but it was worth it."
Meredith smiled as she slid onto the bed beside him, resting her head in his lap as she stared up at him. "Hi," she said softly.
"Hi," he laughed, a hand automatically going through her hair.
"I like your room," she said. "It's safe and comfortable. And it reminds me of you."
Derek smiled as he leaned down to kiss her softly. "I'm glad," he said with a nod. "I love you."
"I love you too," Meredith whispered, sitting so that she was eye level with him, a hand burying itself in his thick hair. "This has been the best Christmas ever."
"You ain't seen nothing yet," Derek murmured against her lips.
"Merry Christmas," Meredith whispered, pressing her lips against his again.
"Merry Christmas, Mer."