“Do you like Fried chicken more or grilled?” Zayn asked from across my living room.
“Grilled.” I answered as he order on the phone.
It has been a couple of hours since my melt down. Zayn said that he believed me and that he forgives me. He said he knows I have changed and he even apologized for over reacting but he hasn’t been the same. He doesn’t give me that same look that he gave me a few hours ago.
I knew I shouldn’t have told him but I had too. I can’t keep hiding things from him like that. If we were going to get married, then I had to be completely honest with him.
Feeling the couch dip next to me, I noticed Zayn sitting next to me. We both stayed silent as we watched the T.V. It was awkward and weird. I almost regret telling him but it was about time.
Hearing my phone buzz with my message tune, I opened the code and noticed a message from Seif which made me smile slightly;
‘Hope you are feeling better Maggs. Smile cause you make the world shine. ;)’
I smiled at my phone, he was so corny. Feeling my phone buzz again, I read his second message;
‘That was a quote from Noor, she says hey btw. ;)’
Mahinoor was such a lovely girl. I bet she saw that video too and knew I would be sad, that’s probably why she told him to text me this. they were both so lovely and very accepting. Why wasn’t Zayn like that?
Sighing, I typed my reply to them and send it;
‘:D Thank you both for being so accepting and supportive. You guys re the best xx.’
Putting my phone on the table next to me, I noticed Zayn’s look. A look I couldn’t translate. His face was expressionless but his gaze was at my phone until the doorbell rang and he got up to get it.
“Food is here.” He said after paying and closing the door.
I went to the kitchen and got us a couple of plates and silver wear, sitting the table. Zayn emptied the bags and we began eating. I wasn’t too hungry to I just took a bite then played around with my fork over the piece of chicken I had cut earlier.
“Please eat Maggie. You had a long day and you hadn’t had a proper meal.” Zayn sighed looking at me.
Taking another bite, I felt almost full. I know I hadn’t have a meal since yesterday but I wasn’t hungry and this awkward situation wasn’t helping my appetite in anyway.
“Maggie, please.” Zayn said making me frown.
“I’m not hungry Zayn.” I said feeling a bit suffocated with the way he was looking at me so I just got up and went to my room.
Hearing the chair being dragged on the floor, I knew Zayn was coming after me but I didn’t want him to feel obligated to do anything. He wanted to leave and I knew he did but he was staying so I won’t be sad.
Hearing him knock on my bedroom door, I decided to just tell him what I felt, “You can leave if you want. I’m not forcing you to stay.”
“What? I don’t want to leave.” He said confused sitting next to me on the side of my bed.
“I know you do Zayn. You haven’t said a full sentence to me since I poured my heart out to you. I know all you want is to get me to eat so I won’t faint again. I know you don’t really forgive me.” I sighed admitting to the hints he had been sending me.
“I do forgive you, Maggie. It’s just a lot to take in in one day.” He said looking at me honesty shown in his eyes.
Seif forgave me easily enough.
“I’m sorry.” I mumbled not knowing why I was apologizing again but I hated how he was acting right now.
“It’s okay. I know you regret what you did and I don’t hold anything against you Maggie, but..” He paused for a second making my heart drop. I knew it. I knew he couldn’t deal with it. He hates me.
“But?” I repeated in a weak voice.
“Why hadn’t you told me this before? I thought you trusted me enough to tell me everything about your past.” He asked looked at me sadly.
“I don’t know. I just…I thought if I told you any more you would hate me. My past is filled with a lot of horrible things. I’m scared of it Zayn. I’m trying to move on and forget it but it keeps showing up in my life ruining it.” I admitted.
“I’m not going to hate you but don’t you think I deserve to know? You are going to be my wife. The mother of my children someday. And I don’t want any secrets between us.” He said intertwining our fingers together. That gave me hope that maybe he still cared for me. Maybe he still love me.
“I don’t want any secrets too.” I played with his fingers looking at how my hand fit perfectly in his.
“Okay then, this is it. We both come clean on everything now.” He said adjusting his body to lay next to mine on my bed but there is a small space between us.
“This is the last of it, promise. No more surprises.” I smiled looking in his eyes that same caring look there making my heart dance around.
“I’m not talking about surprises, I’m talking about any bad thing you did in your life. Let’s share our worst secrets.”
~~~
“When I was 12, my friend Ant gave me my first cigarette. I didn’t want to smoke at the time but I was too scared of being called a wimp so I smoked it. And I kept smoking till this day. I even kept it a secret till a pap caught me and I got quite the lecture from my father back then.”
I don’t know how many hours it had been since we both started digging deep but it’s been long enough that we got passed our high school secrets and into middle school.
I learnt that Zayn wasn’t an angel himself, he had his first tattoo when he was 15. He kissed a girl when he was 16 and he went all the way with a girl in the same year. He stool his father’s car and ricked it when he was 14 and he called a hooker after he finished the Xfactor.
He used to date a girl before me but he didn’t love her and he did cheat on her more than once. But only after he knew she was cheating on him as well. He went on dates to please management and he even kissed girls in front of cameras just to start a rumor and sell albums.
On the other hand, I told him I started rumors about girls being hookers. Used to dress skimpy and kissed many guys but I never went all the way even though I paid a guy to say that we have.
I had depression at least 20 times throughout my life but I always found a way to come out of it before it got too far. The only time I seriously thought about killing myself was after the whole Aliyah thing.
One time, I stole my parent’s money to go party in London and I got so drunk I ended up passed out in that club and the cops got our parents to get us. My dad took away my phone for a month and put me into an Islamic school in the mosque but I ditched after my second lesson.
“12… Hmm, I made myself throw up for the first time because a girl called Yasmin Ibrahim used to call me a cow just because I had poops and a big bum while most of the girls where flat back then.”
My thumb kept brushing over Zayn’s knuckles, that small gesture made me feel safe with him. It was strange how honest we both were. Less than six hours ago, I was afraid of telling him about Aliyah and now, I’m telling him all my secrets since I was 12.
“Girls are mean.” Zayn frowned, “I pretended to be sick so I won’t go to my grandparents’ house because they were boring. And I few days after that my grandmother died. I never got to say goodbye.”
“Oh god, I’m so sorry Zayn.” I felt sad that he had that guilt since he was a kid, “You didn’t know any better and I’m sure she knows you loved her.”
“Yeah, I know.” He said in a small voice.
“If it make you feel any better, I never knew my grandparents from my mother’s side. My mom’s family disgraced her when she married a Muslim.” I said with a weak smile.
“That’s horrible.” Zayn turned to face me.
“Yeah, I guess. But what I miss the most is having a family. I grew up with just me, Nadia, my mum and my dad. I never had a family until I went to Egypt. That’s why I love your family and your relation with them. It’s so precious you should never take it for granted.”
“They are your family now,” He smiled at me then took my hand between his hands, “I promise to be your family, always.” He kissed my hand making my stomach erupt with butter flies.
Hearing the door being open we didn’t even get a second to look who it is as Aaroosa burst in the room as if it was hers, “Maggie, we brought… What are you guys doing?”
“Get you’re her out of the gutter Rups. We were talking.” Zayn threw a bellow at her.
“I’ll try and believe you. Anyways, we got food. C’mon we are starving.”
***
A/N
Zayn and Maggie made up… yaaaaaay. Okay now I’m team Zaggie again. Love Them *.*
What do you guys think? Comment with your opinion and thoughts. Did Zayn do the right thing by forgiving her?
Now that all secrets are out, when is the wedding?
Lol, I’m joking we still have a few plots to unravel together. ;)
Love you loads my AOL readers.
Your Marz Bars xx