Shawn noticed that the neon four leaf clover he'd given Tricia as a gift was still working perfectly as he walked towards the door of The Good Luck Lounge like he had hundreds of times before. This time was very different, of course, and he was aware of how out of place he now felt as he crossed the threshold into the bar.
Directly at the back of the room stood Patricia and Taryn, who were both engaged in a conversation with an older woman. Tricia looked exactly as she always did with her short spiky gray and pink hair, but her daughter did not. She was still stunningly beautiful, yet her grief showed on her face and she appeared to be exhausted.
"I'm going to go say hello to them," his mum said softly from his side.
"Piper is hungry, so I might find a table and give her a snack first. I'd hate for her to start crying."
His family headed in one direction while he went in the other after grabbing one of the two wooden high chairs Patricia purchased after the bar started focusing on food many years ago. He placed his daughter in the seat and secured the belt before undoing the buttons on his suit jacket and sitting down. Then Shawn opened up the diaper bag and retrieved a bib, some rice puffs, and a bottle of water, which he poured into her sippy cup.
"Mmmm!" Piper hummed as she wiggled her little hands in anticipation.
"You're hungry, aren't you? I've got some baby food if this isn't enough." He'd made sure he was overly prepared for their trip.
As she fed herself from a plastic bowl, he looked around the room. He recognized several of Taryn's employees working behind the bar and carrying trays of food. Some of Tricia's staff were among the guests, but he suspected no one would try to strike up a conversation with him since their loyalties were with Taryn. After a bit, Tom and EJ spotted him and walked over.
"Nice to see you, Shawn," EJ said as they shook hands.
"I'm so sorry for your loss," he told them both. "Your dad was an amazing man."
"Thank you. It's been a horrible week," Tom said. "Your daughter is adorable. Is your wife here?"
"Yasmin is working in Paris, but she sends her condolences."
Tom and EJ nodded, and a few seconds later Mariah joined them with a squirming toddler in her arms.
"Look, Gregor! It's another baby!" she said as she sat down next to Piper.
"Hi, Mariah. You did a beautiful job at the service," Shawn told her. "I loved what you said about love being eternal and how even after someone is gone, we can still feel their love inside us."
She smiled. "Thank you. I believe that the people we love become a part of our souls. This is totally off topic, but you don't happen to have another sippy cup, do you? Debbie left Gregor's at the church and all the cups here are glass."
He reached into the diaper bag and pulled one out. "Here you go. If he wants some snacks, I've got enough for a dozen babies."
"You are a lifesaver!"
EJ and Tom excused themselves to get some food, and Mariah and Shawn chatted for a bit about their babies' development until his family came over.
Mariah stood up after warmly greeting them. "I need to talk to the other guests, but it was nice catching up with you."
"Stop back if Gregor needs anything," he told her before she left.
"I'm going to go get us some drinks," Manny said and Jordan offered to help.
Once they were gone, Aaliyah sat down and leaned towards her brother. "I know it's hard, but you should go talk to Patricia and Taryn."
"Tricia asked if you were here," his mum added. "I guess they didn't see you come in. She's so glad you came to the service."
"I'll do that now. Can you two watch Piper?" He didn't want to upset Taryn by introducing her to his baby after everything they'd been through.
"Of course," Karen said.
He left his daughter with his mum and sister and walked in the direction of the memorial photo display, though he was waylaid by Mina, the manager at Ford's, for several minutes. They were then joined by Reagan, Rob, and Jackie who seemed genuinely happy to see him, so perhaps they didn't hold anything against him after all.
Meanwhile, Taryn was looking around the packed room, hoping to catch Julian's eye. She really needed a glass of water but was reluctant to leave her mom alone. His back was to her and he was engaged in conversation with Earl's sons. She didn't want to bother the waitstaff, so she turned to her mom. "I'm going to get a drink. Would you like that tea now?"
"Yes, please! I'm parched!"
Taryn stepped away and went behind the bar to get the drinks herself. As she waited for the tea to steep, she noticed that the gathering was going well. People were eating and drinking as they talked, and the overall vibe was positive instead of somber. The music playing over the speakers was a bit loud, so she turned it down a notch before picking up the drinks and returning to Tricia.
As she approached her mom, she saw that Shawn was with her. He looked ridiculously handsome in a black tailored suit, and she hated herself for noticing this fact. His hair was shorter than it had been in the photos she'd seen recently, but it was perfectly coiffed so that his curls looked both tousled and styled at the same time.
"Here's Taryn now," Tricia said. "I'm going to go check on the kitchen and let you two catch up."
"But your tea!" Taryn blurted, caught off guard by the idea of being left alone with her ex.
"Just set it on the table. I'll be back in a few." And then Tricia vanished into the crowd.
Taryn put the mug down and looked up at Shawn. His caramel eyes were red-rimmed, and she fought urge to hug him so that they could comfort each other. "Thank you for coming."
He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Thank you for passing along the information so that I could be here. I'm, uh, sure that wasn't easy."
She looked at the photos, which included one of Shawn, Tricia, and Earl at their wedding. "He was your family, too."
"I miss him. We drifted apart after I moved, but now that he's gone, I feel this emptiness."
"He was one of a kind. It hasn't completely sunk in that I'll never hear him laugh again. His laughter was the best."
Shawn smiled. "God, yes. He could singlehandedly make the whole room the happiest place on earth. Your mom seems to be doing pretty well, all things considered. Are you okay?"
"You know my mom...she's always strong for everyone else. I think we'll all struggle as we come to terms with the fact that he's gone forever. I'm just doing my best to support her."
"You're strong, too." He wanted to reach out and touch her so badly that he had to shove his hands in his pocket to prevent himself from doing so.
"We both know that's not always true," she said softly.
They stood in silence for a few long moments. Shawn kept trying to read her face to figure out how she felt about his presence, but every time he looked at her, he got lost in her blue eyes.
Finally, Taryn spoke. "How are you? Are you enjoying living in California?"
"I'm good. My label is doing well and I'm working on new music. The climate in Montecito is like heaven, though the lack of true seasons is hard for me to adjust to."
It was not lost on her that he'd failed to mention his wife and baby, and she needed to show him that she was strong enough to handle discussing those parts of his life. "I'm sorry that Yasmin couldn't be here. Aaliyah said she's doing Paris Fashion Week. That's impressive!"
"She asked me to tell you that she's very sorry about your loss."
This wasn't exactly the truth. Yasmin had been outraged when he told her he was flying with the baby to Canada. She felt it was too risky without a bodyguard, but he didn't have time to line one up. She also told him that Piper would be miserable and cranky, though so far she'd been delightful. If she got fussy later, they'd just go home to Pickering. Yaz was sympathetic about Earl's passing, but she felt Shawn's huge donation was a sufficient expression of condolences.
Taryn was about to ask about Piper when Jules joined them. He put one arm around her and extended the other to Shawn. "Hello. I'm Julian," he said confidently.
"Nice to meet you. I'm Shawn," he replied as they clasped hands.
"I know who you are," Jules chuckled. "Thank you for coming today. Can I get you something from the bar?"
It was crystal clear to Shawn that Taryn's fiancé was establishing that he was one of the hosts of this event, and therefore part of the inner circle of family. "I think my dad got me a beer, and I should probably go drink it before it gets too warm."
Taryn was relieved that she wouldn't be part of this awkward triangle for much longer. "It was nice to see you again."
"It's been too long," he said before giving both of them a weak smile, and as he walked back to the table, he felt hollow.
Jules pulled Taryn against him. "Was that horrible for you?"
"No. It was uncomfortable, but not miserable."
"I bet he'll leave pretty soon. It was probably hard for him to come, given everything that's happened, and I respect that he was willing to put himself through it out of his fondness for Earl."
"I'm going to go to the bathroom," she told Jules. "I've had to pee for the last hour."
On her way to the restrooms, she was momentarily distracted by watching Shawn as he sat down next to his baby. He kissed her on the top of her head with such tenderness that her heart lurched in her chest. Once she got to a stall and locked the door, the tears started falling.