Jade's POV
"Starting school tomorrow. Senior year. Woo," I fake cheered taking a sip of beer, the cold liquid gliding down my throat distracted me momentarily. "Best years of my life my ass," I scoffed staring at the grave as if it was going to speak back to me.
"Everyone's going to be talking about you. I love you Chantelle, I really do. But I do not want to be talking about you twenty-four/seven. In fact I'd like to avoid all conversation about you unless I'm talking to you."
"How am I going to survive without you?" My voice cracked but I refused to be weak in this moment so I swallowed the lump in my throat, wiping underneath my eyes to catch the tears that fell before I could hold them in.
I drank more of my beer, avoiding making eye contact with her grave. When I looked at her grave it was like I was looking at her, well the closest thing I could get to her. Although even when I wasn't looking at her grave it was like I could still feel her presence. Almost like she was still here.
I shook my head at my crazy thoughts. I truly was loosing it.
"Enough talking to you for today or else I really am going to go mental. I'll force Justin to come with me next time, how about that? He wants to come he's just a little...scared. He doesn't want to face the truth," I explained, picking at the grass beneath me.
"I don't think anyone wants to. But you're my best friend. I have to come here everyday because what else would I do. We both know I have no life without you. God you've only been gone a month and my life's been flipped upside down," I chuckled morbidly, sighing when no one replied back to me.
The trees had started to sway violently, clouds merging into a grey mass and the temperature dropped as whispers of cold slid across my skin; all a hint it was going to rain soon. "Remember don't drink and drive," I let out a little chuckle as I lifted my arm into the air, showcasing my sling.
"A little too late for that I guess. Love you Chantelle." I stood up, wiping off my jeans although I didn't care too much about the state of them. I ran my fingers over the engraved calligraphy, 'your song ended but your melody still lingers'.
"I miss you C." I brought my index and middle fingers up to my lips before pressing them onto the headstone.
Sighing I walked out the graveyard, picking my options for where I could go. I wasn't particularly in the mood to go home right now, I would only be faced with pitiful glances.
I walked to the closest shop to me, which happened to be my local corner shop. I put my hood over me, wishing it would swallow me whole so I wouldn't have to face my shopkeeper. Where I was from everyone knew everyone. Which means everyone knew about Chantelle's death.
I strolled through the aisles acting as if I wasn't here for one thing. Finally walking up to the shopkeeper, I alerted him of my presence, "Hey Abdi. Just a bottle of Tito's."
"You're nowhere near twenty-one Jade." He was looking at me like I was a kicked puppy and it was getting on my last nerve. My patience had begun to run thin nowadays. Guess I've got no one to balance me out like I used to.
"Goddammit Abdi!" I slammed my hand on the counter. "I need one thing and one thing now. I don't remember looking for your opinion. Now are you going to give me it or do I need to go somewhere else?" I tensed up once I realized the little outburst I just had. I crossed my arms in disdain, refusing to admit defeat even if I did just embarrass myself.
"Are you sure you should be drinking?" He asked softly only agitating me more. Why was he being so nice? Why was everyone so nice?
"Please," I sighed, my despair seeping through.
"That'll be twenty dollars."
I slapped the money into his hands, gingerly picking up the bottle of alcohol that was coddled in a brown bag. Finding the closest brick wall that wasn't surrounded by houses was difficult but I finally found one. I climbed up it, with much difficulty thanks to my sling, cracking open the bottle.
I guzzled down that alcohol as I looked into the distance. It was just trees, nothing special, but it calmed me. I was alone with my thoughts but they didn't rage through me like usual, merely whisking by me.
Truth was I had done this multiple times, even before Chantelle died. The only difference was I knew she wouldn't pick up the phone, wouldn't scold me for drinking so irresponsibly before getting over it and just talking to me. I would kill to talk to her one more time. Nothing extravagant, just simply talking.
"Why did you have to leave C?" I asked into the night sky, now laying on the wall.
"I don't think the sky's going to speak back," a voice brought me out of my thoughts. I looked around trying to locate the amused voice.
"Huh?"
"Down here."
I looked down, holding the edge of the wall so I didn't fall off. A figure stepped out the shadows and I could just vaguely make out their silhouette. From my knowledge it seemed to be a male, holding a cigarette, but I couldn't be to sure as there wasn't any street lights around, the only lighting provided was from the stars and the moon.
"Got a light?"
"Go away."
"Not here to intrude. I just need a light and then I'll leave. You can carry on talking to the sky don't worry."
"Fine," I grumbled, lifting my hips so I could access my back pocket. I pulled out my lighter bending down as we met in the middle. I lit his cigarette, not even bothering to look at his face. Once the smell filled my senses I quickly realized it wasn't a cig.
"Seriously man. You're smoking weed and you don't even have your own lighter?"
"Maybe I was just hoping to speak to a pretty lady." I slumped back onto the wall as he spoke. I don't know why I asked a question. Asking a question ignites a conversation and I certainly wasn't in the mood for a chat.
"You can't even see me. Here take this, I'm sure you'll need it more than me. Now leave." I threw my lighter down to him knowing he may have to relight his joint a few times.
"Really?"
"Yup. Scrooge is in a giving mood."
"Thanks..." He said, clearly waiting for my name.
"Jade."
"Jade. Thanks Jade."
"Don't wear it out. Now scurry off." He turned around, whistling a tune as he did before I stopped him, "Stranger!"
"Yes Jade?"
"Give me a pull before you go."
"What?! No."
"See it as compensation for giving you my lighter."
"Fine," he grumbled, walking back with less pep in his step than before. I wrapped my lips around the joint, appreciating the smoke that filled my lungs.
"So what's your name? I've given you my name, my lighter and I've smoked with you. Feels like we're pretty close."
"Yeah...no."
"Really? You're not gonna give me your name?"
"Nope. You'll just have to guess." He snatched the joint from me and walked away, fading into the darkness.
"Just me and you C," I sighed, staring up at the stars. I never knew what happened to dead people but I had never had a reason to care. I never knew if death was the ending, or whether a piece of you still lingered here on earth.
Regardless of whether her soul was still in this universe she had left her mark. She left her imprint on the people she loved. She taught me everything there was to know about friendship, about love, about life. I know I'd never forget her and that's how I knew she left her mark.
With that being said I still prayed that there was a heaven. A heaven where Chantelle was because that girl was truly an angel. So I looked up at the stars in confidence, hoping we were looking at each other because hope was all I had left.