My Path To Serenity

Chapter twenty

ATTENTION: THE POINT OF VIEWS SHIFT FROM TRISTIAN'S PERSPECTIVE, TO JASPER'S. I THINK ITS IMPORTANT TO SHIFT POINT OF VIEWS EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE TO GET INSIGHT FROM MORE THAN JUST ONE CHARACTER. WHAT YOU'LL BE READING FIRST IS TRISTAN'S POINT OF VIEW IN THE FIRST PARAGRAPH.

I gathered around everybody in the therapy room with Staff Tracey and the rest of the group. I sat on the nearest couch, while staff Tracey sat in a tall, wooden, chair in front of all of us, with her clipboard on her lap of course. "Let's welcome our new friend, Tristian." Everyone clapped for me, and I just awkwardly sat there with this fake smile on my face. Yay! Congratulations, Tristian! You made it to rehab! Yeah, right. Psh. "Let's have you start first," she genuinely smiled. "If you want to pass, that's fine for now. It's just important to give everyone a turn, so be mindful of that." "Pass," I immediately answered. "Oh come on," Alex nudged me. "Share something." "If he doesn't want to share, you need to respect that," Staff Tracey spoke up. "You'll come around eventually," she grinned. "How are we supposed to open up around him, if he can't open up around us?" Alex groaned. Inside I was aggravated, but I kept a poker face. "Oh please," David intervened. "Don't be ridiculous." I sat up straight and crossed my arms. "Nah, he's got a point," I admitted. I looked at Staff Tracey and she frantically looked around at all of us, confused what was going to be said next. I didn't necessarily want to speak up because I knew it'd piss off Alex if I didn't, but that I figured if I wanted the respect I deserved, I should open up at least a little. "My story might be a little different from all of yours, but bare with me anyways. My name is Tristian Peters," I began. "I'm seventeen years old, and I was put in here to avoid jail." Everyone was quiet, with their ears open and eyes fixed on me. It was a little nerve wracking, but I opened up as much as I wanted to tonight anyway. "I have a girlfriend at home who loves me, but I kind of pissed her off when she came to visit me today." I heard a few faint laughs from the group, but I didn't bother to confront them. "I have a two year old son Oliver, and a daughter on the way. However, my girlfriend thinks it's best for us to give her up for adoption." "Is that what you think is best?" David curiously spoke up. "At first I did. Maybe now I still do. It's just, she showed me the ultra sound picture today and everything got real." My eyes widened, "as I looked at the photograph of my daughter, it's like wow this is serious. I mean I knew it was serious from the very beginning, but it's hard to just give her away." Staff Tracey clicked her pen and jotted something down before she intervened. "Mr. Peters, are you having second thoughts about this adoption?" Am i? I wondered. Like really, am I actually having second thoughts right now? I thought I was sure of this, but today I'm unsure. "Maybe," I answered. "I mean no," I tried to convince myself. "No. I'm certain adoption is the best route to take. Best for the baby, anyway." I felt everyone's stares in the therapy session, but I just stared at the floor. I can't believe I'm really talking about this right now. "Remember it's okay to feel your feelings, Mr. Peters. Suppressing them for long periods of time could possibly lead to relapse," staff Tracey insisted. "I want today's topic to be all about emotions." She wrote the word in big letters on the dry erase board. I leaned my head back and rubbed my tired eyes, wanting to crawl back in bed and forget this conversation ever started. "Can anyone tell me what that word emotion means?" No one bothered to raise their hand. "Energy in motion," she wrote underneath it. I didn't expect this to be a science lesson. She turned her head towards me, "Maybe you could explain the emotions you're feeling right now?" I took in a deep breath and sighed. Exhausted. Bored. Lonely. Stressed. I slapped my hands at my sides. "Tired," I answered. "Me too," a guy from group related. "Also a little anxious, I suppose. I want to be at home with my girlfriend and my son. Not here... to be honest." Staff Tracey nodded, understanding. "I was supportive of this adoption decision at first because I knew it was best." I then caught the words at first, and corrected myself.  "I still think it's best, it's just.. I wish I was in the right place mentally and financially to provide for my little girl. And I'm not, so.. I don't know, there's that. That's all I have to say. Pass."

              JASPER'S PERSPECTIVE
Later on that night
"Hey honey," Allison shouted from the upstairs bathroom. "We're out of toothpaste." I finished loading my last dish in the dishwasher and sighed. It was getting late, and I was so looking forward to passing out early tonight. "Are you saying you want me to go to the store and pick some up?" I shouted from downstairs. "Yes, please!" She hollered back. As bad as I wanted to be in bed, I knew going to the store for Allison was the right thing to do. I smirked and grabbed the car keys off the counter and threw on my jacket. "If i give you ten dollars will you pick up diapers and wipes?" Charlotte asked from the living room couch, with Oliver asleep on her lap. I sighed and grabbed the ten dollars from her hand. "Sure, yeah. Anything else?" "Milk and bread!" Allison answered as she came down the stairs. "Goodness, you're sending me out on a shopping spree. Why didn't we think about this on the way home from Meadow Falls?" No one said anything. I kissed her cheek, "I'll be back in twenty." Pumpkin ran up to me and licked my hand. I glanced over at his food bowl and noticed it was empty. Ugh. We need dog food, too. "Make that thirty." I pulled in to Quick Mart and pulled out the crinkled list from my jean pocket, then mentally tallied up how much I'll be spending. I knew better than to leave my wallet in the car this time, so I stuffed it in my pocket and grabbed a grocery cart. The grocery store seemed a little dead tonight, which was perfect. I didn't like shoving my way through a crowd of people for eggs, or watching people fight over the last tub of ice cream. I scanned up and down the aisles for the first thing on my list. Cinnamon and mint toothpaste. The cinnamon flavored tooth paste was for Allison, while mint was for me. Who doesn't like mint? She doesn't. While slowly walking my cart down the aisle, I had my head turned to examine all of the brands of tooth paste in front of me. There were so many different brands, ranging from cheap to outrageously expensive. The bubblegum flavored tooth paste on the shelf reminded me of my childhood- my childhood before I was aware of the fact my parents are in fact my second parents, because I've been adopted. I must've been so focused on which brand to choose in that moment, that my cart bumped into a man with a backpack on his back, leaving his groceries in his hand spill all over the ground. "I am so sorry man," I apologized as I bent down to help pick up his things. "I didn't see you." He nervously laughed it off as he swooped up everything he could fit his hands, but I watched a couple things fall out of his unzipped book bag. Everything that fell, had price tags. I looked up at him and he looked at me with a funny look on his face. The closer I looked, the more I noticed his piercing blue eyes and bleach blonde hair, with tattoos covering his entire body. "You look familiar," I put my finger on my chin. "Do I?" He asked as he adjusted the bag on his shoulders. I knew he looked familiar, but I couldn't pin point where I seen him from. "Yeah, what's your name? Sorry, I know that's a little weird it's just gonna bug me all day if I can't remember where I've seen your face before." Before he could say anything, my hands flew over my mouth in shock.
This was the same asshole that ripped off my car, and I couldn't believe I was standing three feet apart in aisle two from him. "Never mind, I know exactly where I know you from." He cocked his head in confusion and gave an awkward smile. "Yeah?" "Yeah," I said firm as I looked him dead in the eyes. An older employee, had to of been about mid sixties or seventies, walked passed us to stock one of shelves next to us. I was considering telling this lady. "You might not know me, but I sure as hell know you." The guy backed away a little, and I turned my head towards the employee, but also making sure to keep an eye on this guy who was stealing. "Excuse me ma'am, this punk just stole from your store." The woman instantly glanced over and communicated something on her headset. From my assumption she was probably signaling for someone to call the cops. She ran over and asked for him to take off his book bag, but he refused. "You can't search me without suspicion," he jerked away. "I'm suspicious," the clerk angrily shot back. The manager rushed over and grabbed the man, hauling him into the security office. As I watched him get dragged away, I felt an overwhelming sense of relief that he isn't on the streets anymore. "Boy, I'm sure glad you caught you him," the clerk sighed in relief. "Me too, this isn't the only place he's stolen from." I finally picked up the mint and cinnamon tooth paste. I took a look at my grocery list and moved on to the diapers. I felt like such a hero in that moment. Not to toot my own horn, but I was proud! Allison and Charlotte won't believe I caught the guy who stole from the car at Sunrise Diner.