The Warden

Chapter 49

Don't tempt me. Charlan shrugged. "Very well."

Weaving her way out of the thorny vines, not a single one snagging her person, Charlan led them onto a winding game trail, recently used by a doe if her nose had not failed her. The curses died down to only one or two every few minutes when a hidden branch or unseen root made either the mage or general stumble or falter in the way.

Through it all Masis had remained entirely silent. The dark hid nothing from Charlan's eyes and unlike the occasional scowls and grimaces of the other men, his face stayed entirely neutral. From time to time, his eyes sought out Mistress Charlan, narrowed and scrutinizing. But for the most part his attention wandered about the forest. Not searching for anything, with no apparent focus, the pup let his gaze wander about as though lost.

Are you remembering home, Domrae? Charlan wondered. Are your parents and sisters hovering there just out of reach?

Her own child, Andsek, came floating up before her, a ghost from her memories, seemingly summoned by the forest's brooding force. Every detail crisp and exact, he seemed wreathed in the very smoke he had unraveled into. Eyes challenging, a trait he had learned almost as soon as he was born, mouth puckered as though tasting something sour, and arms crossed defiantly, he swam before her, an ethereal specter of thought, a wisp of recollection.

She had loved him once. That desire to please, guide, and protect had left an echo in her heart that had not quite faded. But so faint was it that it seemed illusory, like seeing someone you know out of the corner of your eye only to turn and find either a complete stranger or no one. She knew the words. She knew the motherly expectation that went along with them. But the sentiment had decayed and left only a fossil.

Hello, mother, said imaginary Andsek.

Charlan tilted her head, considering whether to reply or not.

Hello, son, she thought back, indulging the absurdity of talking to one's own mind.

How does it feel?

How does what feel?

Getting everything you want, of course.

Exactly how I hoped, she thought. She sought for the feelings or even her expectations, but found little to even grasp.

Tut, tut, said the now smiling Andsek. Lying to yourself will do you no good. Now, be honest. How do you feel?

Charlan frowned.

There was no satisfaction. No contentment. Not even peace. All of Haimlant and its lifelight nearly belonged to her and she could find nothing but hunger and unrest. She delved deep within her mental strata but didn't find so much as a nugget of the expected triumph. All that surfaced was hunger. That ever present, at times ignorable, hunger. A craving that did not originate from within her person but without. The tug from Manu, floating somewhere in the night sky, reminded her from whence it came.

Her frown deepened.

Fascinating, isn't it? asked the imaginary Andsek.

What is? Charlan growled back.

Oh, the fact that you don't even know where this plan of yours came from.

Don't be ridiculous. I created it. I executed it. I will reap its rewards. I did. Me. And no one else.

My, my, so touchy. The illusion shook its head. You probably would have told me that I knew what was true and was just fighting it. Well, that is when I was alive and a little boy. You lost most of your motherly affection over the last few centuries.

Now, you listen to me, Charlan screamed in her mind, I am the mother of all night wights. I struck the first deal with Manu. I DID! ME! I was once High Mage of all Haimlant, furthering the Waning, securing the mages position of power with the downfall of the Animal Kingdom and the Great Wolves. I mesmerized Lady Kyla's own son, the Warden. I did these things. Not you. Not Manu. Me! I rule the night and soon I'll rule all Haimlant, so get out of my head!

But is it really yours? the fading Andsek asked before sinking back into the unplumbed depths of her mind.

Panting, each breath shivering with strain, Charlan found herself alone in her mind, somehow still walking without falter through the cool summer air.

The Dealing struck with Manu had not been perfect. That had become abundantly clear almost immediately after the accord had been sealed. A nagging, persistent hunger had taken hold without delay. With the rising of Wilo, Charlan had quickly discovered the complete paralysis that persisted throughout the daylight hours. Her lifelight's absence had left a gaping hole she had not expected. Where once she could create and shape with a thought, now all she had was the night and a few parlor tricks.

Enough. Enough!

She halted. "Enough!"

Masis nearly ran into her. Master Elwith and General Biligrim's collision sounded out with a sharp intake of air.

"What is it?" asked Masis.

"What's the matter?" probed Master Elwith, feet stuttering in the underbrush.

"Why have we stopped?" asked General Biligrim, his air-bow clicking behind her.

Charlan stood there for a moment. She rested a hand on the rough bark of a tree before her, collecting herself. It took her a moment to recognize the numbing sensation in her toes that signaled Wilo's rising.

"Sunrise." Her fingers dug into the trunk. "We'll stop here. I'll rejoin you at sunset."

She fled the coming light.

*DON'T FORGET TO VOTE*