look at me ✧ chuuves

yves day

<yves>

i couldn't resist the girl who wears a big smile shaped like a heart. the one who makes an effort to have me be included and updated with anything she does, even though i try to ignore. a week has passed since the principal's office. the issue has finally died down and everybody seemed to have gotten back to their own lives.

chuu, who was sitting beside me, kept stealing glances at me. funny how she couldn't have known i noticed.

but it has always been the same. i couldn't understand how i was feeling towards her. something in me, a week ago, felt that it was weird.

being saved by jiwoo.

being liked by jiwoo.

it was guilt; and yet jiwoo's recent actions reminded me that it was not. that it was a very different feeling.

"you know i'm here if you need someone," same old words she repeated. it went on for a week.

although feeling reassured by those words would have made me better, i still could not pinpoint whatever's not unraveling in my head. it was frustrating. and i hate not being able to take hints.

"sooyoung, meet me at the tree later. i'll be heading out a bit earlier."

jiwoo not overstaying was a shocker, but it has occurred to me that she was just very concerned. and i appreciated that.

the class was soon dismissed and i watched her exit the door like a flip of a switch. wonder what's so urgent.

to the right of my vision, i saw jungeun and hyunjin waving at me. so, i grabbed my bag and greeted them, walking out of the room.

"jiwoo looked like she was in a hurry," hyunjin chuckled.

"ah, yeah," i made a small comment.

"ha. soo. young. you're still ignoring your precious chuu?," jungeun said as she crossed her arm and raised eyebrows.

"no!"

the two just sheepishly looked at me.

"okay maybe yeah..." i confessed. "i just need time to sort things out!"

hyunjin scoffed, "you've been sorting things out for a week now. if i were jiwoo, i'd be so devastated right now."

she is exaggerating. jiwoo would understand. guilt just kept kicking in, telling me that i'm taking her for granted.

but, can't you just avoid taking her for granted?

okay, conscience. i get what you mean. we wouldn't know what's going to happen.

when i get there, i guess i'll find out.

❖

apparently, jungeun and hyunjin accompanied me on the way to our tree. our, being mine and jiwoo's.

as we kept getting closer we could already hear jiwoo's squeaky voice. it sounded like she was in a panic. though, step after step, some music began sounding in our ears.

it was a guitar. the strumming was upbeat, starting with a minor chord. the three of us walked quicker to take a peek on the player.

"holy shit..." jungeun said under her breath.

there revealed a blonde girl, who seemed to be the worker at the cafe. i could see lia and her girlfriend clapping at the sides. there was also one woman with long brown hair who was holding a phone, videotaping everything.

then there's jiwoo. wearing that huge ass smile.

you attack my heart

you attack my heart

and all of a sudden, she was singing to me. and it was like a world where it was just us.

[insert: heart attack by chuu acoustic ver.]

i couldn't get to react. i became so speechless. my heart was pounding over a million beats. it felt faster than lightning. heat spread out my body. somehow, i got weak.

and i thought things would not get any crazier, not until jiwoo approached me with a bouquet of roses on her hands. 

"i can give you infinite time that you need. truth is, sooyoungie, nothing's stopping me from falling hard over you," i grabbed the flowers and looked at her once more. she gave me a smile, "i wanted to prepare something special to remind you that there are many happy days ahead. and we will give you those happy memories to replace the bad ones."

"happy birthday!!!" choi yerim exclaimed as she blasted jiwoo's front door.

"yerim, not yet! oh my fucking god," hyejoo aggressively pulled her back inside. before closing the door, she smiled at us, "continue. don't mind us."

jiwoo rolled her eyes and sighed.

"anyway, would you like to have dinner with us?"

i looked around. hyunjin already jogged towards the entrance. jungeun still dumbfounded while staring at blondie.

the brunette with the camera called to me, "come on, sooyoung! we brought our specials!"

yeji elbowed the girl.

"oh! silly me. my name is haseul! jo haseul! happy birthday and let's be friends!"

friends.

i had been wasting my time reliving all the bad memories i had without realizing that the girl right in front of me was my salvation. she gave me light and hope. and... she loves me.

there's nothing else in the world i'd rather be than here. it's finally time to move on and choose happiness.

"sooyoung, honey! the food's not going to eat themselves!," my dad called with my mom standing beside him.

"thank you, chuu."

"always, yves."