Commitment

Part 90

"Nothing's changed." She tugged her chin out of his sensual hold. What was he up to now? Touching her, caressing her as if he cared. She had nothing to offer him, financially or otherwise. He'd made his choice, a long time ago. Their chats during the last week were friendly. Amicable. Obviously better then the conversations they had when he worked here. But the telephone calls were not what she wanted. She pushed his shoulder and walked away.

"Things are different now." He said firmly.

"No." She mumbled before admitting, "Nothing has changed. I have debts. You have a job."

They reached the shed exit.

Gray reached for her shoulder, turned her around, and planted a hand on her shoulder, "We can reach an arrangement." He said calmly.

She snorted. "Really? Like what?" She asked in exasperation. The last thing she needed was to start caring for this man, not when she had been working so hard to shift him out of her heart.

He stated resolutely, sensing it was not going to be easy to get Regan to listen. "First, you listen." And when her eyes flashed at him, he decided to explain the business proposition he had for her. For by the looks of things she was not in the mood to deal with any thing other than facts at the moment.

He looked at her steadily, "You know, I have work related experience..."

"Good for you!" Her eyes feigning nonchalance.

" I have the skills..."

She again interrupted him, "You must have heaps of things to do at your new job. Use your skills there."

He banked his frustration. "Your know, my job comes with accommodation," He said flatly and his eyes caught and held hers. "it pays well and..

She interrupted, "Yes, I know." She folded her arms and glared.

Without batting an eyelid he said, "And I saved."

"Well done!" Sarcasm dripped from those two words. She had saved, it was part of her nature, but since she inherited this farm, her savings had vanished.

"I...."

She asked him incredulously, "You want to loan ..."

It was his time to interrupt, "No!"

"Oh."

Gray wasn't sure whether she was annoyed or upset.

"I said listen, Regan!" He looked at her trying to gauge whether she would do as he was ordering.

A few seconds later she said, "Fine."

Gray also thought it was best to check the options. She might prefer this to his actual plan. "You want me to loan you the money?"

"No." She told him with her best reprimanding voice.

Without any hesitation, he repeated his question, "Are you sure?"

She remonstrated, "Yes." She said without any discomfiture showing in her face, but inside she was embarrassed. "A debt is a debt, doesn't matter who is the creditor! Unless it is a loan shark!"

"If I loaned you the money, you could take your time to settle it."

The fact that he'd read her so well intrigued her no end. "I could have done that with the Jones family."

He smiled to soften the question, "Why didn't you?"

She recognized his determination so she opted for honesty. "Because I value my friendship with them."

His lips quirked with the hint of a smile, and tried to drive their discussion forward, "And does that reason apply to me?"

"Does it matter?" She squirmed.

She didn't get the answer she expected "Your answer is not good enough, Regan." He corrected and watched the heat bloom in her eyes. "You know what, you are good at deflecting probing questions. You automatically switch off."

"Well, you did tell me to listen! Nothing about answering anything." She snapped.

He poked his tongue into his cheek, and took a moment. This was not the right time to lose your temper, his brain reminded him.

"Why wouldn't you accept a loan? From your friends, the Jones or me."

She folded her arms, "Does it matter what my reasons are?"

"Fuck!" He mumbled. "Yes. Of course it matters."

Stalemate. They glared.

He exhaled slowly. "One reason. Just one bloody reason!" He growled softly.

"Money changes relationships!" She yelled.

Like health, death, he thought as he ran his hand through his hair. "Lots of things change relationships!"

"You asked me for one reason. I told you." She glared at him.

"No, you only made a statement, not a reason and with no explanation?" He jammed his hands into his pockets. This is bloody frustration, he thought while he watched her stubborn stance.

She huffed. "Money changes relationships, the power dynamics, the interactions, the attitudes, the, well everything. In the future there will be unexpected emergencies. Like Bob."

"Yes."

"It could have consequences, they could lose their job, like Bob, can't find new work. And they might actually need the money, fast." She looked at him, "What if you needed the money back?"

"I would ask if you could return it." He said bluntly.

She snorted. "You say that now, but at the actual time, you will find it hard to ask for it! I asked you about the groceries and you refused to tell me the cost!" She said quietly. "And I know if Lucy or Jenny or their parents lend me the money and if they needed the money back for whatever reasons, they would find it hard to request repayment." She rubbed at her temple to warn off a headache. " I would not want to place them in that position, it would become awkward. And I would not want to drag them into a difficult financial situation." She shook her head. "I would not risk our friendship."

He tipped his head to the side, "What about me? You don't consider me a friend, remember."

She straightened her shoulders, looked at him directly, "If I took money from you, it would come with strings!"

He blinked. "What? Are you kidding?"

"Yes. You could become resentful if you saw me spending cash on something else!"

He put his hands up, "Is this because I was stupid about you spending money on you..."

"Not exactly, but I am pretty sure, it would have strings for me and you, the creditor!"

"Fuck! Strings? What strings?"

"At some point, you might want input, because it is your money. A change in the power dynamic between us! As I said, money changes relationships in different ways." She sighed,  "Excuse me!" She turned around.