Music Heals All Wounds

Chapter 3

Essence

"You said the weekend, it's Tuesday. You were supposed to be here like two days ago." I fussed, while giving Eli a hug, not wanting to let go.

"I was supposed to catch a flight and get here Saturday night, but some shit came up. I'm here now though." He said, returning my hug.

My brother was so busy all the time, it's crazy. I damn near have to make an appointment just to see him. Since he lived in Atlanta and I lived in Louisiana, we didn't get to see each other as much as we would like to. This was actually my first time seeing him in person in six months.

"I got a bone to pick with you." Eli said, looking down at me with a serious look on his face. Damn. Straight to the point, just like that.

I let out a sigh, already knowing what he wanted to talk about. I motioned for him to follow me, I didn't want to have this conversation in the middle of the living room.

"Let's go out back."

He followed me through the kitchen and out the back door to the backyard. We walked over to the seating area and took a seat at the table.

"This is your first time being home in like, six months. You sure you wanna do this right now? I mean you just got here, you don't wanna get something to eat first?" I asked, trying to stall.

He looked at me unamused.

"Maybe take a shower, you're probably jet lagged." I continued.

"The flight was less than two hours." He countered. "Never mind that though, none of that shit is important."

Feeling defeated, I leaned back in my chair and prepared myself for the verbal whooping I was about to get.

"I'm really just trying to wrap my head around this whole thing. Like I'm glad you're out and everything, that's cool, but you shouldn't have been up in there in the first place."

"Things just got out of control and now Jeremiah's gone." My voice was low.

"Fuck that nigga. Why you didn't tell me he was putting his hands on you?" He said angrily.

"I didn't tell anybody, Elijah. I didn't know how to tell somebody or how to deal with it, I don't even know how it got that far. Besides, I shouldn't have done things that I knew would make him angry."

Blaming myself was something I battled with a lot, while Jeremiah was here and even now after he's gone. In our relationship, there were times where I could have prevented arguments. Instead, I initiated them. I shouldn't have questioned him about things that I knew would piss him off, maybe none of this would have happened and he would still be here.

"Do you hear yourself right now? Don't nobody give a fuck if that nigga was angry. He didn't have no business putting his hands on you." He said as he looked away from me, shaking his head in anger. "You should have told me. You know how this makes me feel, knowing you were going through this and I didn't do anything to protect you? That fucks me up."

There was a moment of silence between us. I didn't know what to say to make him feel better.

"Last time I was home, you had a small cut on your forehead that you said came from you hitting your head on the edge of your desk." He said as his eyes began to water. My head dropped in shame, knowing what he was alluding to. "That cut came from him?"