Chapter 9 - No secret

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Today was the day of their first concert on the "Unbreakable tour - the greatest hits tour". All the personnels were checking everything a last time before the show, cameras, lights and security around the stage. I walked around to help out as good as I could with what ever had to be done.

Even though the boys in Westlife didn't speak to me very much this day, I didn't speak to them either. And that was by choice. I was mad at Bryan for digging in my relationship. He could focus on his own life instead of caring about mine. He had given me the cold hand after I'd kissed him, and now he had opinions about who I was going to be with. It was like he didn't see me strong enough to handle my relationship myself. I had no reason to speak to him.

I was backstage. One in the crew had asked me to tape a loose cable. Westlife would enter the stage in ten minutes. They would make a really cool entrance. Just like I had proposed during our first meeting, when we planned the tour. The audience would believe they appears in black clothes, covering their faces. But that's just a set up. When that fake Westlife disappears, they will all five appear from the floor.

"Hey, Lauren!"

Westlife passed me and gave me a wave before they would get ready under the stage. I waved back before I bit off another bit of sticky tape.

"Lauren."

I turned my head around again and to my surprise, I saw Bryan.

"Aren't you supposed to get ready?"

"I know, I just have to speak to you-"

"Sorry, I really have to fix this and you have to prepare." I hadn't changed my mind. I was still mad at him.

"No, you listen!"

Rolling my eyes I turned around one more time to listen.

"I see why you've ignored me today. I understand you perfectly." He started. "You're pissed because I made you realise what an asshole your boyfriend is."

I stood up in front of him to look into his eyes. "I'm mad because you're digging in my relationship and it's not your business, that's why. You don't think I'm strong enough to handle him myself, do you?"

"It's not about that, you know that. You don't love him. You're blind if you can't see it."

"Why have this discussion now? You're in a hurry! Five minutes, go! Now!" I pushed him away from me. I could hear people calling after him.

"Because it's no secret that you like me."

"You're confidence seems to be on top today, Mr. McFadden." I said, not taking my gaze from the cable.

"Stop denying it, I just told you it's no secret."

"Still don't get the point of your little sermon. Why don't you jus-"

"I like you too. Or I like you very much." Nervousness filled his gaze. "That's the point of my little sermon."

It was like his confession broke all the walls inside of me. The walls I had built up to protect myself from my own feelings. Being mad at him had been my way of protecting myself from getting hurt, or getting any further feelings for him, since I thought they would never be responded. I almost felt to cry out my relief.

That moment seemed perfect, until a, to me forgotten, but important fact crossed my mind. I prevented an impulse of embracing him and instead looked at him. I couldn't get all the pieces together.

"Aren't you married? And have children?"

(Video: Unbreakable tour 2003 in Manchester)

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