My Military/P.D Big brother (Jay Halstead X One Chicago)

Chapter 21

Dylan's POV

I heard, this cracked, broken, tired voice of jay saying, "I need help" and it so nearly broke me...

Phone call:

Dylan: well Chicago, I am here, and we will talk as soon as my shift is over tomorrow morning, I know its not easy for you to ask for help....

Jay's reply: Oh Texas, I don't know what happened....(jay started to cry)......This is so messed up, hell I nearly took out Adam!, I went for a nap on the couch in the breakroom and he walked in and startled me and the....next thing I knew I had him up against the wall, and then Kevin had to pull me off......this has gone to far....Texas.... I can't get it out of head....

Dylan: ok I hear you jay, just listen to my voice and listen to what I am gonna say, you are loved, you are cared for by so many people, your brother Will, asked me to check in with you for one and that girl of yours, Natalie she visited me this morning, as she knows you aren't in a good place and you need to talk to someone even if it's not her. I care for you too, you are my big brother and that relationship means a lot to me and we have both gotten each other through rough times....

Jay that is never going to change, doesn't matter if I have boyfriend or you have a girlfriend, nothing gets in between us being their for each other, so Jay you want to talk before morning the door here at the firehouse is open or we can go get breakfast tomorrow morning.....

Jay: and you are my little sister Dylan and I should have called you before now, but I am to stubborn for my, own good right, well I mean you are the same in that way. But I don't want to get in your way, and you need sleep, to be able to do your job, I think I can last until morning....

I thought I could handle this on my own, I guess I am weaker than I thought, I hate how much this has affected my life...personal and work, I am so messed up Phoenix....I am also scared.... of what I have become.....

Dylan: Hey Chicago, not every fight needs to be fought solo – you told me that. Then on top of that you are not weak Jay, your walls cant withstand the storm that's hitting you and its perfectly ok to ask for help, and my hand / arm is always there to pull you out just as I know yours is there for me. Of course for us first responders, sleep is important but you know that I can function very well without it, haha but if that's how you feel, but if anything happens and your PTSD attacks tonight before then and now please phone me, I mean I still owe for that late visit?.....

Jay: yeah, you do still owe me for that, but I shall phone if there is a problem, and I am sorry for this...and for everything... that's about to come your way... and maybe your right that my walls are just shaking as of the storm that's brewing up inside of me.... Thank you T, I am feeling a little better than I had been.

Dylan: oh Jay it's fine, no problem and its nothing I can't handle and plus it shouldn't affect me as I got myself under control, and hearing the stories from Marshall haven't seemed to set me off yet, but anyways as long as your ok right now, I well leave you get back to work, but I am a phone call away Chicago!... bye Jay..

Jay: yeah I know Texas, same back and damn he has been talking about his tour that's good to hear, I wish I could talk to Natalie about my stories and memories from that part of my life I just cant bring myself to tell her... but anyways I well let you go and stay safe out there Texas, I would hate it, if something happened to you...goodbye.

With that I hung up, and walked back into the common room, I was caught up in my thoughts and Kelly noticed, as then I heard him "hey Dylan are you ok?" and I looked at him and replied "oh yeah, I am ok, it's Jay who is not ok, and I just spoke to him, I can't believe I didn't notice how bad he was until now, I guess I have been so caught up in work and Marshall, that I haven't checked in with him and I knew this event he was involved in was going to screw him up! I wish I checked in before now.... I feel like I am a bad sister / friend for not being there for him."

Then I heard Herman say "hey kiddo, don't take it out on yourself you are now here for him, and you being caught up with Marshall is ok I mean he is your boyfriend, and wasn't this the other way around a few months ago when Jay had started dating Natalie, he had been caught up with that relationship that he hadn't checked in with you." And I nodded and said, "yea you are right Herman, but I feel for him, It sucks when PTSD overtakes your life, and you cant sleep or think straight!"

Then Kelly "hey you are a, amazing friend, don't ever doubt that and you have been helping Marshall settle in to being home and not in the line of danger, plus I know for Jay it is hard for him to ask for help and I am guessing he cant speak to Will or Natalie yet about his past experiences... but he has you and you have us to talk to if its get to much for you to handle and I know for a fact you are the same and you feel like Jay is the only one who can understand your PTSD or history."

All I said, "thank you, Herman and Severide for that, that was exactly what I needed to hear right now." Then everyone went back to their conversations and, I just stood by the counter in the kitchen and looked around and I saw how much love was in there for everyone in the room, I knew what was coming tomorrow at 7am... giving my shoulder to another solider, a brother in uniform, a fellow first responder, and to someone I love and care for.....yeah I am not going to let Jay Halstead drown any farther than he is already... I should check in with Adam, just to make sure he is good.

Bells rang out: Engine 51, truck 81, Squad 3, and Ambo 61 – fire at (address)........