My Military/P.D Big brother (Jay Halstead X One Chicago)

Chapter 23

Jay's POV

Still driving home I was thinking over what Dylan had said, as I stopped outside my house and I sat there for while thinking over about what just happened. Eventually I got out walked to my front door unlocked it and walk in to find it empty as Natalie was still at work and Owen was out with the nanny.

So I went to go and clean myself up, so ended up jumping into the shower, thoughts kept running through my head, about how if this were the other way round would I tell Dylan to walk away.

Eventually got out of the shower and went to get changed, that's when I heard my phone go, so I walked over and saw that mouse was calling me....

I have a feeling he is about to chew my ear off for how I left Dylan's place.

Phone call:

Mouse: hey man, how are you? I have heard what's going on, and buddy I am so sorry to hear about Logan, I know you two were close, but this was not your fault! As I know how you think, and I know that is how your thinking right now and yes Jay I know about how you left things with our little sister! And I am not happy with you! For fuck sake jay she is just looking out for your welfare!

Jay: damn mouse, you know me well, but it was my plan, and somehow it failed, and I lost a friend, a teammate and a work collogue. I just can't find the answer to why this happened...

I know she is looking out for me and my welfare, but you know me I am a bit of hot head and I care too much to let this case just go, and I feeling like I need to be involved you know?

Mouse: I know Jay, you are struggling to rap your head around how this ended up so badly, but man I know this is hurting you mentally and physically, you need to take care of yourself alright?

I know you want to finish this, and get the answers you have been looking for and to answer why did it have to be Logan? but Jay I know this might be what you want to hear but have you thought about stepping back from this case, look I know I can't stop you from working the rest of the case but It's just a suggestion.

Jay: wow, you too huh? With the whole you should walk away from the case and let me tell you something! I am not stepping back from this and no I am walking away as I am going to finish this for Logan!

Mouse: well man I get it, just don't burn all your bridges alright? Look you do what you do best but If you go down this path there is no turning back and if you do something you will regret then it will haunt you for the rest of life! Jay and I don't want that pain to hurt you or be constantly on your conscious, I know it's happened before and the way you are built jay is that you put your heart into everything and work with your heart first!

Jay: mouse I have to ask you something? would I tell Dylan to walk away if this was flipped and she was in my shoes, cause that question keeping spinning around my head!? And now I keep thinking maybe she is right and maybe I would say to walk away but I just don't know?

Mouse: well Jay, I think you would tell her what she did tell you, because you two are built in the same way, and you hurt in the same way, and the fact you cant trust yourself and you don't know who you are right now, then yes she is 100% right saying what she said to you.

I am saying the same thing, you should step back before you put yourself in danger or you end up doing something you will regret! but i hope you know that we both won't give up on you Jay you are family to the both of us!

I was thinking about what to say to him, and I cant find the right words! So I just hang up on him.....

ahh god! fuck I can't think straight anymore, who am I right now?....