Baking and drawing is all (M/N) likes to do to avoid his problems. He took to the seas to draw the beautiful scenery and to eat all types of food. His unique ability makes him scared to get closed to people since they could use him but that changes...
Walking out, I looked around before wandering outside where Mihawk was training Zoro. Mihawk encouraged me to rest since I was still injured but I wanted to watch and learn so I did at a safe distance with Perona. My eyes studied Mihawk and with the book Perona gave me, I began writing notes from how the blade would be held to how Mihawk would skillfully turn his arm to jut his sword out. I would do little sketches on the side as examples so I could refer to it at a later date. I wanted to get better soon and protect everyone.
My recovery was quite fast but my scar to my side was still very red. The one on my stomach had faded a lot but was still there although it was hard to notice. Now four weeks have passed, I was well enough to train and it was very hard. Mihawk was relentless in his teachings. He took on a different approach for teaching me. He would spar with me more unlike Zoro who would get lectured usually. Mihawk was rather hands on with me and noticed that my weakness in strength was my biggest strength. He made me become impossibly faster than I was before.
Before I knew it, night had come. Zoro had probably found his room with Perona's help and they were both off to bed. Right now, I was baking by myself since there wasn't much else to do to keep my mind at bay. The light footsteps alerted me that it was Mihawk so I didn't freak out. He grabbed himself a glass of wine before observing me mix the ingredients. Jokingly, I offered him to join in before continuing to whisk. I closed my eyes enjoying the peaceful nature of this castle. Mihawk's presence could be sensed next to me so I took that as indication he accepted my offer to join. I began telling him instructions which he took seriously as he began helping me with the amount of flour he needed to pour.
"You seem much happier when you bake." Mihawk commented
"I am, it's easy to forget about the bad things when I do something I like"
"I'm rather surprised you still aren't suffering any repercussions from the war. You're well composed." Mihawk remarked.
"I try to be composed but they haven't gone away. I'm a train wreck inside" I informed laughing lightly at the end.
Quietly, I went back to mixing the ingredients in the bowl before switching on the ovens and buttering the pans with some flour sprinkled in so the cakes would release easier. It was nice to have someone I trusted next to me as I got lost in the repetitive actions. It hides the painful thoughts from coming up. Mihawk handed me the flour and I mixed it into the dough, folding it gently. The cake was done so I poured it into the pan while Mihawk went to get some red wine. After knocking the pan, I put the cake into the oven. I could tell even Mihawk was getting tired but I was restless as I waited for the cake.
Soon, it was done and by then Mihawk had left the kitchen to the library I presume. I didn't bother checking. I pulled the sweet delight out of the oven. The sweet aroma reminded me of the sweets I gave to Whitebeard when I first met him. Those memories brought up memories of Ace's bright smile and fond memories of how he would fall asleep while eating. My hands quickly shoved the cake onto the counter as I left the oven open when I switched it off with my trembling hands. My mind couldn't let go of my fond memories with those two.
I crumpled over the counter as the tears began piling up before I crumpled onto the floor with my trembling hands pulling harshly on my hair to snap out of it. Memories of the war was playing like in my mind endlessly as it got slower to Ace's death. If only I had been faster then maybe he would be alive. I felt like an utter failure as my glazed eyes stared at the floor with my visibly shaking body unable to control itself. My breathing hitched and I felt like I was suffocating.
My chest felt like it would collapse on me and my vision was hazy. My tears were spilling out. I was gasping for air, my hands clawing at my throat as if that would let me breathe. The negativity clouding my mind didn't let me think so I was very irrational. I felt like I was suffocating for hours. During my state, I panicked and hit my head while lashing out at whoever touched my shoulder but that was enough to bring me back. My head was pounding in pain as I saw Mihawk crouched on one knee in front of me. His gaze further snapping me out of the weird state I was in. Extending my hands, I apologized and wiped away my tears.
"Don't worry. You're still here."
"Thanks..."
"Here."
Mihawk offered a handkerchief to me that I thanked him for before using that to wipe away my tears. Mihawk didn't physically offer much comfort but his warm presence and kind gesture was enough for me. I apologized a lot but Mihawk reassured me that it was fine. I laughed a little and joked about how silly I looked while Mihawk put the cake away. I walked back to my room before Mihawk followed me with a cup of Camomile tea. I thanked him as he left the room. I cried in my sleep that night.
A/N: I imagine that even after a few weeks pass that (M/N) won't be able to move on and that since he tends to bottle everthing up that it just explodes in the form of a panic attack when his mind is not occupied. Fun fact, Mihawk was originally planned to hug (M/N) but I think during a panic attack, a hug would be the least helpful thing since it feels like someone is crushing you even further. Second fun fact, Mihawk will be stoic even when he falls in love. He hasn't fully yet. The last scene wasn't intended to be romantic but Mihawk just being nice. Thanks for reading!
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
