Chapter 22

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    I felt frozen in shock and fear. Part of me wanted to stand up and slap him but the other part wanted to jump up and kiss him. He held out his hand for mine. I could see him shaking and knew he must have been nervous so I took it. He helped me to my feet and leaned toward my ear. "Can we talk?" he asked. I shuddered when I felt his warmth and I nodded hesitantly, only accepting because I could feel him trembling with anxiety.

    He led me outside and began walking so I awkwardly followed in silence. He spoke first, breaking the silence as we approached his limo. "I have a lot to explain." he said, and then opened the door for me like he always used to. This time, he was forced to slide through the same door behind me. Silence followed as the limo began to move.

"Katy, please say something."

    I shifted in my seat uncomfortably. "What am I supposed to say, Dylan? Do you want me to tell you that everything is okay?" I didn't look at him when I spoke. I couldn't. "You don't understand. I... I had to do what I did." He ran a hand through his hair. The look on his face wasn't regret, but sadness, complete and honest sadness. Then, he grabbed my arm and cried into my shoulder.

    Instinctively, I tangled my fingers in his hair and kissed his neck. "Shh... shh baby, it's okay. It's okay, we'll figure this out." I whispered. Somehow something happened that made him feel like he didn't have a choice; I believed him. I actually did, even though I shouldn't have. Dylan led me into his hotel room and it was nice; it was open and lively with a comfy looking couch and a window that covered most of the wall. I almost wondered how he could afford it, until I realized that that the Teen Wolf actors probably all had nice rooms like these and MTV probably paid everything for them.

"Dylan?" I finally spoke.

"Yeah?" he asked, looking over at me.

"I missed you." is all I said.

"I've missed you as well, Katy. Can we sit down and talk?" was his response.

    I nodded, not even knowing how I got here in the first place. How did my life take such a dramatic twist? Nevertheless, we sat down on the couch facing each other. Neither of us spoke for a moment as I anticipated his excuse for breaking me. He seemed to be thinking about what he wanted to say.

"What did you mean by you had to do it?" I interrupted his thought.

"Scarlet. She... She threatened to do something to you if I didn't. Katy, she told me that if I didn't hurt you, she would make sure that you got hurt somehow. You know that I would have done anything for you, that's why I did it. I couldn't let you get hurt. I would rather die myself!"

"You can't be serious."

"It's true. I got so scared baby. I didn't want to do it, but you know that I would have done anything for you. Anything. I swear to god."

"Dylan–"

"Do you remember that night that I ran to your house in the rain?"

"Yes."

"I was scared that something would happen to you without me there. I wanted to stay with you all night to be sure. It was your safety over my happiness."

    I didn't say anything after I fell deep into my own thoughts. It made sense I guess, but why didn't he just tell me before? Why let us both suffer? He'd already answered that question though, and I knew it. He would have done anything to make sure I was safe, even if it meant that neither of us would be happy.

"So, what? Did you just think that I'd get over you or be happy or something?"

"Honestly? I did."

    I let out a bitter laugh and looked at the ceiling. He stood up then, and began pacing like he had on that night at the beach. I wanted to hit him, hit Scarlet, hit something. Everything just made me mad. All the suffering in those past few months, and for what? For me to not get hurt? I almost laughed at the thought. Just this morning, I was waking up on the bathroom floor and vomiting up a bottle of pills. I watched him put his head in his hands, obviously stressed; I watched his eyes and the way his body moved, his large hands and long fingers slid through his hair.

"You are an idiot if that's what you thought. You must have never understood how I felt about you, Dylan, if that's what you really thought."

"I just knew that I had to protect you. Scarlet, she... she's been unstable and obsessed with me for a long time, Katy. I thought she was better at first, but the messages started coming and I knew that she wasn't. I've seen what she's capable of and that's why. I couldn't let her hurt you, — I couldn't. I had no choice but to hurt you myself."

    I stared at Dylan and shook my head in disbelief. He must have been lying! If Scarlet was such a threat she would be locked up or jailed, institutionalized, something, anything. So many questions were twirling around my head at once that I couldn't find out which one to ask first. "Wh-why didn't you tell me? How could you just make love to me and then let me go? Did that not mean anything to you, Dylan? Because it sure as hell meant something to me." My voice sounded angry, but I didn't mean for it to. I was more hurt than angry, I was more confused.

"Of course it did. Katy, that night meant everything to me. Nothing hurt more than to have to let you go after..." he trailed off, making me look down.

"I... I don't know what you want me to say."

"Please, Katy, forgive me."

    I shut my eyes and sighed softly. "Damn it, Dylan." I leaned forward and put my face in my hands. How did he expect me to forgive him after all of that? Did he expect me to give him another chance if I did? I didn't think I could, it would have been too hard to be intimate with him and not think that he could leave at any moment. Nevertheless, my body willed me forward; I pressed my lips to his and I knew immediately that I had to forgive him. Our sparks were still there and they were just as hot and powerful as before.

    His hands pushed me back onto the couch and everything moved so fast because soon enough, I was in his bed and my shirt was being thrown across the room. Breathless, I broke the kiss and groaned as his lips ran down my neck. Why was everything moving so fast? "Can we slow down?" I breathed. His actions halted immediately as he lingered above me. "Sorry, I just... I've waited so long to be able to do this again." He exhaled and kissed me again, slowly. I shut my eyes as his lips brushed my neck for the second time. "Relax." he whispered into my ear. His long fingers inched up my waist and made me shiver.

"I love you Dylan."

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