I'm stuck with this taking notes thing. In a room full of my least favorite people. This is random, but did you know Switzerland has a bomb system implemented on Swiss national infrastructure, which would have been used to blow up bridges and such in case there was ever a Soviet invasion? Because I really wanted to fuckin explode right now. I couldn't even do anything on my phone. I had left in my hotel room because it was at 69% and I wanted it to stay that way.
"Alright, let me start reading the first one." Germany announced. "Let's see...'Sometimes I wonder if I could be as happy and carefree as Veneziano if I could finally find someone who would love me like everyone loves him...signed, Romano.' Wait, isn't this from Pintere-" He was interrupted by loud sobbing before he could finish. "Oh brother I'm so sorry! I've never noticed! Also, don't you think it's because of your bitchy attitude? Can you answer me that, big brother? Wouldn't people feel like holding up a conversation with you if you didn't curse them out in the first few seconds of the said conversation?"
Spain, who had also trotted over at the mention of Romano, wore a ginormous grin on his face that could rival Russia's. "I'm so sorry Romano, I should have paid more attention to you, even though your literal childhood was spent with me, and you threw tantrums for the majority for it." Seborga, who was pushed aside even though he was one of the Italy brothers, shook with visible frustration.
Romano flushed a bright banana red, and cursed, "Damn ass bastards can't respect your fucking privacy I swear to Dio I will beat you both to a goddamn stain on the sidewalk bitches really can't stay out my pants ffs I really fucking hate you both, you know?" Actually, I don't think I should put down the rest of that.
England coughed, took the book, and flipped the page. "I'll read from here. 'Wow no one notices me.' Signed, uhhhh...who?" No one noticed the person getting sat on by Russia. Actually, who was that? How did he get in here?
England sighed. "Oh well. Next entry I guess. 'Sometimes I doubt Holy Rome really is coming back. I know he promised to come back...but still, I just feel like those last words were an empty promise. Signed, Italy." Germany, who looked a lot like Holy Rome, had historical ties to Holy Rome, acted like an adult version of Holy Rome, and was a good close friend buddy to Italy, refused to look Veneziano in the eye. "Wow would you look at the time. I need to go fuck my dogs now. Haha goodbye." He turned on his heel and walked out the door to leave because the author is unoriginal as shit and needs to continue the plot, even though we were supposed to be stuck in here until the diary collection was finished. Oh well.
Romano hugged his brother fiercely and said, "That bitch ass potato bastard doesn't deserve you. I'm going to beat him up later." North Italy sniffled and whimpered, "Yeah lmao ok." Hungary snatched the goods out of England's hands, probably horny for more fanfiction fuel. "'The locals set me on fire again...but this time, they tied me up so I could not move. My whole body is sore and my hair is shorter. After they realized I could not die from fire, they tossed me into the lake. I cannot swim...and I cannot drown...I was just struggling there for hours, crying until Vati came. He looked so angry, and he called me stupid. All of this is happening because of my eye color — why did God curse me? What had I done?' Signed, the awesome Prussia." Hungary tensed up and turned to Prussia. "Prussia, how could keep this bottled up for so long? Also, I love you. That was random but no one will read this fic if there isn't a ship in it." She then snapped her head to Austria. "Hey, aren't you going to say anything? He's your brother. Don't you want in on a threesome?"
Austria said in his prissy Austrian voice, "What? No. Pianos are better at it. Also, I don't care." Hungary hit him with her frying pan. France snatched the book out of Hungary's grasp and continued to read. "Ohonhon, this one's from ma jolie baguette America. 'I had to raise all fifty states by myself, most of which were adopted and sold to me by other countries at a young age. Human trafficking, amirite? Suck my balls Eggland, China, and everyone that had to raise a child. Also, I have every mental illness known to man because for some reason in these type of fics this always happens to me. Feel bad and love me, everyone.'" Both France and England looked appalled, but for different reasons. "America...we're your family. How could you not tell us about this? We could have worked through it together. You know we're here for you." "Wait, it's possible to get all mental illnesses?"
