His mudblood

12) Slytherin common room

Ch. 12 Slytherin common room

Whenever I'm sad, or lonely. I find happiness in books. Because I can't think of a better way to leave the real world than going into another. But even though I was sad, because of him. I actually was reading the book he gave me. I hadn't been talking to him, I wasn't responding to his little notes that were taped inside my bag or books.

He probably didn't even know what was going on, but I just wished he didn't have to hide me from his friends. Everything would've been better if I was a pureblood and a Slytherin. But I was neither, so I was not right for him. And I knew it, but I didn't want to know.

"Put that book down and give me a kiss." I looked up and there he was, he was smirking and he was already moving my book to my lap. There was no one around because it was quite late and Madame Pince chased the first years out that were eating something.

It was not his fault that I wasn't good enough. So when he kissed me I kissed him back but I guess he was feeling something was wrong. Because he squinted his eyes and looked at me suspiciously, "Ava what's wrong?" He whispered it and then he looked behind him. To see if Madame Pince didn't hear him.

"Just tired," I said. I knew it was the worst excuse ever. And I knew it would only make him more suspicious.

"Yeah right, what's really up?"

I should've known he wouldn't buy it, because I wouldn't have either. Because no one ever does. "I'll tell you later."

I pushed him away without much force, I didn't want to hurt him or anything. But I did actually wanted to get away.

I wanted him to follow me and ask, I don't know why, I guess it's a girl thing. I guess that we walk away from our problems, pretending not wanting to talk about it, but actually wanting to talk about it. That's how messed up girls were.

I was glad he did, "you don't get to go without an explanation. Is it my fault?" He asked, "and don't tell me it's not me but it's you, because I'm not ready to break up with you."

"It's not that I don't like you," I said. He was right behind me and put his hand on my shoulder, I shuddered. I didn't turn around, and tried to walk on. But he held me back.

"If you won't stand still, look me in the eyes and talk to me, or I will make you."

"Okay, what do you want to know." I said, My voice was weak, I wasn't crying. But I sounded like I was about to cry any second.

"Why are you not replying to any of my notes."

The first question was already hard to answer. What was I supposed to say, because I don't think I'm good enough for you/ because I don't want you to hide your relationship.

"Please look at me," he said softly.

I turned around, "I haven't been replying because my feelings are all mixed up."

"Why?" He touched my arm and looked at me.

"Remember the first Apparition Lesson." He nodded, "remember when Crabbe asked you about why he had keep lookout with Goyle."

He nodded but as soon as he did, he looked shocked. "You heard that?"

"Yeah."

"How, where were you?" He asked.

"Next to Harry," I said.

"Seriously? I didn't even notice you, no offence of course." He was looking more shocked than ever, he was silent and I bet he was trying to recall what he had said.