Chapter 32: The Ascent

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I watched him, and I floated. He was a young man, and he lay on a darkish sofa in a dimly lit room. Around him there were hessian sacks for seats. He lay immobile, shirtless, wearing only baggy trousers that had once been white. I had a hunch that I had seen him before, yet somehow, he seemed alien. There were scars and bruises in his bare chest.

I was a small boy. I knew I had existed for a long time, perhaps far too long. I had lived in shadows and in dark corridors. I had watched from there. He never noticed me, like nobody did. If he ever became conscious of my presence, he turned nervous and left, or he expelled me with bright lights and much chatter. I only wished to talk. To be heard, for once. It was hard, though, since I had no words to tell. He was the one who was verbally witted. He lived his own life like I never existed. Senpai never noticed me.

Someone else entered the room and checked on him. Another young man, younger than the one asleep. Two others, too. They talked to each other. I knew they were talking about the youth lying on the sofa. One of them seemed worried; another assured him this was normal, there was no need to worry.

I lost my interest because it was lighter now, and I felt lighter. I felt like I had been chained for years, for millennia, but something that had chained me in the dark had vanished. For an eternity, I had cried alone in the dark, with an immobile wall of bricks closing me in, and nobody heard me. There, in the catacomb, lay my dried bones, and the treasure. And the treasure was guarded by a monster which sometimes appeared in the form of a great serpent. Had they tried to open the rusted locks, break the wall of bricks, and bring the treasure to daylight, they would have released the monster. And me too, but nobody cared about me.

Perhaps I was the monster. Perhaps the monster was this lost youth, who lay immobile on the sofa. Wasn't it he who left me alone in the cellar, closed the heavy doors, and tried to forget that I once existed? He had been beaten. Then he had beaten himself.

I looked up and saw it was lighter. Unspeakable brightness shone through the window at the ceiling. It was something new. It pulled me irresistibly towards it. Hence, I floated, and I noticed I could move through windowpanes. Even through stone walls.

I felt better. I was no longer so unhappy. The chains of desolation no longer held me; my mind felt as light as my floating body.

The forest was full of life, greenness, and song of birds. I floated, and I looked at this beautiful island. The slopes of the volcano bathed in morning sun. The grass of the plains swelled in refreshing wind. I screwed my eyes due to all this brightness that filled my wondering mind. Far beyond the edges of the island, the sea glittered, vast and blue.

*   *   *

The rays of light irritated my eyelids and the landscape was covered by brightness that attracted and absorbed me, until I saw human figures in the light. It was so bright that they could only be seen as silhouettes. I had a flash of thought that I was again in the space, but the figures were too short, too slender, and too long-limbed to be titans.

"Are you ready now?" asked one of the figures. I recognized the voice, but I couldn't remember.

"I'm ready", I said, and I heard my own voice as if it was that of a little boy. "For so long I wanted to die that I'm no longer afraid."

Then I opened my eyes fully, and around the ray of light fallen upon me from heavens, the darker shades started forming shapes. I was lying on a sofa, and around me, there were hessian sacks for seats. Three youths were standing by my sofa – Max, Roland, and Emilio.

"But how?" I wondered. "How am I here?"

"Where would you be then?" asked Max and flashed me a smile. "You had a long trip, hadn't you?"

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