Destiel smut and fluff oneshots

The Pie

I'm wide awake, it's four in the morning, leave me alone.

Deans POV

Cas was sauntering around the bunker in those tight pants again. I felt my pants get tighter and sighed, I walked to the kitchen and grabbed a pie.

I grabbed the apple pie and locked myself in my room. I unzipped my pants and imagined the pie was Cas.

-

I put the pie back in the fridge and waited. Cas walked in and made himself a piece, he sat down across from me and began eating it.

"Is this a new kind of apple pie?" He asked, looking at the pie confused. "It tastes salty and there's bits of white in it."

I looked at him and smirked, he looked down and the pie and groaned. "You didn't," he said, puking it back up.

"Oh I did," I said, laughing at his pain.

"What happened?" Sam asked, walking into the kitchen.

"He did it again," Cas said, gagging on the floor.

"Dude again?" Sam yelled, walking away.

Note: and that's my conclusion of why I need mental help, thank you and goodnight.