Valentine's Arrow

3: Blood on Your Hands

"Why would I know that?" Rebecca said sharply.

He shrugged. "Figured you were playing some biting games with that Daylighter."

Rebecca pursed her lips. "Nothing like that ever happened between me and Simon. And even if it did, why would I tell you? It's none of your business."

Sebastian raised his eyebrows. "Take it easy, spitfire. I never asked."

She rolled her eyes. "What are you doing with a vampire in your bed, anyway? Don't you hate and despise Downworlders?"

"No," he said. "Don't mix me up with Valentine."

"Yeah," she muttered. "Tough mistake to make."

"It's not my fault I look like him." For the first time, Sebastian's voice held a tinge of bitterness. Rebecca stared at him.

"See, there you go again," he said, somewhat exasperated. "You're always looking at me like that."

Startled, she said, "Like what?"

"Like I burn down animal shelters for fun and light my cigarettes with orphans." He poured another glass of water.

"You killed a child," Rebecca pointed out, amazed to find that her voice was steely calm. Usually, she couldn't talk about Max without breaking something or bursting into tears. Sometimes both. "You killed my little brother. That's not something you can be forgiven for, ever."

Sebastian drew in a breath. "So that's it," he said. "Cards on the table so soon, Lightwood?"

"What did you think?" she said venomously, and to her surprise, Sebastian flinched as if she had slapped him.

"Would you believe me if I told you it was an accident?" he said, setting his glass down on the counter. "I didn't mean to kill him. Just to knock him out, so he wouldn't tell-"

"Like you did with me?" Rebecca laughed sourly.

"I misjudged my own strength," he said quietly. "You were strong enough to take it, but Max-"

"And Sebastian Verlac? The real one? You killed him, didn't you?"

Sebastian looked at his own hands as if they were someone else's. There was a silver chain holding a flat metal plate around his right wrist - hiding the scar where Isabelle had once sliced his hand away. "Max wasn't supposed to fight back-"

"DO NOT SAY HIS NAME!" There was the sound of shattering glass - Rebecca had thrown the glass she had been holding at the wall behind Sebastian's head. Pity she hadn't thrown it at his head. "Don't say his name." She wasn't yelling anymore, but her voice was trembling, and she hated the sound of it, hated to look weak in front of Sebastian. She took a deep breath and tried to sound calm. "You have no right. Don't you dare say his name."

She didn't remember getting to her feet, but she became aware that she was on her feet now, chest heaving, ears humming. "He was a nine-year old boy," she said, her voice a little more than a whisper. "How could you kill a nine-year old boy?"

Sebastian didn't reply. He was simply gazing at her with an odd expression on his face - pity, maybe. That only made Rebecca angrier. She started to leave, but he clamped a hand around her wrist, forcing her to stop in her tracks.

"Let me go."

"You believe Jace is different," Sebastian said quietly. "You believe he isn't the same person, that my blood changed him. Don't you?"

Rebecca simply nodded. She didn't trust herself to speak.

"Then, why is it so hard to believe it might go the other way? Maybe his blood changed me. Maybe I'm not the same person I was."